*In case this story gets deleted/removed:*
**AITA because I went on my honeymoon without my brand new wife since she "had" to take care of her sister?**
I just got married. My wife, Tonya, basically raised her sister, Marie, after their mom passed away. Even after their dad remarried Tonya and her sister were more mom/daughter than sisters.
Marie got married last year and she got pregnant right away. No not before. They figure they got pregnant on their honeymoon.
Marie went into premature labor at our wedding reception. She gave birth to a tiny but healthy baby girl. And for some reason Tonya decided that she needed to go take care of her.
We were supposed to leave for our honeymoon two days after our wedding but Tonya said she couldn't just leave. She isn't a doctor or a nurse. Marie has a dad, a stepmom, a husband, a mother and father in law. I don't understand why she had to go.
But we had nonrefundable tickets. And insurance didn't cover "I have to stay and take care of my sister" as part of the coverage. Plus I had booked two weeks off for my wedding and honeymoon.
So since I was going to be home by myself doing nothing while my wife was in another city doing whatever I went on the honeymoon by myself.
I got a massive bed all to myself. I used all the resort credits that were for couples massages, romantic excursions, and special meals on deep sea fishing and a dune buggy tour of the island.
I just got back and my wife is still with her sister. But she is upset that I went on our honeymoons by myself.
Was I supposed to let the money go to waste? Was I supposed to sit at home playing Diablo while I waited for her to be done?
We are fighting about it. My friends all agree that I would have been dumb to waste the money and my time off.
Her friends think I was a dick to go enjoy myself while she was taking care of her sister and a new baby.
I will add that there was no place for me to stay at Marie's house. Tonya is sleeping in the nursery since the baby is still in NICU.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If Reddit wasn't so straight he'd take his best male friend instead and upon arriving at the hotel they'd learn that there's no more free rooms and â oh no, the honeymoon suite only has one bed!
The part that kills me about these posts is just the fact that you KNOW, if this were written from the wife's perspective, half the comments would be suggesting that the husband probably cheated on that honeymoon.
Well you don't honestly expect a MAN to go on his honeymoon and not get sex?? You must be one of those irrational female person types I keep hearing about.
It's so fucking stupid. Either people making up stories to corroborate with the fiction they're replying to, or, worse, people humblebragging about something that happened. It was similar on the post last night about the exhausted nurse who didn't give up her seat to a pregnant women. Full of "I had a difficult pregnancy and I wouldn't dream of asking someone that!"
The fuck I wouldn't have. Ok maybe not the exhausted nurse, but I was in so much pain when I was standing I legit might have just sat on someone's lap.
I was pregnant during COVID though, so I was on the metro like three times. And each time, someone offered me a seat.
Most people do. Because they're polite and it's an easy way to make someone's life a little better. AITAland is full of assholes who think that doing more than the absolute barest minimum is doormat behavior.
I wouldn't have, but not because it's a moral thing -- I'm just too anxious about confrontation (and because I'm fat, I never looked definitively pregnant to strangers until pretty much the end of the run) and accept all suffering and discomfort as something I brought upon myself. It's a _failure_ not to advocate for ourselves when we're in pain or otherwise suffering.
Ugh! whenever someone makes a post about some fictional woman acting totally inappropriately to drum up the misogyny there's always a thousand posts from a bunch of women going "NOT ME! I'D NEVER ACT LIKE THAT, I'M ALWAYS PERFECT" I can't believe how many women just love hating on other women. It's amazing.
Which is also so silly for comparing two different peopleâs conditions. I had a coworker who was completely disabled when he got a migraine and had to stay home. I could usually work through mine. He wasnât wrong or weak or whatever. Our conditions werenât identical.
I learned my lesson about not comparing individual experiences years ago. When I was 17 I had a c-section that went swimmingly well and I was up and about the next day. Within a week I was pretty much living normally. Sure there was a little soreness but it was very mild. Other people would remark on my recovery and then talk about other women who didn't fair as well and sometimes they'd say things along the lines of they were obviously being dramatic given how easy I said it was. I would smugly agree.
5 years later I had my second c-section and OH HOLY HELL! It was a nightmare. I REFUSED to even try to get out of bed for days, I was strong painkillers and it was still non-stop agony. Even months later I would wake up in the middle of night and it was so hard to move i'd be in tears. I remembered the snotty attitude I had with my first surgery and I was humbled.
NTA I'm disabled but I'm way less needy and more productive than the disabled villain of your story! This doesn't relate to degree of disability they just have a moral failing!
Especially in the case of autism I fucking despise this. Calling autism a spectrum is putting it lightly, compared to other disorders that are a spectrum (basically everything). Being autistic means anything from completely non-verbal and basically not being able to comprehend the world around you, to 100% functioning people who need zero aid to lead a comfortable and functional life.
I'm going into the vapors from the conversation alone. I'd better go lie down. (actually, that doesn't sound like a bad idea, but I'm not sure my boss would grant me a nap break on the grounds of "I have the vapors.")
It's definitely a thing, yeah. I feel like there were a handful of these a long while back, when everything first reopened after covid, and I guess now we get to do it all over again for some reason. Yay.
âLet me be clear. If my wife is in labor and she asks for here sister to be there instead of me I'm going to Dave and Buster's. They can call me afterwards. â
Bruh, what?
Wait, that sounds like he's being a good dude
Like he'll just fuck right off if they need him to, and they can call him when they're ready for him to come back
I've never been to a Dave & Busters, but aren't they always downtown, where the hospitals are? I thought that was the chain's business model
I'm just picturing a dude going around the corner to drink and eat wings and watch the game (or whatever it is one does at that place), with his phone on the bar for when he's summoned back
Granted, I didn't see the context of that comment. Maybe it's one line pulled from an anti-woman rant. But without context, it sounds super considerate and understanding to me
...God damn, that comment got downvoted by at least 5 people? Man, between this and my apparently horrifying opinion that 2 turkey sandwiches/wraps, a salad, and 2 hard-boiled eggs was a great lunch for a 9th grader to bring to dance camp yesterday, y'all are dicks lately
Right so your wife is labour, risking her life, and she might call you at any minute, or you might get called at any minute by hospital staff for anything from her having successfully given birth to her dying and it's considerate to leave and fuck off so that when you're needed it takes what? 10? 20? minutes to get back instead of the 30 fucking seconds it would take if you're in the waiting room??
I literally can't think of a context in which this would be super considerate and understanding
Lol yes exactly hahaÂ
I was like "Damn, his wife and sister-in-law told him to get the fuck, so he got the fuck, what's the big deal? Cell phones exist and he's just around the corner" but yes it does read differently if it's his own wife. Woops
On paper, you're 100% correct. If there's nothing helpful you can do, why not do something fun?
