Forbidding your partner from having friends is known to be toxic, so they have to come up with words like “platonic emotional affair” so they can do it and still make their partner the bad guy for daring to have friends.
Yeah, it’s seems like such obvious manipulation to accuse someone of having an “emotional affair”, especially when some of the “signs” are shit like… being too close to your friend and confiding in your friend (like basic friendship shit).
A “healthy abusive relationship” is when people talk about how their partner does nothing to help around the house or to take care of the kids but then say “but they’re a great person and parent.” Are they? Really?
I've been given shit over "You wrote this laundry list of terrible shit your supposed partner has done to you. How could you possibly think they're a great person?"
Almost everything I've seen described as an emotional affair on reddit sounds like a normal friendship. People who think people can't be genuine friends with people of the gender(s) they're attracted to are just projecting their own inability to see those people as full people with value beyond sex and dating.
They literally said in a comment that a platonic love is a “romantic love without them loving you back”. I think they heard the term platonic in a movie and never bothered learning what it means.
That person is crazy tbh, they said it meant that in their language, I asked what language was that because afaik platonic means the same in all, and they said they aren’t going to open themselves to racist comments
I went and looked at their profile to see if I could get hints to what “their language” might be and discovered all they do is comment on AITA-type subs giving relationship advice. They’re basically the perfect example of “don’t think people telling you what to do in your relationship know shit about shit.”
lol you deserve some flair from this whole incident!
If you go to the flair page, you should see “edit” in the upper right-hand corner. you can make your own custom flair there.
https://preview.redd.it/ncy6vqig5l7d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7c4ac85c88b67e05289fe799757d14c102f57bd
Also if this is a thing like... What do bisexuals do, just not have friends at all? Otherwise they're having a "platonic emotional affair" with EVERYONE.
I always bring this up to the “men and women can’t be friends!” brigade, and they always either don’t respond or just splutter, “Well, that’s different!”
I think a lot of the people who believe that men and women will inevitably have an affair if they ever even have a private conversation alone together are also the people who lowkey don’t really believe in bisexuality at best or are outright homophobic at worst, though.
I brought it up once and the person who responded to me said “you know that’s different. Men want to have sex with every woman.”
They don’t really believe bisexual women feel the same level of sexual attraction to women that hetero men do. They think it’s a performance.
It's always bugged me that teenage boys and incels can't imagine spending time with women for any reason besides sex and can't comprehend not everyone is like that.
My biggest green flag for my now-husband was when he talked about all his female friends, just very naturally and conversationally, when we first met. I was like, “Okay, good, this guy sees women as people, not sex objects.”
Also it's a real impediment to all friendships, because as a straight woman you can only have straight woman friendships, a gay woman can only have gay men friendships, etc, and it just limits social interactions in a way that impedes integration/having friends without the same experiences as you - it's forcing people to be in bubbles that is not healthy. People can't think these thoughts through to their logical conclusion and go "yes that is a society I want to live in"?
I'm so dumb I didn't even catch it until I read the title and went of yeah what the fuck is a platonic emotional affair. An affair is not platonic that's like the whole point.
What a neat sidestep to avoid admitting they’re wrong. Of course in MyCountry™️, platonic means unrequited! If I told you which one, I’d get ~~made fun of for being wrong~~ *hArRaSsEd By RaCiSm!!1*
Reddit when Mike Pence politics: 🤢🤮🤢🤮
Reddit when Mike Pence Rule: 🥰😍🥰😍
For those unfamiliar with the Mike Pence Rule:
>The Modesto Manifesto or Billy Graham rule is a code of conduct among male evangelical Protestant leaders, in which they avoid spending time alone with women to whom they are not married. It is adopted as a display of integrity, a means of avoiding sexual temptation, to avoid any appearance of doing something considered morally objectionable, as well as for avoiding accusations of sexual harassment or assault.
>In 2017, it began to be also called the Mike Pence rule, after the US vice president, a practicing Christian, who also supported the idea.
What's weird to me about this is like ... my wife and I follow the Mike Pence rule incidentally. We don't have friends of the opposite sex, and although we did previously, we don't really meet them anymore.
That's more a byproduct of having two children and having to prioritize our closer friends, but you get the point.
The weird thing to me is that this poster seems to want the enforce the Mike Pence rule on another person's relationship? Fucking bizarre.
