Whenever I pee at the urinal I make sure to look over the divider and compliment the man next to me while looking into his eyes
This is what we really want
Imagine a world where we could compliment eachothers dicks lol & everybody brought eachother up when we felt "down" lolol.
..sigh I've been watching too many alternate universe theory videos at 3am..
There was a local bar with a piss trough in a very small bathroom. Only 2-3 people could stand in the bathroom at once. I made it a point to shout “nice dick” whenever I went in and there were people in there. It was always a hit lmao. I dunno man dudes should compliment dicks more even if we don’t really even know what that dick do
Kinda reminds me of the time somebody at a bar was pissing at a urinal with his pants all the way down to his ankles. The amount of restraint it took me to not slap his ass was huge. But at the same time wouldn't want to touch a random dude's ass at a bar urinal.
All I managed was a "nice cheeks bro".
I've had at least one person say this to me literally every time I've worn my fanny pack in public. I like short gym shorts but they lack storage space, so, fanny pack... and, apparently, a nice dick.
I'm always reminded of that scene in dumb & dumber where they both ooo & aaah a couple passing by saying "look at the buns on that" "he must work out" 🤣
Because a lot of guys lift but just don’t have good physiques. Speaking from experience you’ll get compliments from guys for being big but women will talk to you like you’re an obese cat.
This is so true. All the built guys feel each other's muscles up at the gym. At first, I thought it was weird, but my personal trainer assured me it was normal.
I mean it’s not surprising. If a lady started to hit the gym and developed a nice ass and legs, I don’t think I would go up to her and be like “nice ass bro”, that would be a bit creepy lmao. But I’m sure another girl wouldn’t be as apprehensive to give out a similar compliment to that girl
Literally thinking about this the other day. I was scrawny af now I’m pretty muscular. I have had women comment on my physique. But only if I’m intimately involved with them. Now it’s just men telling me. I had a friend just yesterday at a party tell me he was jealous of my body lol
It is way more common for the same sex as you to give you a compliment since neither of you would think of it as anything other than a compliment.
A woman saying something to a guy would come off as flirty and the same if we switched the role
Oh 100% I totally get why it’s that way. I also will add I catch women checking me out wayyy more. But it totally makes sense why they aren’t commenting on male bodies without an already established relationship
I think the apt analogy is like boob size. Being a skinny guy is like being flat chested. After you put on LEAN muscle, it’s like reaching a D cup. Girls start to check you out but they will rarely say it publicly.
Same deal as you, I get em both. The men are far more complimentary though so I enjoy that attention, women LOVE feeling me up and it’s so much more fun and easy to flirt with them and make them laugh. Women are the goal but a nice compliment on my ass or arms by a dude is still a net confidence boost
It will come a lot through compliments on your outfits. Since I got in better shape I've had a decent number of women compliment my shirts, even when they're just regular patterned button-ups.
Almost no women will directly compliment a man's body, to the point that the couple times it did happen to me it was honestly a little off-putting.
The thing I notice is that women touch you more, not obviously but stuff like putting their hand on you to steady themselves if they stumble and so on.
Never have I related to a comment so much. Always been a skinny dude, but years of manual labour has given me a toned physique and just the other day I went to see my dentist only for this 60+ year old man to tell me “wow you’re a fit young man”. Definitely nice to hear but wouldn’t mind hearing it from the opposing sex once in a while!
It’s funny how that works, I was a huge meat head obsessed with bodybuilding a couple years ago, had a fairly decent physique but now rocking a dad bod and my SO fucking loves it.
Yeah being jacked and depressed is better than being just plain depressed. Plus I lift like a maniac even at 45 to combat depression because if I didn't, I'd probably spiral.
Not OP, but for me it helps curb anxiety, helps me be more present, be more confident, and I sleep better. Also it’s a good stress reliever after a tough day.
I can't remember where I saw this, but I always thought it was great phrasing, something like: working out is *not necessarily* an antidepressant, but NOT working out most certainly *is* a depressant.
Results are individual but on average from a brain chemical standpoint. It releases different chemicals that your brain may be lacking either due to depression and/or other mental disorders/illnesses. Dopamine when you are doing it. Serotonin (if I remember correctly) when you finish. It also causes cortisol buildup while doing it also, potentially allowing you to relax after your body comes down from the fight or flight response if you exert yourself hard enough (which may also help curb anxiety). Those are just some ways. I hope it gives you some ideas. Though it doesn’t make severe issues go away and professional help is still very much recommended if they don’t go almost all the way away by exercising.
Exercise improves your physical health and gives you more energy, which can help combat the exhaustion and fatigue from depression. It also releases endorphins, which can help with your mood.
Exercise also improves your mental health in several ways. Sticking to a program helps keep you on a schedule, forces you to do something positive even when you don't want to, and gives you short-term goals to reach as you work toward a larger long-term goal.