In practice though, you should show some level of solidarity with your partner. Even if it's totally illogical. Having fun while they go through tough times shows you're not thinking about them.
"Logical" behaviour in the face of worry means you're either a robot or just don't care.
It's not super logical to go to Dave and Busters while your partner is going through a process that can result in injury or death though. While you're downing a beer and some wings, what if they call you to the hospital because it's an emergency? Even if D&B is right next door, you got to ask for your check, wait, get your check and wait for the server to pick it up, possibly wait more if you're paying by card, then get to wherever you're supposed to be in the hospital probably 20 minutes later. Like hell, she could be dead by then and you were her proxy and were not available to make any medical decisions because you wanted to chill? Leaving while your child is being born is illogical.
Is sitting at a corporate chain bar by the hospital eating wings and watching TV while your wife is supporting her sister at rhe hospital next door "fun" though? That sounds stressful and shitty to me, but people need to eat, and if you're gonna be there awhile, you might as well have a drink, too.Â
I mean, I'm a woman, but if my partner were supporting their sibling who's scared and in pain in the hospital, and they told me to get the fuck out, I'd get the fuck out, and I'd find somewhere to be within a couple blocks. They put places like that right by hospitals for that exact reason. Well, that, and so the nurses have a place to decompress after work, I guess.Â
At least somebody's downvoting your (fairly reasonable) comment too đÂ
If your *wife* is going through a medical emergency (which labor is or can turn into ona done) you absolutely do not need to be drinking because you are her default medical proxy.
I think it's pretty obvious from the comment that you're responding to that I misread the original comment that started this thread, but I see that you've whipped yourself into a righteous rage so sure, go ahead and scold me for being a man in a bar while his wife is in labor (even though I'm a wife-less woman on a couch and that's not the situation I was picturing hours ago when I made those comments)
Yeah, the ragey comment you made ***after*** the one where I showed quite clearly that I had been doing other stuff throughout the day and was operating under the mistaken assumption that we were talking about some dude's sister-in-law
But I get it, you gotta put your righteous rage somewhereÂ
Not to defend the accuracy of a AITA post - but it doesnât, really. It just means theyâre not strong enough to thrive at home yet. My daughter was born seven weeks premature - fortunately Iâd had some preterm labor three weeks prior and theyâd been able to stop it and give me some medication to help develop her lungs, so she didnât need to be on oxygen much after her birth. She was not strong enough to feed on her own, however, and was only 4lbs,4oz at birth so she didnât have much to lose (she also couldnât spend more than 1 hour out of the incubator because she was too cold). She had to be on an IV for her first week, then a feeding tube because she didnât have the strength to take a bottle (and they also gave her medication because she spat up very easily at first and digested very slowly, and they needed to get more calories in her). She was ready to come home when she could take a bottle (it was three months before she could breastfeed) and weighed 5lbs. That took a month.
It was a serious and very difficult situation, but there was never any point where we were seriously concerned that she wasnât going to make it or anything like that.
Our NICU baby was six weeks premature (preeclampsia) and lingered for 5 weeks -- he was only really in a scary place for a couple of days. We hadn't had warning and thus, his lungs weren't quite ready yet, but I want to say he was on room air after about 10 days, if that long. And even then, scary never seemed to have an air that he was in any danger, if that makes sense? I was scared until he was on room air and not having desats, but I didn't expect him to ever die, y'know?
So all that said, the reason for his long stay? Blood sugar. Homeboy just could _not_ regulate his blood sugar when they tried to shorten his feed times. Even when he was nursing or taking a bottle, he still needed a feeding tube because otherwise his blood sugar would tank. It was the wildest thing, because he really was a healthy premie who wasn't in significant danger, he just wasn't quite ready for the chaos of being at home.
Isn't it amazing what modern medicine can do??
I'd say needing such care (& inpatient) is a sign stuff is pretty wrong. That extra care was vital in things not being worse. It doesn't mean a negative prognosis, more than direct intervention and monitoring is vital.
Whatever the truth of this story, it is totally normal for an early premature baby to be both "healthy" and in an incubator in hospital for a couple of weeks. There's nothing weird about that bit.
But if my sister had a preemie that was going to be in the NICU for an extended period, I think it would be reasonable for family to go help out, even if the kid was anticipated to be released in time. She would be spending a lot of time at the hospital with the baby and not have time for things like doing laundry and cooking meals. My baby was in the NICU for a couple days, and I was also in the hospital but spent my time either with her in the NICU or in my hospital room eating or pumping to try to feed her. Fortunately she got released when I was and I was able to take her home, or we would have been driving back and forth between home and the hospital several times a day.
the comment section **broke my brain**
have these people ever heard of emotional support? how would his wife have even enjoyed the honeymoon with this going on? i kept scrolling and scrolling but nope, everyone was like "nope, wifey sucks ass". terrible
See what you're forgetting is that no one on Earth owes anyone anything at all and it's actually violating the OPs boundaries to consider anyone besides himself. /s
I get where people are coming from on the priority angle, but honestly even if she had gone on the trip she would have been tied to her phone checking on the sister an niece and I doubt she possibly could have fully enjoyed the trip even if she did have the best of intentions.
Why the f would he be the first priority? He didn't just have emergency abdominal surgery to extract a not-done baby who's not well enough to go home even 2 weeks later
What kind of person would prioritize a healthy, grown-ass adult's fun in that situation
Ah, but consider this: what kind of selfish monster isnât down for sexy honeymoon fun time when the sister she practically raised just had a major medical event and doesnât even know if her baby will live, yet?
I dunno about you, but the idea of my pseudo-daughter spending every minute in pain and fearing for the life of her hospitalized newborn? That's a real turn-on for me! Hawaii or bust, baby!!
Oh, yeah, my bad! Youâre totally right, those massage coupons would have been just the thing to take her mind off it. âHey, sis, howâs it going in the NICU? Ah, still touch and go. K, well Iâm off to get pampered and take a dune buggy ride. Lemme know if the nibling dies or whatever.â
for real. and the dude kept commenting weird shit about how heâs ânot a doctorâ and that he listed âthe ambulanceâ as his emergency contact, and would double down whenever someone pointed out that normal people donât behave like that. he was definitely warping the story to make himself seem more sympathetic
I thought this was a rage bait but with all these NTA comments I am realizing my moral scale and the scale of the average AITA readers are totally mismatched. I seriously can't comprehend how someone is NTA if this situation was real.
Yeah you guys weren't exaggerating. Are they nuts for putting a vacation over physical and emotional wellbeing of a mom, kid, a father. Like, what kinda person can seriously enjoy romantic shit while their nibling is in a serious condition? Teenage shit doesn't make sense because I was one and would sulk but easily cancel trips for medical issues.