So my husband and I have discussed this and agree that it would be weird for him to like, casually hang around 1:1 with a specific woman in his office (it came up bc he found out about an office affair and was like, “and this is why I don’t want even a hint of that on me”). But here’s the thing: I trust him to make the right decision based on each situation, and I know that he and I have a strong relationship and that beyond everything else, we are one another’s best friends.
Honestly? I'd kind of find it weird of my wife hung out with a male friend 1:1. Not really because I'd think she wanted to cheat on me with him, but rather because it would be out of the ordinary.
But with that said, one of my first bosses actually said something that stuck with me. He said that no matter what rules your relationship may have, if someone decides to cheat on you, they'll cheat. It doesn't matter if you're living across the country or in the same house. It doesn't matter if you follow the "no friends of the opposite sex" rule or not. Someone who has decided to commit infidelity will commit infidelity and there's not much you can do to stop it short of locking them up in the basement or something.
This is what I don't understand. Do people think "You're not allowed to meet your opposite-sex friend" is going to dissuade a cheater? "Oh, darn, I was totally going to go spunk all over Jessica's face after we caught up over coffee, but my wife said I can't see her so I suppose my devious plan has been foiled!"? Of course not.
There is, all in all, extremely little you can do to prevent a significant other from cheating. And that's the reason why these little rules people have seem so pointless to me.
And as a woman in a male dominated field, most of my friends have been guys. My husband is shy and self conscious, and sometimes struggles to make friends. So I introduced him to all my friends when we started dating. They thought he was great and swapped contact info. If they want social time, they call me, I grab the spouse and we head for the bbq or whatever. If they want to discuss gear ratios and axels and gummy tires, they call him.
I absolutely believe that men and women can be platonic friends without being stupid. But I'm bi. So if I was the cheating kind, staying away from men wouldn't remove all temptation. I just think cheating is dumb. If you don't have enough respect for your partner to stay faithful, then you shouldn't be with them.
This is how I feel about things like sharing email passwords. You can literally just make another email account to use for cheating? It's not illegal?? 😂
Even aside from friendship, following the Mike Pence rule strictly would mean that if your boss is a woman and she calls you into her office for a private chat, you're supposed to...say no? Bring a chaperone??
Or if you are in a situation where only two people are on duty at the same time, better make sure you never get scheduled with a female coworker! I bet your boss will love that level of pickiness!
It only makes sense in a context where you expect men and women to have completely separate spheres and never interact except for romance.
My dad was a preacher followed this rule somewhat. Like if he had a woman in his office, he left the door open, or if she needed spiritual guidance, he made sure there was another individual that she trusted inside the room as well. But if my mom happened to have a lady from the church over and stepped out of the room, he wouldn’t like freak out or run from the room or anything.
I think this every single time I hear the term "emotional affair" anywhere. I really do hate the assumption in so many heterosexual relationships that opposite gender close friendships are cheating.
Also heteros: why am I so sad when I don't have a partner?
Spoiler: it's because you've decided that a romantic & sexual partner is the only person you should ever be allowed to have any type of real emotional intimacy with. You're putting all your eggs in one basket and then crying every time you drop the the basket and all the eggs break. But you believe that having two baskets would be morally wrong so this will just keep happening to you all your life.
Also: I’ve invested my entire self worth in being seen as desirable by having a partner. I’d rather have a sub-par relationship with someone who’s not that into me than be a single loser.
And also as a married person, sometimes you still have chemistry with other people.... It's important (at least to me) to communicate that you're not interested in anyone besides your partner without being an awkward weirdo.
My go to is just bringing my husband up a lot in conversations lol I mean not complicated but. I've had conversations with other married folks about this issue too. Some insecure ass ppl out there want to mess w relationships and those of us in really good ones are weirded out by it and try to head it off in order to be polite.
I think emotional affairs are bullshit, to be honest. I’m really close to a male friend of mine and we have deep conversations. I care a lot about him. I don’t want to fuck him.
My controversial opinion is that "emotional affairs" are only a risk to your relationship if it sucks. Like if your partner feels like they can't talk to you about things openly, if you're distant and not there for them when they need you, if the emotional connection isn't there, then of course your partner will seek it somewhere else and maybe in that process they'll realize that your relationship is bad and unfulfilling. But if you have a stable & solid base, that just won't happen.