Getting more fit can also snowball in a positive way — your body starts looking better, so now you start caring more about hygiene, shaving, haircuts, clothing, etc.
And going to the gym can help you make new friends, which can help with loneliness.
I run obsessively. When I have to take a break for whatever reason it really doesn't take long for me to feel noticeably worse. Doing regular exercise is so great for your mental state.
I kept up lifting while I was depressed most of last year, I figured that I didn't need to be happy to work out and that I could keep getting stronger even if I was depressed. Tried to keep the same attitude about working on creative projects too. It was a net win overall because now I'm doing better I don't have to rebuild those habits from scratch.
I live for the endorphins I get after a good pump. I noticed my self esteem and mental health takes a dip if I don’t go to the gym for a bit.
Also, as much as we all say “gym is my therapy”, it ain’t no real therapy. No shame in going to talk to someone
Bloom is handsome, period. He’d just be handsome and yoked if he got jacked, eg. Henry Cavill circa his role in The Tudors vs. after he bulked up for Superman, The Witcher.
No, but I was skinny and after losing weight and gaining muscle, my jawline and cheeks are definitely more chiseled than before.
Fat might not look super obvious on skinny people but it is still there.
Funny, I think my face has actually gotten worse.
Although I bulked for the past 2 years. Went from 5'8 120 lbs to 160 lbs. I went from no muscle no fat to a decent amount of muscle and some fat.
My one good defining feature back when I was skinny was I had a really good jawline. I'm hoping once I start the cut and get lean I'll have that jawline again.
If you lost the jawline, you bulked too hard. 40 pounds in 2 years isn't bad, but if done naturally, you're looking at about 60% of that weight being muscle (at best) and the rest being split between water weight and visceral/subcutaneous fat. The water weight tends to be the worst for the jawline, and the first to leave when you cut. Just make sure your cut isn't just calorie-restriction. Dreamer bulks and starvation cuts are the fastest ways to look worse than you started.
Seriously. I used to be under weight. After several years in the military, I gained muscle mass and would go, "damn I'm hot" when looking in the mirror. In basic training, some guy said I had a rat face and I'm starting to think he was right.
As a man who has pulled teeth for compliments his entire young adult life: no, I don't think I could receive enough compliments from now until the end of my life to reach a level that I consider to be "too much".
Right? I really do get why women can feel uncomfortable with excessive attention from men. But the opposite end of that spectrum is just *soul-crushing*.
A lot of gym goers suffer from body dysmorphia and still don't think they look great even if they are in fantastic shape.
So no, compliments never get old lol.
People genuinely started treating me better in all kinds of ways. Friends start noticing you and try to “be like you”. You create a more magnetic aura around you that you’ve never felt before. Customer service people will try to help you as well. It is truly life changing. I suggest anyone who is thinking about it to just pull the trigger and start working out. It’s a lot of discipline and dedication but worth all the time you put into it
I agree, I went from 400 lbs 10 years ago to 215 with slight muscle. The different ways people treat you, even people that were being nice but there is just like an extra level they go to now is insane. None of my friends believe me when I say this, but any former fat to skinny person will know exactly what I'm talking about,.
i also noticed this, people who weren’t particularly nice to me in highschool now see me in the gym when i swing by my hometown and they act super nice to me and idk how to feel about it, im glad your nice to me but it took me getting jacked to gain some respect ? lol
The discipline is the biggest gain from learning to consistently work out imo. I was always very lazy and undisciplined about pretty much everything: food, homework, sleep, house chores. Learning some discipline helps so much with all that. I think about what I eat and how much every day now, I try to get to sleep on time so my brain can rest and the muscles can build up plenty, I prioritize chores and homework better over just flopping down and playing video games or watching tv. I still give myself the weekend to relax more and have something sweet so I’m not constantly craving stuff, but I don’t let myself go through a whole carton of ice cream and a bag of Oreos in one night anymore.
I started going to the gym for 4 days a week. Its been a few months now...I can't say my discipline in any other aspect of my life has improved the slightest bit. If there was a lesson to be had here, I never got it.
> Guys who have gone from skinny to big and muscular,
I went from skinny-fat, to toned/muscular
> how has it changed your life?
Incredibly, where do I start?
1. Any clothes look good on me. Period
2. I feel great!
3. I eat a lot of great food, 2,600-3,000 cal/day
4. The satisfaction of deadlifting >400 lbs is nice
5. Women dig it. Really. It's very flattering to get the attention.
I'm a lady, but I really noticed the difference in my clothes. I don't need expensive clothes, and I don't need to watch YouTube videos on what to wear. When I'm toned it all just *works*.