I was appalled by so many of the comments. How quickly so many people who would dismiss their wife. Their wives sister who was essentially her daughter and a baby who could possibly not make it... for a vacation. Way to many people have their priorities wrong.Â
You would think any sane person would go "yup, you are an AH" after he stated he has no idea how the baby is doing, or why the baby is in the intencive care. Because he did not ask, since big bed and massages. That level of uncare should be the reddest of all flags. But nope, money is more important.
This one is crazy, I can't believe all the NTA and the comments who clearly hate the wife. If this is real obviously no option is "ideal" but it's pretty heartless to go on a honeymoon without your wife while your wife is dealing with a family emergency. Did he call her at all or inquire about the sister? Or just enjoy all those massages on the beach? Wild.
Also the, "there was no place for me to stay there". There always is, a room that fits one, fits 2. Matras on the floor, one of those who blows up themselves and solved, if you want to.
At least a fair amount is poking holes by asking info. Also big hotels almost always allow you to reschedule, even if they might charge a fee. You pay a day, two max for that.
Also she has a stepmom while sister raised her kind of makes that point weak. Not hard to figure out that she would not have a ( strong)bond with stepmother is she did not help raise her.
Thatâs insane to me too because my husband wouldâve canceled the whole thing and I think anyone in a healthy loving relationship wouldnât do that to their SO. Thatâs not how family emergencies work in adult relationships.
I think what's really being missed is how did Marie end up with the baby in a totally different city than where she went into premature labor?
It's not like you start having a baby and then are able to insist "This baby need the NICU, but also not the closest NICU to me right now, the one closest to my house!"
Itâs about levels of service. Level 1 facilities have your basic âyou gave birth to a healthy baby and are recovering nicely; congrats!â services. Level 2 has some NICU services for preemies born after 32 weeks.
But level 3 is where the sickest and most medically complex babies go.
[Hereâs some better details.](https://www.verywellfamily.com/all-about-the-nicu-2748422)
Itâs just like hospitals have trauma care levels. If someone is in a lumber mill explosion and lives, theyâll probably end up for care in my city because itâs the closest trauma centre in the north. But sometimes injuries are bad enough that the patient is flown to a facility with better capabilities for better survival odds. The closest one is about an hour by airplane or eight hours to drive.
This, it's making sure the baby (or trauma patient) has the facilities to survive and recover.
I can't imagine having to air lift someone in labor. Is that even possible?
If itâs âthey will both die in the field, regardlessâ or âwe have a shot at saving at least one of them and weâre already here anyway,â I donât see why you couldnât.
Itâs loud and uncomfortable, but a baby will come out where it comes out.
Most hospitals *don't* have a NICU. Ususally there's only one or two hospitals with NICU in any given major city, and possible to have no hospitals with NICU in rural areas.Â
There's 20+ hospitals in a 2-3hr drive radius near me and only 3 had NICU.Â
>Â Ususally there's only one or two hospitals with NICU in any given major city,
Really!?! I just checked and there's like 7 in mine, and 11 if you count the further-away suburbs (still a short drive compared to what most Americans are used to), and 20something within a 2 hour drive (not counting if you drive the other way and cross state lines)
No NICUs in a rural area is unfortunate, but it makes sense. Crazy that there are cities with only 1 or 2. I guess I just assume cities have a hell of a lot more resources than they do.
There seems to be a high density of hospitals near you.
In the 20+ hospitals around me that I'm counting, some are quite small ones and may not even have a maternity ward.
đ€Ł
So many responses within a few hours - and it's been removed already!
Yet none of those commenters will think twice before falling for another one in the next 5 minutes.
đ€·
It's honestly horrifying how easily they're willing to dehumanize OP's wife for wanting to be there for her sister and niece after a traumatic incident happened
A healthy baby is not going to be in the NICU, that baby had a big chance of not making it, and even she does, she will still be under a lot of stress from the procedures done to her
"But she ruined the honeymoon" oh boo hoo, I dont like saying people have it worse but someone is quite literally having it worse!
Not only is it her sister but he also said that she basically raised her, so she likely has maternal feelings for her, too. Itâs not just a matter of being there for her sister. Sheâs probably also shaken by the experience and needs to be with her sister, whom she obviously cares about and wants to be okay. I donât think Iâd be able to enjoy a vacation when Iâm worried about my sister and niece tbh.
And apparently adamant that 'when I got shot in the leg at 15 I wanted a doctor and not emotional support'. Yeah, it's not one or the other, and it's not normal for a 15 year old not to want a parent there after getting fucking shot!
Wow. There was also a comment from a woman saying she had had 4 c-sections and you never stay for 5 nights! So the sister is just milking the attention and lying. Meanwhile, in my country, a minimum 4 day stay is mandatory after a c-section.
My sister just had a kid and we are super close. Our parents were always there, so we don't have a child-parent relationship, just close siblings. If my nephew or sister were in the ICU, especially immediately post birth, there is absolutely no way I would be going on my honeymoon. I would be way too stressed out to enjoy it. If it happened while I was on the honeymoon, I'd be looking at booking an immediate flight home. I'd also expect my significant other to be there to support me through it. My response would be the same as though my best friend was in the ICU.
I get that different people have different relationships with their siblings, but OOP seems to be narcissistically obtuse of his spouse's relationship with hers. I can't believe the number of NTA responses.
Same here! And I know without a doubt that my husband would also cancel the honeymoon and stick around to support us both, not even out of obligation but because itâs what you want to do when you really care about someone. Do I think not doing so makes someone a terrible person? Not necessarily, but itâs really weird and I canât wrap my head around that not just being a given for someone.
In the comments, someone asked him, âIf your wife had [âŠ] gone with you to the honeymoon but been extremely anxious, constantly checking her messages for updates on her sister and niece and unable to enjoy the experience as a result[,] would you also have been cross with her for âruiningâ the trip?â
His response: âNope. That would be normal.â
And the commenter said, âIn that case, NTA.â
So close! The cognitive dissonance is astounding.
Im shocked how Redditors dont seem to care about vain grand weddings in general, infact they'll boast about the outdated nature of this institution. And yet, this bothers them. What's the hierarchy, i mean do they hate newborns more or something? Lmao romantic relationships aren't the only ones you need to be there for.
Nah but she's a mareied lady now so your husband is her first priority. I swear even my conservative family would understand that the god husband shouldn't come first before a mom and baby's health.
Real question, because I'm too poor to internationally travel.... does travel insurance really not cover "we have to cancel the trip due to a family emergency"? Like someone in her family-- because that baby *is* her family-- is in intensive care.