When people worry excessively about "emotional affairs" it always reads as insecurity to me. You know that someone being nice to your partner & listening to their problems could crush the fragile bond you have and instead of putting effort into strengthening the bond you try to prevent it from ever being put to the test.
Concern over "emotional affairs" is definitely borne out of insecurity. And honestly, I'd go as far as to say "emotional cheating" isn't really a thing? Like I guess it can be in very specific situations but typically it's used for control, manipulation, and abuse. Often pushed by religious whackjobs or non-religious people who still want to push high-control relationship principles.
Nah, my dad is a serial emotional cheater. He won’t do it physically, because he’s supposedly above cheating, but he’s got a bad case of wandering eyes and will absolutely find any excuse to say a relationship is bad and encourage a new woman to start flirting.
That, too, though you’ll never convince him of that. The woman who brought about the beginning of the end for him and my mom, though, he was even more blatant about it with her. Always running off to her house if she needed any work done (which is the classic affair trope), and since he’s very religious they’d spend hours on the phone at night discussing the Bible. Meanwhile, mom would ask to pray together and he’d get as far as “precious Heavenly Father, lord,” before dozing.
And, of course, they’d have lunch together at work. Strangely enough, the woman was only free when mom was too busy to join.
My ex was always soooo sure I was up to something nefarious because (gasp!) I have friends who are men. It was about his insecurities but it wasn’t fun.
Now that we’re not together I’ve weirdly not boinked my friends. Because they’re my *friends*.
Omg. This comment is even more unhinged after reading the post! She’s a mutual friend of OOP and his wife and they were texting more because they were talking about a job? That commenter is doing some bizarre projection! Lmao.
As a gay man, I'm imagining the idea of a partner forbidding me having close male friends, which is a stance no reasonable person would defend; yet when it comes to straight couples, it's a fairly common mindset that you aren't *allowed* to have close opposite-sex friends, which is mostly just sad to me.
Yeah, this has stuff has been making it's way around the net for a while, if nothing else all that noise is a reasonable argument for just saying fuck it and fully embracing relationship anarchy.
Emotional affairs (friends) are only a threat to your relationship if it's a relationship in name only.
By that logic, as a bisexual I'm having a "platonic affair" every time I hang out with any of my friends, or end my phone calls to them with "love you, hun". Especially when I hang out with our male friends. And my fiance is cheating when he meets or emails with the women he mentors at work, I guess. Oh, or maybe I should start being paranoid about our friend's 14 year old sister that we tutor and take out to movies sometimes.
New level of dumbass bullshittery just dropped.
idr if it was tumblr or twitter but there was a whole spiel about taking people on platonic dates and platonic hang outs and we were all like… you mean friendship?????
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It's ok to have close friends and I would never ban them but an emotional affair is what George (Ali Wong's husband) was having with Mia (Ali Wong's employee) in the TV show Beef. He told her his deepest thoughts and jacked off to her Instagram photo (boobs). I'm not sure if that qualifies as platonic or not but I would be hurt if my incommunicable boyfriend was *that* close to another woman.
And I'm someone who had to be told we had to cool it because we were too close in a friend relationship and the wife didn't like it. (Definitely platonic, I thought of him as like a brother.)
calling out my fiance for having a gay polyamorous platonic emotional affair (friends)
is this possible to get this as a flair? its perfection
I'm certainly using it as one
Me and you buddy
>buddy Having an affair over Reddit of all things, smh my head
Forbidding your partner from having friends is known to be toxic, so they have to come up with words like “platonic emotional affair” so they can do it and still make their partner the bad guy for daring to have friends.
Yeah, it’s seems like such obvious manipulation to accuse someone of having an “emotional affair”, especially when some of the “signs” are shit like… being too close to your friend and confiding in your friend (like basic friendship shit).
Next time on Reddit: "It's a healthy abusive relationship" "It's a funny humourless joke"
“Healthy Abusive Relationship” sounds perfectly like something you’d come across in an AITA thread.
A “healthy abusive relationship” is when people talk about how their partner does nothing to help around the house or to take care of the kids but then say “but they’re a great person and parent.” Are they? Really?
I've been given shit over "You wrote this laundry list of terrible shit your supposed partner has done to you. How could you possibly think they're a great person?"
That reply is exactly what I think 99% of the time when Reddit teenagers talk about “emotional affairs.”