Yes about the not needing expensive clothes! Regular clothes from Walmart (no shade to Walmart, but they just not known for their fashion) will look great on a toned and fit body
Getting a sewing machine and learning to alter shirts is a game changer. Anything from a $9.99 shitter dress shirt from Walmart to a $30 Charles Tyrwhitt on sale looks fantastic after I take the sides in. They'd look even better once I figure out how to do darts in the back. I even alter cheap t-shirts to fit better.
I haven't needed to alter pants because straight fit pants just look like tight ass skinny jeans on me. Can't even fit my legs through actual skinny jeans.
3. Is fucking underrated and underdiscussed. It's so good.
If you're a fat person then your maintenance calories are actually increased because having extra fat passively burns 3 calories per lb, and muscle burns 6~.
I lost a lot of fat and gained a good amount of muscle simultaneously and have increased my maintenance calories from my starting point and it rules. It's ofc not just due to the passive factor, but also the active factor. If you can become more active in ways you enjoy and can sustain then you're increasing your active and passive maintenance calories which allows you to eat more in a deficit or at maintenance.
If I simply focused on fat loss and no muscle gain I'd be permanently on a pretty massive deficit diet when compared to my active muscled version of myself. I find it so much more sustainable and enjoyable than a pure fat loss focus. My mental health surely would have improved with a pure fat loss approach but it is so much better with lifting and light cardio added.
not me, but my buddy went from not working out basically ever… to getting pretty fucking jacked. He even fixed his posture, which gave him a few extra CMs in height. He's pretty much the same nerdy guy as he always was but now he has sex A LOT. Edit: I’d say he went from 179 CM to 182 CM and probably 70KG to 90 KG.
Confidence got me laid far more than looks ever did. There are tons of socially awkward shredded guys that don't get why their funny, chubby friend is more successful with women.
I think thats everyones fantasy really. A hot girl who is also nerdy and sweet? Equally amazing. Most people arent into the classic overly cocky gym bros or gym gal with brand clothes
I was 165lbs graduating high school back in 2015. I was a scrawny little black kid. Joined the Army, snd I got to 225lbs and the best shape of my life after a couple of years. I was more confident, generally people don't fuck with you, and women apparently love muscle. I'm down to 210 now. People always seem to compliment you as well. Overall, fantastic. You feel better about yourself 100%!
It’s hilarious that 165 is scrawny to some people. I graduated high school in 2016 at 5’10 and 110 lbs. I sat around 125lbs the past few years and joined a gym this year to try and bulk up. I just hit my goal of 140 a week ago. Going to go for 150 now
I look back it, and I absolutely had very little muscle on myself and whatnot. Im just calling myself scrawny compared to how I am now. I was 5'10 in HS as well. Congrats on hitting your goals tho🤘🤘
What exercises did you find helped the most?
Was also a scrawny black kid, about 150 or so. Now I'm 185 and go to the gym 6 days a week for the past 2 years but I feel like I've hit a wall in terms of growth. I'm still getting stronger for sure but I feel like weightwise, I'm stagnant
People seem to love deadlifts. But I have noticed my body changes the quickest from doing weighted Pull Ups and weighted Ring Dips. Addicted to those two movements currently.
Those 2 are definitely addicting. Deadlifts are great too, but I can't go over a certain weight anymore due to my back. Unfortunately, same with squats. Damn Army ruined my body
What kind of routine are you doing?
Personally I find generic push / pull routines with a dedicated leg day in the middle most effective. 2x push, 2x pull, 1x legs and the 6th day is whatever I’m actively trying to work on.
Sleep is also super important, and cutting back on drinking too 1 night a week at most helped me get over the plateau. Drinking kills your gains.
I personally find having an apple watch to track calories incredibly helpful, basically any health orientated smart watch will do the same thing. Having a job where i’m of my feet and moving all day and going to the gym 6 days a week made my maintenance calories significantly higher than I thought, obviously if you’re trying to bulk you should be slightly over that.
Former skinny guy here, turned gym bro. 5’10, currently weighing 175 down from 185. Previously walked around at 130-140 for most of my life.
If you’re asking to see if I got more girls? Gonna be honest and say I got an ok amount of girls back when I was skinny, and probably got hit on/ a few more “looks” back then. I think girls may find me a bit more intimidating now? Or I’m just uglier, totally real possibility.
Its made me more confident definitely. Not the most confident guy, but more confident. Other than that, the only real difference is my mom telling me I have muscle, and people who I haven’t seen in a few years going “wow you got big”. Just don’t make it your whole personality like I did
Honestly bro, it’s one of those you just gotta lock in things. Track everything you eat using MyFitnessPal.
For me, it didn’t happen until I finally moved out and was FORCED to cook my own meals. I never cooked a thing in my life when I lived with my parents, so when I got my own home I decided I wasn’t gonna eat McDonald’s everyday but cook my own meals.