Google says it usually covers medical emergencies of non-traveling immediate family members, which would include a niece/nephew in the NICU. Guess I did more research just now than OOP.
I don't think neices/nephews usually count as immediate family members, do they?
I always thought "immediate family" was parents, siblings, spouse, or children?
Although maybe the sister would count, if she was still hospitalized?
Yeah it would vary by plan but it seemed like they typically use a pretty broad definition including grandparents, aunts/uncles, nieces/nephews, and in-laws.Â
OOP should have written this about his wifeâs cousin whoâs *like* a sister to her, then theyâd be out of luck.
>Â Marie got married last year and she got pregnant right away. No not before.Â
Who cares? It's 2024z nobody gives a fuck if you get married at all. Pregnancy and parenthood doesn't require a legally-binding contract with the other parent, nor does it require a deity's earthly representatives blessing of that contract
> They figure they got pregnant on their honeymoon.
Oh thank God I know exactly when this child was conceived, this would have been a major plot hole otherwise
>Â She gave birth to a tiny but healthy baby girl
So why is this "healthy" baby still in the NICU 2 weeks later? This is ragebait, right?
Hmmm...is there a word for a post that encourages the misogynists to come out to play, but a key detail is included that guarantees prolonged and impassioned arguments in the comments section?
Because it's a pretty good way to get a ton of engagement. Otherwise it's just incels and pick-mes in an echo chamber agreeing with each other. And arguments get a way better comment count than a quick and easy consensusÂ
He's the AH for this comment on another thread, if for nothing else: "Baby was just over a month premature and just under four pounds. I think all preemies go into some sort of special unit."
I could just SEE his dismissive hand wave.
Can somebody explain this comment
> [My guess is that itâs being brigaded by some anti-women sub. It happens a lot with these types of posts. There are a few key words that keep coming up which is the biggest sign. Way too many people are using the term âannulmentâ instead of âdivorceâ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/1dioo20/comment/l95hgtk/)
Is this a thing now? Why is annulment suddenly popular with redpill/incel/MGTOW dirtbags?
> I just got married. My wife, Tonya, basically raised her sister, Marie, after their mom passed away. Even after their dad remarried Tonya and her sister were more mom/daughter than sisters.
-
> ...Marie has a dad, a stepmom, a husband, a mother and father in law. I don't understand why she had to go.
A Dad and step-mom who left her sister to take care of her and a mother-in-law and father-in-law who she may or may not be close to.
That's *so much* support! >!s/!<
So, a "good support system" means siblings should just fly off during a serious family emergency and let everyone else deal with it? Are the commenters on drugs or just children wtaf?
I don't want to be debating judgment here, but wow, the overall uniformity of "NTA, the tickets/vacation would have been wasted, and you need to divorce/annul the marriage because you will never be a priority " is crazy.
Almost none of these children think about what something like that can be for family, and maybe you shouldn't honeymoon without your spouse, even if it causes tickets and reservations to be lost
Beep boop! Automod here with a quick reminder to never brigade r/AmITheAsshole or other subs under any circumstances. Brigading puts you in violation of both our rules and Redditâs TOS, and therefore puts this sub at risk of ban. If you brigade/encourage brigading of any kind, you will be banned from participating in either sub. Satirizing of posts should stay within this sub, which means that participating directly in linked posts should either be done in good faith or not at all.
Want some freed, live, discussion that neither AITA nor Reddit itself can censor? Join our [official discord server](https://discord.gg/KbZnaXX)
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
From The Office:
*Michael Scott: Where's Andy?*
*Oscar Martinez : He's on one of his honeymoons.*
*Michael Scott : What?*
*Oscar Martinez : He made nonrefundable deposits on his honeymoons, so he's just knocking them off one at a time. I think today he's hot-air ballooning, and later he's got a couple's massage.*
Came to mind before I even read the part of OOP's post in which he referred to "our honeymoons" (plural).
*In case this story gets deleted/removed:* **AITA because I went on my honeymoon without my brand new wife since she "had" to take care of her sister?** I just got married. My wife, Tonya, basically raised her sister, Marie, after their mom passed away. Even after their dad remarried Tonya and her sister were more mom/daughter than sisters. Marie got married last year and she got pregnant right away. No not before. They figure they got pregnant on their honeymoon. Marie went into premature labor at our wedding reception. She gave birth to a tiny but healthy baby girl. And for some reason Tonya decided that she needed to go take care of her. We were supposed to leave for our honeymoon two days after our wedding but Tonya said she couldn't just leave. She isn't a doctor or a nurse. Marie has a dad, a stepmom, a husband, a mother and father in law. I don't understand why she had to go. But we had nonrefundable tickets. And insurance didn't cover "I have to stay and take care of my sister" as part of the coverage. Plus I had booked two weeks off for my wedding and honeymoon. So since I was going to be home by myself doing nothing while my wife was in another city doing whatever I went on the honeymoon by myself. I got a massive bed all to myself. I used all the resort credits that were for couples massages, romantic excursions, and special meals on deep sea fishing and a dune buggy tour of the island. I just got back and my wife is still with her sister. But she is upset that I went on our honeymoons by myself. Was I supposed to let the money go to waste? Was I supposed to sit at home playing Diablo while I waited for her to be done? We are fighting about it. My friends all agree that I would have been dumb to waste the money and my time off. Her friends think I was a dick to go enjoy myself while she was taking care of her sister and a new baby. I will add that there was no place for me to stay at Marie's house. Tonya is sleeping in the nursery since the baby is still in NICU. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Yet another "Went on honeymoon without spouse" post. It's odd that this is now a category.
Its all the rage these days.
So hot right now
Underrated comment
I mean, it's a nice change from the misogynistic paternity fraud theme.
The "women are irrational and bitchy" theme is an upgrade from women are evilđđ feminism stay winning
Iâm a woman who married a man. AITA? Reddit: Yes.Â
Next up: am I the asshole for going on my honeymoon alone after my wife admitted right before the wedding that she cheated and our kid isnât mine?
Needs to include the sister basically replacing the wife somehow. Maybe they can go on the honeymoon with the sister?
If Reddit wasn't so straight he'd take his best male friend instead and upon arriving at the hotel they'd learn that there's no more free rooms and â oh no, the honeymoon suite only has one bed!
Been a while since we got an art room storyâŠ
The part that kills me about these posts is just the fact that you KNOW, if this were written from the wife's perspective, half the comments would be suggesting that the husband probably cheated on that honeymoon.
Well you don't honestly expect a MAN to go on his honeymoon and not get sex?? You must be one of those irrational female person types I keep hearing about.