Most of the time it’s just a normal close friendship and yet redditors come crawling out of the woodwork to screech about cheating
Almost everything I've seen described as an emotional affair on reddit sounds like a normal friendship. People who think people can't be genuine friends with people of the gender(s) they're attracted to are just projecting their own inability to see those people as full people with value beyond sex and dating.
They literally said in a comment that a platonic love is a “romantic love without them loving you back”. I think they heard the term platonic in a movie and never bothered learning what it means.
Yeah somebody has conflated platonic friendship with unrequited love.
That person is crazy tbh, they said it meant that in their language, I asked what language was that because afaik platonic means the same in all, and they said they aren’t going to open themselves to racist comments
I went and looked at their profile to see if I could get hints to what “their language” might be and discovered all they do is comment on AITA-type subs giving relationship advice. They’re basically the perfect example of “don’t think people telling you what to do in your relationship know shit about shit.”
Info: how did you got that flair? I need it
lol you deserve some flair from this whole incident! If you go to the flair page, you should see “edit” in the upper right-hand corner. you can make your own custom flair there. https://preview.redd.it/ncy6vqig5l7d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7c4ac85c88b67e05289fe799757d14c102f57bd
Thanks
That’s what it sounds like, but also…this is no way sounded like unrequited love. (The post is gone now — I should have copied the text 😬)
Also if this is a thing like... What do bisexuals do, just not have friends at all? Otherwise they're having a "platonic emotional affair" with EVERYONE.
I always bring this up to the “men and women can’t be friends!” brigade, and they always either don’t respond or just splutter, “Well, that’s different!” I think a lot of the people who believe that men and women will inevitably have an affair if they ever even have a private conversation alone together are also the people who lowkey don’t really believe in bisexuality at best or are outright homophobic at worst, though.
I brought it up once and the person who responded to me said “you know that’s different. Men want to have sex with every woman.” They don’t really believe bisexual women feel the same level of sexual attraction to women that hetero men do. They think it’s a performance.
It's always bugged me that teenage boys and incels can't imagine spending time with women for any reason besides sex and can't comprehend not everyone is like that.
My biggest green flag for my now-husband was when he talked about all his female friends, just very naturally and conversationally, when we first met. I was like, “Okay, good, this guy sees women as people, not sex objects.”
Also probably the same people who think that friendship and sexual attraction are mutually exclusive.
Also it's a real impediment to all friendships, because as a straight woman you can only have straight woman friendships, a gay woman can only have gay men friendships, etc, and it just limits social interactions in a way that impedes integration/having friends without the same experiences as you - it's forcing people to be in bubbles that is not healthy. People can't think these thoughts through to their logical conclusion and go "yes that is a society I want to live in"?
 Sorry, no friends for bisexuals! it’s ALL cheating!
I'm so dumb I didn't even catch it until I read the title and went of yeah what the fuck is a platonic emotional affair. An affair is not platonic that's like the whole point.
https://preview.redd.it/8fb1aiglti7d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6df9520128173f83688a2303e0ad4328e0df77e0 💀💀💀
What a neat sidestep to avoid admitting they’re wrong. Of course in MyCountry™️, platonic means unrequited! If I told you which one, I’d get ~~made fun of for being wrong~~ *hArRaSsEd By RaCiSm!!1*
Reddit when Mike Pence politics: 🤢🤮🤢🤮 Reddit when Mike Pence Rule: 🥰😍🥰😍 For those unfamiliar with the Mike Pence Rule: >The Modesto Manifesto or Billy Graham rule is a code of conduct among male evangelical Protestant leaders, in which they avoid spending time alone with women to whom they are not married. It is adopted as a display of integrity, a means of avoiding sexual temptation, to avoid any appearance of doing something considered morally objectionable, as well as for avoiding accusations of sexual harassment or assault. >In 2017, it began to be also called the Mike Pence rule, after the US vice president, a practicing Christian, who also supported the idea.
Literally yes. I wish you could post images in replies on those subs bc I would have one locked & loaded with the drake meme for the Mike Pence rule.
What's weird to me about this is like ... my wife and I follow the Mike Pence rule incidentally. We don't have friends of the opposite sex, and although we did previously, we don't really meet them anymore. That's more a byproduct of having two children and having to prioritize our closer friends, but you get the point. The weird thing to me is that this poster seems to want the enforce the Mike Pence rule on another person's relationship? Fucking bizarre.