Did it suck? Yeah man. To this day my meals taste like shit but I got through it. I’m luckily at the point now where I’ve been consistent so long I can be more lenient with my diet and still have an impressive physique.
Might be a weird suggestion, but try out something like hello fresh for like a month. I learned a lot of basic cooking skills from doing that and just kinda paid attention to why they suggest cooking things a certain way. My meals taste much better since I've learned how to cook and I actually get compliments from people now. That chicken and rice can taste good haha.
Basically I cooked things too hot and didn't know what ingredients went well with what.
1000%
You see people say here on Reddit - and I also have a lot of friends who claim the same - how you turn 30-40 years old and you start getting knee and back pain. I'm in my late 30's and I don't have a single bit of it; I attribute it to working out most of my life since I was in my early 20s. I don't even workout a lot either - just 3 or so days a week and definitely go without working out at all for a week or so every now and then. I definitely have a small belly and wouldn't say I look fit, but my casual lifting and running has me feeling exactly how I felt in my early 20s.
At 5'9", went from about 125lb most of my life to about 155lb at my peak. The bulk of the change took place over a year and a half or so. Saw significant changes in my career.
Obviously there are some other confounding factors, but I don't believe it was a total coincidence that I went from a reasonably well respected individual contributor to managing managers shortly thereafter. It's evident that people treat me completely differently in our in person interactions and then that confidence compounds.
See also - slightly overdressing for a casual workplace.
I always wear a suit for job interviews and so far I've had good success in them. My normal outfits get almost no compliments and I get compliments every day when I'm wearing a suit, to the point where my confidence skyrockets to borderline cocky, which helps in job interviews. Night and day difference compared to 23-year-old scrawny me in an oversized outdated suit from the clearance rack.
I feel good about myself. I like what I see in the mirror.
I have a hobby/pursuit I’m passionate about that I can put a lot of effort into.
I’m strong, which is nice when I do something athletic or physical.
I get men’s respect more easily.
I get a lot more attention from women. (Yes, really. I know a lot of people online will say getting jacked won’t help with women. It absolutely will; it’s just not *quite* as straightforward as “muscles = sex.”)
I’ll never forget I was on a train removing my luggage from the overhead storage. This woman was checking me out and I was gassed. All of a sudden, the train gives a massive shake and the luggage above my head makes me lose my balance. I never seen someone lose interest so quickly.
People start being weirdly honest with you as if you aren't the same person. My grandparents told me they always thought I was gay before I got in shape. Like, not sure how the two are related but whatever. Only one of us didn't die of old-age yet so who's laughing now grandma!
Weirdly, the better I started looking, the more other males suggested I was homosexual.
The ladies have always had fondness for the cheerful cute guy I suppose I always was. But ever since I’m fit like Christian Bale in American Psycho, other random dudes tend to somehow hint I’m not competing with them for the women. Its a pattern. Makes me smirk every time
So mines not exactly what you're asking but I figured it'd be helpful to say anyway.
So I've been super skinny, fat and not necessarily muscular but toned and in very good shape. For me when I was super skinny I felt like an alien, I didn't feel bad, I was still healthy but I didn't feel good in myself.
When I was fat I had absolutely no self esteem, no confidence, felt shit in myself constantly and didn't want to leave the house. I actually ate even more when I was fat because of comfort eating and not wanting to do anything so made it worse. Not fun, people judge you instantly, taken less seriously and can't do as much physically.
When I was in great shape and toned, I had lots of confidence, I felt great in myself, I was way more motivated and active, I was treated alot better and people took me seriously. Also I actually enjoyed clothes shopping for the first time ever because things looked good on me. I received genuine compliments and it was by far the best period ofy life.
In short, being fit and having some definition is great, being skinny kinda sucks but at least you're kinda healthy. Being fat I hated and sucks so much.
Unfortunately for me, after a long period in and out of hospital and a bunch of mental health stuff, I'm back to being a blob, so I'm in the painfully slow process of losing that weight again, and it's awful. None of my new clothes fit anymore, lost my confidence and basically just can't do anywhere near as much as I use to. But if I stick at things I should be back to my good weight in about 3-4 months. So wish me luck.
Holy moly there is a difference.
I’ve been fit my whole life (mostly). Marathons, triathlons.
The number of compliments I got over that time: zero. Other than a few “nice shirt” type ones, but nothing about ME specifically.
After some injuries I couldn’t do as much cardio, so I shifted to more weights. My shoulders are more broad now, My arms/shoulders/back look much better.
I’ve gotten SO MANY compliments in the last 8 months or so. I’m not a young guy either. I’m not exaggerating when I say I’ve gotten more compliments in the last few months than I have in my entire life combined.
Obviously people think that I look better. The secondary benefit though… all my clothes look WAY better on me than they did before. It’s like a free wardrobe upgrade because everything fits and hangs and looks better.