Well it is wedding season after all
Anyone else cringing whenever a comment on AITA & co starts with "I am gay/trans/female too/I also had twins, but NTA"
It's so fucking stupid. Either people making up stories to corroborate with the fiction they're replying to, or, worse, people humblebragging about something that happened. It was similar on the post last night about the exhausted nurse who didn't give up her seat to a pregnant women. Full of "I had a difficult pregnancy and I wouldn't dream of asking someone that!"
The fuck I wouldn't have. Ok maybe not the exhausted nurse, but I was in so much pain when I was standing I legit might have just sat on someone's lap. I was pregnant during COVID though, so I was on the metro like three times. And each time, someone offered me a seat.
Most people do. Because they're polite and it's an easy way to make someone's life a little better. AITAland is full of assholes who think that doing more than the absolute barest minimum is doormat behavior.
Iâm convinced theyâre all 17-20 year old incels living in the basement lol
Most of them are, probably.
I wouldn't have, but not because it's a moral thing -- I'm just too anxious about confrontation (and because I'm fat, I never looked definitively pregnant to strangers until pretty much the end of the run) and accept all suffering and discomfort as something I brought upon myself. It's a _failure_ not to advocate for ourselves when we're in pain or otherwise suffering.
Ugh! whenever someone makes a post about some fictional woman acting totally inappropriately to drum up the misogyny there's always a thousand posts from a bunch of women going "NOT ME! I'D NEVER ACT LIKE THAT, I'M ALWAYS PERFECT" I can't believe how many women just love hating on other women. It's amazing.
Oh ,that person was a resident. Not a nurse.... Lol
Ah, I forgot which it was. Thanks.
Drink every time someone says "NTA I'm autistic and I would never act like your autistic sibling/neighbour/co-worker/random person in a public place!"
Which is also so silly for comparing two different peopleâs conditions. I had a coworker who was completely disabled when he got a migraine and had to stay home. I could usually work through mine. He wasnât wrong or weak or whatever. Our conditions werenât identical.
Some days my migraines hit wildly different. I might be out for 3 days, I might be able to keep on. Never know. It can vary in the same person!
I get migraines with an aura that I can push through, and tension headaches that are debilitating.
I learned my lesson about not comparing individual experiences years ago. When I was 17 I had a c-section that went swimmingly well and I was up and about the next day. Within a week I was pretty much living normally. Sure there was a little soreness but it was very mild. Other people would remark on my recovery and then talk about other women who didn't fair as well and sometimes they'd say things along the lines of they were obviously being dramatic given how easy I said it was. I would smugly agree. 5 years later I had my second c-section and OH HOLY HELL! It was a nightmare. I REFUSED to even try to get out of bed for days, I was strong painkillers and it was still non-stop agony. Even months later I would wake up in the middle of night and it was so hard to move i'd be in tears. I remembered the snotty attitude I had with my first surgery and I was humbled.
NTA I'm disabled but I'm way less needy and more productive than the disabled villain of your story! This doesn't relate to degree of disability they just have a moral failing!
Especially in the case of autism I fucking despise this. Calling autism a spectrum is putting it lightly, compared to other disorders that are a spectrum (basically everything). Being autistic means anything from completely non-verbal and basically not being able to comprehend the world around you, to 100% functioning people who need zero aid to lead a comfortable and functional life.
I did that and now I need a new liver đą As someone who has donated parts of my liver a bunch of times, YTA if you donât give me yours
Do you want them to black out or something?!
"I had *twins* in the NICU and my sister stayed by my side while her new husband went off on their honeymoon and you are NTA"
r/AsABlackMan
The phrases âAs someone who [x]â / âAs a person with [y]â and all variations just make me irrationally irritated now.
What is with all these people going into labour at weddings? I feel like I've seen at least 3 posts that mention this in the last few months.
Someone needs to reverse the story and have a spontaneous wedding in the middle of a maternity ward.
I think that was an episode of New Girl.
They did it on The Nanny, too. Niles and CC got married right beside Fran in labor
Women just get super stimulated at weddings and go into labor, it's a medical fact, don't you know basic women's physiology? /s
They just go into hysterics at all the excitement and their womb tries to escape the body, duh.
Women be hystericalÂ
I'm going into the vapors from the conversation alone. I'd better go lie down. (actually, that doesn't sound like a bad idea, but I'm not sure my boss would grant me a nap break on the grounds of "I have the vapors.")
Seems we've found the reason for hysteria deriving from the greek for womb after all
Its a great leap from wedding announcements to pregnancy announcements. Now new in town... labour announcements
You know how when you put a bunch of bananas together they'll ripen each other and any other fruits around? Yeah, it's like that.
Yep, we all need to keep your âfruitsâ separated.
I mean it KINDA can happen. Oxytocin can speed things up a bit. Just a bit though.
Yes, it's well known weddings give guests oxytocin injectionsÂ
It's definitely a thing, yeah. I feel like there were a handful of these a long while back, when everything first reopened after covid, and I guess now we get to do it all over again for some reason. Yay.
"My husband and I concieved a baby while my sister was in labor AITA?
âLet me be clear. If my wife is in labor and she asks for here sister to be there instead of me I'm going to Dave and Buster's. They can call me afterwards. â Bruh, what?
Incels fortunately do not need to worry about their wives going into labor.
Wait, that sounds like he's being a good dude Like he'll just fuck right off if they need him to, and they can call him when they're ready for him to come back
But like stay in the hospital though. Why go and party when your partner is risking their life to bring your child in the world
I've never been to a Dave & Busters, but aren't they always downtown, where the hospitals are? I thought that was the chain's business model I'm just picturing a dude going around the corner to drink and eat wings and watch the game (or whatever it is one does at that place), with his phone on the bar for when he's summoned back Granted, I didn't see the context of that comment. Maybe it's one line pulled from an anti-woman rant. But without context, it sounds super considerate and understanding to me ...God damn, that comment got downvoted by at least 5 people? Man, between this and my apparently horrifying opinion that 2 turkey sandwiches/wraps, a salad, and 2 hard-boiled eggs was a great lunch for a 9th grader to bring to dance camp yesterday, y'all are dicks lately
Right so your wife is labour, risking her life, and she might call you at any minute, or you might get called at any minute by hospital staff for anything from her having successfully given birth to her dying and it's considerate to leave and fuck off so that when you're needed it takes what? 10? 20? minutes to get back instead of the 30 fucking seconds it would take if you're in the waiting room?? I literally can't think of a context in which this would be super considerate and understanding
I thought we were talking about some dude's wife's sister
> Let me be clear. If my wife is in labor and she asks for here sister to be there instead of me I'm going to Dave and Buster's.Â
Oh woops, that was hours ago lol
lmao now you know why people downvoted you so badly
Lol yes exactly haha I was like "Damn, his wife and sister-in-law told him to get the fuck, so he got the fuck, what's the big deal? Cell phones exist and he's just around the corner" but yes it does read differently if it's his own wife. Woops
On paper, you're 100% correct. If there's nothing helpful you can do, why not do something fun? In practice though, you should show some level of solidarity with your partner. Even if it's totally illogical. Having fun while they go through tough times shows you're not thinking about them. "Logical" behaviour in the face of worry means you're either a robot or just don't care.