So my husband and I have discussed this and agree that it would be weird for him to like, casually hang around 1:1 with a specific woman in his office (it came up bc he found out about an office affair and was like, “and this is why I don’t want even a hint of that on me”). But here’s the thing: I trust him to make the right decision based on each situation, and I know that he and I have a strong relationship and that beyond everything else, we are one another’s best friends.
Honestly? I'd kind of find it weird of my wife hung out with a male friend 1:1. Not really because I'd think she wanted to cheat on me with him, but rather because it would be out of the ordinary. But with that said, one of my first bosses actually said something that stuck with me. He said that no matter what rules your relationship may have, if someone decides to cheat on you, they'll cheat. It doesn't matter if you're living across the country or in the same house. It doesn't matter if you follow the "no friends of the opposite sex" rule or not. Someone who has decided to commit infidelity will commit infidelity and there's not much you can do to stop it short of locking them up in the basement or something. This is what I don't understand. Do people think "You're not allowed to meet your opposite-sex friend" is going to dissuade a cheater? "Oh, darn, I was totally going to go spunk all over Jessica's face after we caught up over coffee, but my wife said I can't see her so I suppose my devious plan has been foiled!"? Of course not. There is, all in all, extremely little you can do to prevent a significant other from cheating. And that's the reason why these little rules people have seem so pointless to me.
And as a woman in a male dominated field, most of my friends have been guys. My husband is shy and self conscious, and sometimes struggles to make friends. So I introduced him to all my friends when we started dating. They thought he was great and swapped contact info. If they want social time, they call me, I grab the spouse and we head for the bbq or whatever. If they want to discuss gear ratios and axels and gummy tires, they call him. I absolutely believe that men and women can be platonic friends without being stupid. But I'm bi. So if I was the cheating kind, staying away from men wouldn't remove all temptation. I just think cheating is dumb. If you don't have enough respect for your partner to stay faithful, then you shouldn't be with them.
This is how I feel about things like sharing email passwords. You can literally just make another email account to use for cheating? It's not illegal?? 😂
Even aside from friendship, following the Mike Pence rule strictly would mean that if your boss is a woman and she calls you into her office for a private chat, you're supposed to...say no? Bring a chaperone?? Or if you are in a situation where only two people are on duty at the same time, better make sure you never get scheduled with a female coworker! I bet your boss will love that level of pickiness! It only makes sense in a context where you expect men and women to have completely separate spheres and never interact except for romance.
>avoiding accusations of sexual harassment or assault This feels like when a werewolf chains themself to a tree before a full moon.
My dad was a preacher followed this rule somewhat. Like if he had a woman in his office, he left the door open, or if she needed spiritual guidance, he made sure there was another individual that she trusted inside the room as well. But if my mom happened to have a lady from the church over and stepped out of the room, he wouldn’t like freak out or run from the room or anything.
" In my language we use platonic for romantic love without them loving you back." Wut
Do we get to put this on the bingo card, that in MyCountry™️ this is a thing but “English Is Not My First Language”™️?
I think this every single time I hear the term "emotional affair" anywhere. I really do hate the assumption in so many heterosexual relationships that opposite gender close friendships are cheating.
Also heteros: why am I so sad when I don't have a partner? Spoiler: it's because you've decided that a romantic & sexual partner is the only person you should ever be allowed to have any type of real emotional intimacy with. You're putting all your eggs in one basket and then crying every time you drop the the basket and all the eggs break. But you believe that having two baskets would be morally wrong so this will just keep happening to you all your life.
Also: I’ve invested my entire self worth in being seen as desirable by having a partner. I’d rather have a sub-par relationship with someone who’s not that into me than be a single loser.
And also as a married person, sometimes you still have chemistry with other people.... It's important (at least to me) to communicate that you're not interested in anyone besides your partner without being an awkward weirdo. My go to is just bringing my husband up a lot in conversations lol I mean not complicated but. I've had conversations with other married folks about this issue too. Some insecure ass ppl out there want to mess w relationships and those of us in really good ones are weirded out by it and try to head it off in order to be polite.
I think emotional affairs are bullshit, to be honest. I’m really close to a male friend of mine and we have deep conversations. I care a lot about him. I don’t want to fuck him.