I vaguely knew that upper body improvements would look good but… oh my god, I wish I had known this years ago.
It’s not like I even work out that much more! I just swapped a lot of cardio and some weight for a lot of weight and some cardio.
I went from a stick when I was a teen, to kinda muscular but skinny fat (also poorly fitting clothes, bad posture and awful haircuts), to very lean/muscular with a chiseled V-taper - better style, nicer clothes that fit, a fitting haircut and taller (6’2). It took me around a year of consistent, strict dieting to get to this level. Although I had been working out for around 10 years, I never stuck to dieting which led to me being skinny fat with some muscle.
Where do I start? Self esteem and confidence goes through the roof once you have a command and discipline of your diet + exercise routine. I get a lot of attention from women, and when I have conversations I get prolonged eye contact + smiles. I’ve also noticed I get more respect from peers and people give me the benefit of the doubt in workplace/social settings.
Also being strong and eating healthy just feels fucking good. I have energy all the time and no issues with sleep.
10/10 would recommend. It has made my life significantly better in every possible way. M
Such a gradual process over so many years it’s impossible to tell.
A girl at school when I was like that 11/12 put her hands around my upper arm and exclaimed how skinny it was. Bought a set of dumbbells shortly after.
I dunno how tall I was by that point but I reached my current height (6ft 1) by like year 6 (12/13) whilst being very skinny, probably like 60kg if that.
I was very skinny, 135lb at 5' 11", you could see my ribs and all, felt insecure and decided to fix it when I was 19 y/o. Now three years later, I'm still pretty lean at 155lb, but all the weight I have gained is basically muscle and I've also gained confidence since then. You want to be the most fit you can be, it will help immensely with your mental well-being.
Great to see a ton of positive posts here but I’m gonna state some of the negatives from going to 150 and scrawny to 230 and built.
Body always hurts
Became more insecure. The thing people don’t tell you is the day you start lifting you will never be big enough in your own eyes.
Spend way more money of food and supplements.
Can’t enjoy the food I used to as much as I’d like because you’re way more aware of what’s in them.
You get tons of compliments. Let me explain why this is a negative a little bit when younger. The compliments really only come from other gym bros and not girls like you would expect. As a 31 year old who is married I definitely appreciate the bro compliment but as a 21 year old I thought it was definitely weird.
You can’t find dress clothes that will fit unless you drop$$ on custom tailored clothing. The body of the shirt may fit but your neck are arms will get circulation cut off. Oh you found one that the neck and arms fit, well the rest of the shirt is gonna drown you and go down to your knees.
Your free time gets taken up by going to the gym. Again not a bad thing but if I never started lifting I’d definitely be a lot more productive in other aspects.
You get f***ed with more when out. For the most part if your built people won’t try to start anything but I’ve seen it more at the bar guys get liquid courage want want to challenge “the big guy at the bar”. I’ve had more issues with that being built that when I was small.
Overall though the pros have outweighed cons and I absolutely do not regret putting priority on my fitness and body.
Sounds like this balance might no longer be serving your life. I used to be a lot more invested in lifting and martial arts, and later on down the road I started to experience these exact symptoms. I dialed back and did some work on myself, and found out that I was not loving myself properly and unconditionally.
It’s sort of becomes your normal when you are disciplined to think that these things are a trade for being in good shape and healthy. I am starting disagree with that more and more every day. For context I have been a professional personal trainer for 10 years and I’m now going into nursing as a profession.
The gym should be an escape not a cage!
If your body always hurts, you're doing something wrong. You also sound like you do not have an entirely healthy relationship with lifting and building muscle, which is more of a personal thing than a consequence of achieving a significant level of hypertrophy.
- I feel confident, which has translated to improvements in almost all aspects of life. I have less anxiety, am better socially, can converse better with strangers, and i feel comfortable being myself when many others may feel embarrassment (note: this should not require being ultra fit, but nevertheless that is where I initially gained the confidence).
- People respect you for fitness and use you for motivation. This is my absolute favorite because I love to be a positive role model. After my last competition, I’ve had six friends that wanted to try competing as well so we are all prepping together now for next year.
- You get compliments often from men, and on occasion female strangers will also compliment.
- you benefit from the halo effect, so others will treat you better and you will be perceived as more like able. This has been very helpful in my school, where lots of our grades are based on subjective evaluations
- I can attract women much easier now, at this point I can have multiple women in a rotation which is something I could have never done when I was younger. With that said, a rock hard body can only help you so much in this department, you need to be on your game elsewhere too (social success, job, looks, personality, etc).
Other men treat you differently.
There’s more “respect” or at least less disrespectful behavior towards you. They are less likely to try to intimidate you.
So going from a skinny kid who was bullied it was a nice change. It’s not so useful as an adult because there is a lot less of it that goes on.