It's not super logical to go to Dave and Busters while your partner is going through a process that can result in injury or death though. While you're downing a beer and some wings, what if they call you to the hospital because it's an emergency? Even if D&B is right next door, you got to ask for your check, wait, get your check and wait for the server to pick it up, possibly wait more if you're paying by card, then get to wherever you're supposed to be in the hospital probably 20 minutes later. Like hell, she could be dead by then and you were her proxy and were not available to make any medical decisions because you wanted to chill? Leaving while your child is being born is illogical.
Is sitting at a corporate chain bar by the hospital eating wings and watching TV while your wife is supporting her sister at rhe hospital next door "fun" though? That sounds stressful and shitty to me, but people need to eat, and if you're gonna be there awhile, you might as well have a drink, too. I mean, I'm a woman, but if my partner were supporting their sibling who's scared and in pain in the hospital, and they told me to get the fuck out, I'd get the fuck out, and I'd find somewhere to be within a couple blocks. They put places like that right by hospitals for that exact reason. Well, that, and so the nurses have a place to decompress after work, I guess. At least somebody's downvoting your (fairly reasonable) comment too đÂ
If your *wife* is going through a medical emergency (which labor is or can turn into ona done) you absolutely do not need to be drinking because you are her default medical proxy.
I think it's pretty obvious from the comment that you're responding to that I misread the original comment that started this thread, but I see that you've whipped yourself into a righteous rage so sure, go ahead and scold me for being a man in a bar while his wife is in labor (even though I'm a wife-less woman on a couch and that's not the situation I was picturing hours ago when I made those comments)
Yes, the one comment I've made to you really screams that I've whipped myself into a rage đ. Are you serious? Please.
Yeah, the ragey comment you made ***after*** the one where I showed quite clearly that I had been doing other stuff throughout the day and was operating under the mistaken assumption that we were talking about some dude's sister-in-law But I get it, you gotta put your righteous rage somewhereÂ
Tiny but healthy preemieâin the NICU for two weeks. Yes, hospitals are notorious for letting healthy people loiter in the ICU.
Yeah, my kids had a few day stay - and they took it very seriously, as a hospitalization of a newborn. 2 weeks means something is seriously wrong.
Not to defend the accuracy of a AITA post - but it doesnât, really. It just means theyâre not strong enough to thrive at home yet. My daughter was born seven weeks premature - fortunately Iâd had some preterm labor three weeks prior and theyâd been able to stop it and give me some medication to help develop her lungs, so she didnât need to be on oxygen much after her birth. She was not strong enough to feed on her own, however, and was only 4lbs,4oz at birth so she didnât have much to lose (she also couldnât spend more than 1 hour out of the incubator because she was too cold). She had to be on an IV for her first week, then a feeding tube because she didnât have the strength to take a bottle (and they also gave her medication because she spat up very easily at first and digested very slowly, and they needed to get more calories in her). She was ready to come home when she could take a bottle (it was three months before she could breastfeed) and weighed 5lbs. That took a month. It was a serious and very difficult situation, but there was never any point where we were seriously concerned that she wasnât going to make it or anything like that.
Our NICU baby was six weeks premature (preeclampsia) and lingered for 5 weeks -- he was only really in a scary place for a couple of days. We hadn't had warning and thus, his lungs weren't quite ready yet, but I want to say he was on room air after about 10 days, if that long. And even then, scary never seemed to have an air that he was in any danger, if that makes sense? I was scared until he was on room air and not having desats, but I didn't expect him to ever die, y'know? So all that said, the reason for his long stay? Blood sugar. Homeboy just could _not_ regulate his blood sugar when they tried to shorten his feed times. Even when he was nursing or taking a bottle, he still needed a feeding tube because otherwise his blood sugar would tank. It was the wildest thing, because he really was a healthy premie who wasn't in significant danger, he just wasn't quite ready for the chaos of being at home.
Sorry you went through that. Hope she's thriving now!
Isn't it amazing what modern medicine can do?? I'd say needing such care (& inpatient) is a sign stuff is pretty wrong. That extra care was vital in things not being worse. It doesn't mean a negative prognosis, more than direct intervention and monitoring is vital.
Whatever the truth of this story, it is totally normal for an early premature baby to be both "healthy" and in an incubator in hospital for a couple of weeks. There's nothing weird about that bit.
But if my sister had a preemie that was going to be in the NICU for an extended period, I think it would be reasonable for family to go help out, even if the kid was anticipated to be released in time. She would be spending a lot of time at the hospital with the baby and not have time for things like doing laundry and cooking meals. My baby was in the NICU for a couple days, and I was also in the hospital but spent my time either with her in the NICU or in my hospital room eating or pumping to try to feed her. Fortunately she got released when I was and I was able to take her home, or we would have been driving back and forth between home and the hospital several times a day.
No. But itâs a delicate time filled with anxiety for many people.
the comment section **broke my brain** have these people ever heard of emotional support? how would his wife have even enjoyed the honeymoon with this going on? i kept scrolling and scrolling but nope, everyone was like "nope, wifey sucks ass". terrible
Well, you see, the sister *chose* to be pregnant, so anything that happened isn't anyone else's responsibility! That's how people work, right?
See what you're forgetting is that no one on Earth owes anyone anything at all and it's actually violating the OPs boundaries to consider anyone besides himself. /s
Especially when it comes to family members. Doing anything kind or considerate for someone in your actual family is always gross.
but he isnt first even a hot minute after the wedding and it was only for 2 weeks, no family could help sis, no friends?
I get where people are coming from on the priority angle, but honestly even if she had gone on the trip she would have been tied to her phone checking on the sister an niece and I doubt she possibly could have fully enjoyed the trip even if she did have the best of intentions.
> but he isnt first even a hot minute after the wedding  First what? Sorry, I don't understand your comment
Probably first priority
Why the f would he be the first priority? He didn't just have emergency abdominal surgery to extract a not-done baby who's not well enough to go home even 2 weeks later What kind of person would prioritize a healthy, grown-ass adult's fun in that situation
Ah, but consider this: what kind of selfish monster isnât down for sexy honeymoon fun time when the sister she practically raised just had a major medical event and doesnât even know if her baby will live, yet?