My controversial opinion is that "emotional affairs" are only a risk to your relationship if it sucks. Like if your partner feels like they can't talk to you about things openly, if you're distant and not there for them when they need you, if the emotional connection isn't there, then of course your partner will seek it somewhere else and maybe in that process they'll realize that your relationship is bad and unfulfilling. But if you have a stable & solid base, that just won't happen. When people worry excessively about "emotional affairs" it always reads as insecurity to me. You know that someone being nice to your partner & listening to their problems could crush the fragile bond you have and instead of putting effort into strengthening the bond you try to prevent it from ever being put to the test.
It’s like you’re inside my brain! This is totally what I think.
Oh no, that sounds like an emotional affair! /S
Telepathic affairs oh my!
Concern over "emotional affairs" is definitely borne out of insecurity. And honestly, I'd go as far as to say "emotional cheating" isn't really a thing? Like I guess it can be in very specific situations but typically it's used for control, manipulation, and abuse. Often pushed by religious whackjobs or non-religious people who still want to push high-control relationship principles.
Agreed. I'm a straight woman, my BFF is a bi dude. We've discussed all sorts of things together and there's zero romantic chemistry.
Nah, my dad is a serial emotional cheater. He won’t do it physically, because he’s supposedly above cheating, but he’s got a bad case of wandering eyes and will absolutely find any excuse to say a relationship is bad and encourage a new woman to start flirting.
That doesn’t sound emotional at all. He just sounds like a lech.
That, too, though you’ll never convince him of that. The woman who brought about the beginning of the end for him and my mom, though, he was even more blatant about it with her. Always running off to her house if she needed any work done (which is the classic affair trope), and since he’s very religious they’d spend hours on the phone at night discussing the Bible. Meanwhile, mom would ask to pray together and he’d get as far as “precious Heavenly Father, lord,” before dozing. And, of course, they’d have lunch together at work. Strangely enough, the woman was only free when mom was too busy to join.
I’m sorry for your mom. What a shit! The woman is also a shit.
My ex was always soooo sure I was up to something nefarious because (gasp!) I have friends who are men. It was about his insecurities but it wasn’t fun. Now that we’re not together I’ve weirdly not boinked my friends. Because they’re my *friends*.
Omg. This comment is even more unhinged after reading the post! She’s a mutual friend of OOP and his wife and they were texting more because they were talking about a job? That commenter is doing some bizarre projection! Lmao.
Stares in friendless bisexuality
Asexual here, and I'm confused. I think I'm being called a slut.
As a gay man, I'm imagining the idea of a partner forbidding me having close male friends, which is a stance no reasonable person would defend; yet when it comes to straight couples, it's a fairly common mindset that you aren't *allowed* to have close opposite-sex friends, which is mostly just sad to me.
Yeah, this has stuff has been making it's way around the net for a while, if nothing else all that noise is a reasonable argument for just saying fuck it and fully embracing relationship anarchy. Emotional affairs (friends) are only a threat to your relationship if it's a relationship in name only.
By that logic, as a bisexual I'm having a "platonic affair" every time I hang out with any of my friends, or end my phone calls to them with "love you, hun". Especially when I hang out with our male friends. And my fiance is cheating when he meets or emails with the women he mentors at work, I guess. Oh, or maybe I should start being paranoid about our friend's 14 year old sister that we tutor and take out to movies sometimes. New level of dumbass bullshittery just dropped.
Just by reading this, I’ve hooked up with everyone else who’s read this. I’m exhausted.
Taking "platonic emotional affair" as a flair now. This is peak AITA
I’m so proud of the flair this has inspired lol
did anyone save the post?
No, and there’s no automod on RA 😫 I’m sorry!
Username checks out
idr if it was tumblr or twitter but there was a whole spiel about taking people on platonic dates and platonic hang outs and we were all like… you mean friendship?????
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It's ok to have close friends and I would never ban them but an emotional affair is what George (Ali Wong's husband) was having with Mia (Ali Wong's employee) in the TV show Beef. He told her his deepest thoughts and jacked off to her Instagram photo (boobs). I'm not sure if that qualifies as platonic or not but I would be hurt if my incommunicable boyfriend was *that* close to another woman. And I'm someone who had to be told we had to cool it because we were too close in a friend relationship and the wife didn't like it. (Definitely platonic, I thought of him as like a brother.)