I will say that a consequence of that is a bit of confidence but muscle doesn’t make you a better fighter or protect you from a sucker punch so it’s really just a feeling.
People look at you more while you workout and sometimes copy you or ask you questions. It’s fine if you like the attention but it’s also uncomfortable if you catch them doing it and you just want to focus on your workout.
I’d also say the world is a little less comfortable.
Sitting in tight airplane seats sucks a bit more than it used to.
This is awkward to say - but larger thighs means more cramped space between the legs which can be uncomfortable if you don’t have enough legroom.
You are also more limited in what styles of clothes look good on you. There are a lot of clothes that just look clownish on a larger muscular frame.
I know that every dude who is thinking about going to the gym is really reading the answers to this post looking for that guy who tells them how he became 100x more popular with women and gets laid all the time now… but the reality is that being bigger and more muscular is not the key to that.
Being somewhat muscular but defined is much more useful in that way. being an absolute unit only attracts women with that particular type and will get you more attention from other guys who idolize the big bodybuilder type.
Lean with some lines is where it’s at if you want more side glances from women but there comes a point where being too shredded is overboard to women who don’t want to have to put up with the lifestyle and expectations for themselves that often come with someone who trains at that level.
i think my confidence went up but also went down because yes i got jacked and i gained a lot of muscle but i also fell in love with the actual sport of bodybuilding so all i do is look in the mirror and criticize my physique as far as what i need to work on what needs more balance to bring that flow and what not. but i take my shirt off and wear sleeveless shirts to places i wouldn’t usually do so at. i’ve also noticed people who didn’t really talk to me in highschool act like my friend now
Went from 6’1 145 in college to about 200 now (6ish years). Ton of differences but most come from the habit changes and less the actual physical changes.
- Satisfaction and drive to improve my physical health and appearance has taken the place of lots of my more unhealthy urges (drugs, partying, excessive gaming/other unhealthy distractions). Id argue it’s easier to trick your brain into rewarding physical activity if you have a vice you’re looking to move away from, but in general just finding an activity that fits your body is very rewarding. Once you find it, there is definitely a positive feedback loop that can keep you in shape and excited to maintain. Getting there can be a struggle but once you’re there it’s a huge plus. You get better at structuring your life which can lead to great improvements in all aspects of life.
-Confidence in your body seeps its way into other areas pretty regularly. I find myself a lot more willing to try sports/activities now because I feel I can move my body more consciously. There was always a sort of disconnect from what my mind wanted to do and my confidence my body could perform. My proprioception is a lot better now and even if I feel like I’m gonna suck at something or be uncomfortable, I know that with time I can get better and succeed. On the flip side, I know that I am simply not very good at some things and I’m ok with that. I know my current limits with my body, how I could go about improving different aspects, and can choose if it’s worth it or not. This applies to non-physical activities as well.
- Lower anxiety and general stress levels took a while to achieve, but have a lasting and powerful impact. I use to be incredibly hypochondriac, constantly worrying about health issues that were either very minor or didn’t exist at all. It’s a mental health issue, so it doesn’t just get “cured” all of the sudden, but it does help alleviate those feelings and their frequency. I can say “hey, this concern is valid, but let’s think of it in context.” And remind myself I am fit and healthy in all other ways I’m aware of. I use to sit in that fear and let it overboil before, but now I have a fairly effective escape route from those thoughts. And if it gets real bad, I usually go to the gym to try and work those thoughts out lol.
- Yes girls n gays seem more attracted but I believe a lot of it comes from a more confident demeanor. I’m a lot more willing to be friendly and fun with people when I feel good in my body, and I believe that is the most attractive trait you can gain. Like others have said compliments feel great too and never get stale. It’s a wonderful and fulfilling feeling having someone else’s perspective of you is wholly positive. Super cool. Keeps self-critical thoughts at bay.
- Things feel more grounded?? I’m not quite sure how to explain this one. Maybe this is just the result of obtaining a fully formed frontal lobe, but it happened to coincide with becoming more fit. I feel like when I was younger I would allow the emotions I felt about certain topics, events, responsibilities to act on a physiological level. Challenges in life felt more daunting because I would feel physical responses to my emotions. There is still a direct connection between the two, but I can identify when my emotions are effecting my body, or vice versa. I can compartmentalize better and it helps me make more rational and healthier decisions. Things feel a lot less serious now (in a calm collected way rather than a despondent way).
Overall, some of the best changes in my life. I hope to keep them up for my own sake and would recommend healthy goal setting for anyone interested.
Important Note:
IT SHOULD NEVER BE PRESSURED ONTO ANYONE! DO NOT LET OTHERS TELL YOU WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR BODY!! I think there are a lot of unhealthy motivations for people to try and change their appearance, and as a skinny kid I know them well. Find an activity that suits you and enjoy it! Finding the right people to support and uplift you is really important as well. It can be a team effort!