I dunno about you, but the idea of my pseudo-daughter spending every minute in pain and fearing for the life of her hospitalized newborn? That's a real turn-on for me! Hawaii or bust, baby!!
Oh, yeah, my bad! Youâre totally right, those massage coupons would have been just the thing to take her mind off it. âHey, sis, howâs it going in the NICU? Ah, still touch and go. K, well Iâm off to get pampered and take a dune buggy ride. Lemme know if the nibling dies or whatever.â
The dumbest part is that this is exactly the kind of thing trip insurance would cover
She's got a "good support system" though, according to the guy who definitely isn't part of that system.
for real. and the dude kept commenting weird shit about how heâs ânot a doctorâ and that he listed âthe ambulanceâ as his emergency contact, and would double down whenever someone pointed out that normal people donât behave like that. he was definitely warping the story to make himself seem more sympathetic
I thought this was a rage bait but with all these NTA comments I am realizing my moral scale and the scale of the average AITA readers are totally mismatched. I seriously can't comprehend how someone is NTA if this situation was real.
Thatâs how I always feel when I read comments on AITA.
Yeah you guys weren't exaggerating. Are they nuts for putting a vacation over physical and emotional wellbeing of a mom, kid, a father. Like, what kinda person can seriously enjoy romantic shit while their nibling is in a serious condition? Teenage shit doesn't make sense because I was one and would sulk but easily cancel trips for medical issues.
I was appalled by so many of the comments. How quickly so many people who would dismiss their wife. Their wives sister who was essentially her daughter and a baby who could possibly not make it... for a vacation. Way to many people have their priorities wrong.Â
You would think any sane person would go "yup, you are an AH" after he stated he has no idea how the baby is doing, or why the baby is in the intencive care. Because he did not ask, since big bed and massages. That level of uncare should be the reddest of all flags. But nope, money is more important.
This stuck out to me. He didn't even know the situation.
Some interesting comments re-affirming the groom here.
This one is crazy, I can't believe all the NTA and the comments who clearly hate the wife. If this is real obviously no option is "ideal" but it's pretty heartless to go on a honeymoon without your wife while your wife is dealing with a family emergency. Did he call her at all or inquire about the sister? Or just enjoy all those massages on the beach? Wild.
Also the, "there was no place for me to stay there". There always is, a room that fits one, fits 2. Matras on the floor, one of those who blows up themselves and solved, if you want to. At least a fair amount is poking holes by asking info. Also big hotels almost always allow you to reschedule, even if they might charge a fee. You pay a day, two max for that. Also she has a stepmom while sister raised her kind of makes that point weak. Not hard to figure out that she would not have a ( strong)bond with stepmother is she did not help raise her.
Thatâs insane to me too because my husband wouldâve canceled the whole thing and I think anyone in a healthy loving relationship wouldnât do that to their SO. Thatâs not how family emergencies work in adult relationships.
I think what's really being missed is how did Marie end up with the baby in a totally different city than where she went into premature labor? It's not like you start having a baby and then are able to insist "This baby need the NICU, but also not the closest NICU to me right now, the one closest to my house!"
Itâs about levels of service. Level 1 facilities have your basic âyou gave birth to a healthy baby and are recovering nicely; congrats!â services. Level 2 has some NICU services for preemies born after 32 weeks. But level 3 is where the sickest and most medically complex babies go. [Hereâs some better details.](https://www.verywellfamily.com/all-about-the-nicu-2748422) Itâs just like hospitals have trauma care levels. If someone is in a lumber mill explosion and lives, theyâll probably end up for care in my city because itâs the closest trauma centre in the north. But sometimes injuries are bad enough that the patient is flown to a facility with better capabilities for better survival odds. The closest one is about an hour by airplane or eight hours to drive.
This, it's making sure the baby (or trauma patient) has the facilities to survive and recover. I can't imagine having to air lift someone in labor. Is that even possible?
If itâs âthey will both die in the field, regardlessâ or âwe have a shot at saving at least one of them and weâre already here anyway,â I donât see why you couldnât. Itâs loud and uncomfortable, but a baby will come out where it comes out.
Which is why the âbaby is healthyâ line is wild. The NICU isn't for healthy infants.
Most hospitals *don't* have a NICU. Ususally there's only one or two hospitals with NICU in any given major city, and possible to have no hospitals with NICU in rural areas. There's 20+ hospitals in a 2-3hr drive radius near me and only 3 had NICU.Â
>Â Ususally there's only one or two hospitals with NICU in any given major city, Really!?! I just checked and there's like 7 in mine, and 11 if you count the further-away suburbs (still a short drive compared to what most Americans are used to), and 20something within a 2 hour drive (not counting if you drive the other way and cross state lines) No NICUs in a rural area is unfortunate, but it makes sense. Crazy that there are cities with only 1 or 2. I guess I just assume cities have a hell of a lot more resources than they do.
There seems to be a high density of hospitals near you. In the 20+ hospitals around me that I'm counting, some are quite small ones and may not even have a maternity ward.
Are you in like...Wyoming or Saskatchewan or somewhere like that?Â
đ€Ł So many responses within a few hours - and it's been removed already! Yet none of those commenters will think twice before falling for another one in the next 5 minutes. đ€·
It's honestly horrifying how easily they're willing to dehumanize OP's wife for wanting to be there for her sister and niece after a traumatic incident happened A healthy baby is not going to be in the NICU, that baby had a big chance of not making it, and even she does, she will still be under a lot of stress from the procedures done to her "But she ruined the honeymoon" oh boo hoo, I dont like saying people have it worse but someone is quite literally having it worse!
Not only is it her sister but he also said that she basically raised her, so she likely has maternal feelings for her, too. Itâs not just a matter of being there for her sister. Sheâs probably also shaken by the experience and needs to be with her sister, whom she obviously cares about and wants to be okay. I donât think Iâd be able to enjoy a vacation when Iâm worried about my sister and niece tbh.
He also equated the c section and the baby being in the NICU to him being shot in the leg
Lmao wild. I just saw the post has been removed by the mods over there for not being truthful.
And apparently adamant that 'when I got shot in the leg at 15 I wanted a doctor and not emotional support'. Yeah, it's not one or the other, and it's not normal for a 15 year old not to want a parent there after getting fucking shot!
Imagine loving your family members⊠đ«š
Wow. There was also a comment from a woman saying she had had 4 c-sections and you never stay for 5 nights! So the sister is just milking the attention and lying. Meanwhile, in my country, a minimum 4 day stay is mandatory after a c-section.