Massive confidence boost and a sense of purpose. It’s great looking after yourself and putting good food in to your body, it does wonders for you mentally.
The positives others mentioned.
You get more compliments from guys though and it’s not some magical replacement for knowing how to talk to who you’re attracted to. It is a net positive though, and a boost to confidence.
I also needed to start buying new clothes, and struggle sometimes in finding the right length/fit ratio being average height as opposed to tall.
Before gym no girl talked to me. Now I get hit on by men. Yay
This is the reality. Most compliments will come from other dudes.
Nice dick bro.
Nice comment about his dick bro. I like your style.
I like how you style your dick
Whenever I pee at the urinal I make sure to look over the divider and compliment the man next to me while looking into his eyes This is what we really want
My girlfriend won't even do it
Imagine a world where we could compliment eachothers dicks lol & everybody brought eachother up when we felt "down" lolol. ..sigh I've been watching too many alternate universe theory videos at 3am..
There was a local bar with a piss trough in a very small bathroom. Only 2-3 people could stand in the bathroom at once. I made it a point to shout “nice dick” whenever I went in and there were people in there. It was always a hit lmao. I dunno man dudes should compliment dicks more even if we don’t really even know what that dick do
Kinda reminds me of the time somebody at a bar was pissing at a urinal with his pants all the way down to his ankles. The amount of restraint it took me to not slap his ass was huge. But at the same time wouldn't want to touch a random dude's ass at a bar urinal. All I managed was a "nice cheeks bro".
I like your dick style
I style like your dick
I dick like your style
Hi I’m Dick. Yours has style.
Style my dick, bro
Dick, your style? I like.
I'll style my dick like you like
I’ll dick style you how I like
Thanks bro i go heavy with dick curls, PR is .5 lbs may need a spot when I try to hit 1lbs
Nice comment about that guys comment about that other guy's dick man. What do you do, like 5 x 5 of those bad boys?
Typically 5 3 1. Last set should be fully erect hold to failure.
Ouch
I've had at least one person say this to me literally every time I've worn my fanny pack in public. I like short gym shorts but they lack storage space, so, fanny pack... and, apparently, a nice dick.
This guy is the Jordan Belfort of fanny pack salesmen.
I need to see this for myself
I'm always reminded of that scene in dumb & dumber where they both ooo & aaah a couple passing by saying "look at the buns on that" "he must work out" 🤣
Like driving a sports car
I was thinking the same thing, but with motorcycles. Guys love my motorcycle. Yay...
Because a lot of guys lift but just don’t have good physiques. Speaking from experience you’ll get compliments from guys for being big but women will talk to you like you’re an obese cat.
Poor little guy. Did you have a few too many treats? Would you like to go for a walk? Let's go for a walk.
This is so true. All the built guys feel each other's muscles up at the gym. At first, I thought it was weird, but my personal trainer assured me it was normal.
Are the free massages at his home normal?
As long as the tips don’t touch
And socks are on
I see you don't like getting massages from women. Are you a massagenist or something?
I mean it’s not surprising. If a lady started to hit the gym and developed a nice ass and legs, I don’t think I would go up to her and be like “nice ass bro”, that would be a bit creepy lmao. But I’m sure another girl wouldn’t be as apprehensive to give out a similar compliment to that girl
This just makes me wonder what a gym bro would do if another gym bro complimented his ass.
I’ve gotten that complement, tbh I was pretty happy cus I was hitting gluts that day
I see you been working dem gloots, hngh. Sick gains, bro, hngh.
Thanks bro! I see your traps are getting huge
Literally thinking about this the other day. I was scrawny af now I’m pretty muscular. I have had women comment on my physique. But only if I’m intimately involved with them. Now it’s just men telling me. I had a friend just yesterday at a party tell me he was jealous of my body lol
It is way more common for the same sex as you to give you a compliment since neither of you would think of it as anything other than a compliment. A woman saying something to a guy would come off as flirty and the same if we switched the role
Oh 100% I totally get why it’s that way. I also will add I catch women checking me out wayyy more. But it totally makes sense why they aren’t commenting on male bodies without an already established relationship
I think the apt analogy is like boob size. Being a skinny guy is like being flat chested. After you put on LEAN muscle, it’s like reaching a D cup. Girls start to check you out but they will rarely say it publicly.
Women don’t catcall strangers nearly as much (except when they’re drunk)
Same thing happened when I bought an RX7, all of a sudden every dude between the ages of 14 and 74 at the gas station has a story for you
I'm more surprised all those dudes didn't offer you a quart of oil instead.