My sister just had a kid and we are super close. Our parents were always there, so we don't have a child-parent relationship, just close siblings. If my nephew or sister were in the ICU, especially immediately post birth, there is absolutely no way I would be going on my honeymoon. I would be way too stressed out to enjoy it. If it happened while I was on the honeymoon, I'd be looking at booking an immediate flight home. I'd also expect my significant other to be there to support me through it. My response would be the same as though my best friend was in the ICU. I get that different people have different relationships with their siblings, but OOP seems to be narcissistically obtuse of his spouse's relationship with hers. I can't believe the number of NTA responses.
Same here! And I know without a doubt that my husband would also cancel the honeymoon and stick around to support us both, not even out of obligation but because itâs what you want to do when you really care about someone. Do I think not doing so makes someone a terrible person? Not necessarily, but itâs really weird and I canât wrap my head around that not just being a given for someone.
Are you serious?! Man op sucks and so do his little minions
In the comments, someone asked him, âIf your wife had [âŠ] gone with you to the honeymoon but been extremely anxious, constantly checking her messages for updates on her sister and niece and unable to enjoy the experience as a result[,] would you also have been cross with her for âruiningâ the trip?â His response: âNope. That would be normal.â And the commenter said, âIn that case, NTA.â So close! The cognitive dissonance is astounding.
Im shocked how Redditors dont seem to care about vain grand weddings in general, infact they'll boast about the outdated nature of this institution. And yet, this bothers them. What's the hierarchy, i mean do they hate newborns more or something? Lmao romantic relationships aren't the only ones you need to be there for.
"B-But she prioritized her sister đ„ș" Like uh no fucking shit her sister went through a traumatized birth where she and her baby could've died
Nah but she's a mareied lady now so your husband is her first priority. I swear even my conservative family would understand that the god husband shouldn't come first before a mom and baby's health.
Real question, because I'm too poor to internationally travel.... does travel insurance really not cover "we have to cancel the trip due to a family emergency"? Like someone in her family-- because that baby *is* her family-- is in intensive care.
Google says it usually covers medical emergencies of non-traveling immediate family members, which would include a niece/nephew in the NICU. Guess I did more research just now than OOP.
I don't think neices/nephews usually count as immediate family members, do they? I always thought "immediate family" was parents, siblings, spouse, or children? Although maybe the sister would count, if she was still hospitalized?
Yeah it would vary by plan but it seemed like they typically use a pretty broad definition including grandparents, aunts/uncles, nieces/nephews, and in-laws. OOP should have written this about his wifeâs cousin whoâs *like* a sister to her, then theyâd be out of luck.
> Marie got married last year and she got pregnant right away. No not before. Who cares? It's 2024z nobody gives a fuck if you get married at all. Pregnancy and parenthood doesn't require a legally-binding contract with the other parent, nor does it require a deity's earthly representatives blessing of that contract > They figure they got pregnant on their honeymoon. Oh thank God I know exactly when this child was conceived, this would have been a major plot hole otherwise > She gave birth to a tiny but healthy baby girl So why is this "healthy" baby still in the NICU 2 weeks later? This is ragebait, right?
It would be ragebait if people were pissed off with OOP, but a disturbingly high percentage of them are on his side.
Hmmm...is there a word for a post that encourages the misogynists to come out to play, but a key detail is included that guarantees prolonged and impassioned arguments in the comments section? Because it's a pretty good way to get a ton of engagement. Otherwise it's just incels and pick-mes in an echo chamber agreeing with each other. And arguments get a way better comment count than a quick and easy consensusÂ
Incelbait?
He's the AH for this comment on another thread, if for nothing else: "Baby was just over a month premature and just under four pounds. I think all preemies go into some sort of special unit." I could just SEE his dismissive hand wave.
Can somebody explain this comment > [My guess is that itâs being brigaded by some anti-women sub. It happens a lot with these types of posts. There are a few key words that keep coming up which is the biggest sign. Way too many people are using the term âannulmentâ instead of âdivorceâ](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/1dioo20/comment/l95hgtk/) Is this a thing now? Why is annulment suddenly popular with redpill/incel/MGTOW dirtbags?
I haven't heard of it, but I assume they like annulment because you don't lose any assets.Â
OOOOOOHHHH OK yeah I'm gonna agree with that commenter then, that was definitely some kind of redpill brigading going on in that post
> I just got married. My wife, Tonya, basically raised her sister, Marie, after their mom passed away. Even after their dad remarried Tonya and her sister were more mom/daughter than sisters. - > ...Marie has a dad, a stepmom, a husband, a mother and father in law. I don't understand why she had to go. A Dad and step-mom who left her sister to take care of her and a mother-in-law and father-in-law who she may or may not be close to. That's *so much* support! >!s/!<
So, a "good support system" means siblings should just fly off during a serious family emergency and let everyone else deal with it? Are the commenters on drugs or just children wtaf?
I don't want to be debating judgment here, but wow, the overall uniformity of "NTA, the tickets/vacation would have been wasted, and you need to divorce/annul the marriage because you will never be a priority " is crazy. Almost none of these children think about what something like that can be for family, and maybe you shouldn't honeymoon without your spouse, even if it causes tickets and reservations to be lost
OMG THANK YOU!!! i reposted this to am i the devil and they deleted it lol
The baby is healthy but also in intensive care?
I know this may be rage bait but if it isn't...he's definitely the a-hole.
The commenters were the opposite of rage-baited, in any case.
Has r/AmITheAsshole somehow gotten worse or is it just me? This does seem like ragebait but it's surprising how many commenters said NTA
Beep boop! Automod here with a quick reminder to never brigade r/AmITheAsshole or other subs under any circumstances. Brigading puts you in violation of both our rules and Redditâs TOS, and therefore puts this sub at risk of ban. If you brigade/encourage brigading of any kind, you will be banned from participating in either sub. Satirizing of posts should stay within this sub, which means that participating directly in linked posts should either be done in good faith or not at all. Want some freed, live, discussion that neither AITA nor Reddit itself can censor? Join our [official discord server](https://discord.gg/KbZnaXX) *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AmITheAngel) if you have any questions or concerns.*
This guy sounds like he could be the villain in a domestic thriller.
From The Office: *Michael Scott: Where's Andy?* *Oscar Martinez : He's on one of his honeymoons.* *Michael Scott : What?* *Oscar Martinez : He made nonrefundable deposits on his honeymoons, so he's just knocking them off one at a time. I think today he's hot-air ballooning, and later he's got a couple's massage.* Came to mind before I even read the part of OOP's post in which he referred to "our honeymoons" (plural).
Update was posted: https://www.reddit.com/r/AmITheAngel/s/MIJV1X6KIF
Wife is huge AH.