“Yurp I used to have one of these back in the day make sure you don’t put synthetic oil in it.. huh it’s running a bit rich they do that haha”
Same deal as you, I get em both. The men are far more complimentary though so I enjoy that attention, women LOVE feeling me up and it’s so much more fun and easy to flirt with them and make them laugh. Women are the goal but a nice compliment on my ass or arms by a dude is still a net confidence boost
Trust me the women notice. I get way more side eye looks than inside to.
100% agree. Women notice they just aren’t vocal about it
It will come a lot through compliments on your outfits. Since I got in better shape I've had a decent number of women compliment my shirts, even when they're just regular patterned button-ups. Almost no women will directly compliment a man's body, to the point that the couple times it did happen to me it was honestly a little off-putting.
The thing I notice is that women touch you more, not obviously but stuff like putting their hand on you to steady themselves if they stumble and so on.
Do you find that women stumble around you a lot more often now?
Never have I related to a comment so much. Always been a skinny dude, but years of manual labour has given me a toned physique and just the other day I went to see my dentist only for this 60+ year old man to tell me “wow you’re a fit young man”. Definitely nice to hear but wouldn’t mind hearing it from the opposing sex once in a while!
bros before ho's and dont forget the lube
Real men use spit
It’s funny how that works, I was a huge meat head obsessed with bodybuilding a couple years ago, had a fairly decent physique but now rocking a dad bod and my SO fucking loves it.
Have been depressed and started to hit the gym 5x/week. Now kinda jacked. Still depressed
Yeah being jacked and depressed is better than being just plain depressed. Plus I lift like a maniac even at 45 to combat depression because if I didn't, I'd probably spiral.
How does it help?
Not OP, but for me it helps curb anxiety, helps me be more present, be more confident, and I sleep better. Also it’s a good stress reliever after a tough day.
I can't remember where I saw this, but I always thought it was great phrasing, something like: working out is *not necessarily* an antidepressant, but NOT working out most certainly *is* a depressant.
Physical health has a big role on your mental health
Results are individual but on average from a brain chemical standpoint. It releases different chemicals that your brain may be lacking either due to depression and/or other mental disorders/illnesses. Dopamine when you are doing it. Serotonin (if I remember correctly) when you finish. It also causes cortisol buildup while doing it also, potentially allowing you to relax after your body comes down from the fight or flight response if you exert yourself hard enough (which may also help curb anxiety). Those are just some ways. I hope it gives you some ideas. Though it doesn’t make severe issues go away and professional help is still very much recommended if they don’t go almost all the way away by exercising.
Exercise improves your physical health and gives you more energy, which can help combat the exhaustion and fatigue from depression. It also releases endorphins, which can help with your mood. Exercise also improves your mental health in several ways. Sticking to a program helps keep you on a schedule, forces you to do something positive even when you don't want to, and gives you short-term goals to reach as you work toward a larger long-term goal. Getting more fit can also snowball in a positive way — your body starts looking better, so now you start caring more about hygiene, shaving, haircuts, clothing, etc. And going to the gym can help you make new friends, which can help with loneliness.
Not sure about the person you're asking but for myself it does. Gives you a purpose to get up in the morning and isn't as soul draining as work.
I run obsessively. When I have to take a break for whatever reason it really doesn't take long for me to feel noticeably worse. Doing regular exercise is so great for your mental state.
I kept up lifting while I was depressed most of last year, I figured that I didn't need to be happy to work out and that I could keep getting stronger even if I was depressed. Tried to keep the same attitude about working on creative projects too. It was a net win overall because now I'm doing better I don't have to rebuild those habits from scratch.
> I kept up lifting while I was depressed Instead of keeping up lifting you should have kept uplifting... I'll see myself out.
Relatable honestly
I live for the endorphins I get after a good pump. I noticed my self esteem and mental health takes a dip if I don’t go to the gym for a bit. Also, as much as we all say “gym is my therapy”, it ain’t no real therapy. No shame in going to talk to someone
A weird side effect is that your face gets like 25% more handsome.
ive seen this so much on r/glowup, i think its from losing fat on ur face making facial features more defined
Skinny guys don’t have any fat build up in their face to begin with ig, at least that’s my case.
Broader neck makes most dudes look more handsome
Is that true for all cases? I feel like it depends on your face width (young orlando bloom/pretty boy types)
Bloom is handsome, period. He’d just be handsome and yoked if he got jacked, eg. Henry Cavill circa his role in The Tudors vs. after he bulked up for Superman, The Witcher.
No, but I was skinny and after losing weight and gaining muscle, my jawline and cheeks are definitely more chiseled than before. Fat might not look super obvious on skinny people but it is still there.
Depends, you can be skinny fat where you have skinny arms but a doughy face.
Wth, r/glowup got banned
If you try r/glowups that should work. It was missing the “s”. 😊
What the
Fuck
Happened?
Oh no!
Our table
Its broken!
Funny, I think my face has actually gotten worse. Although I bulked for the past 2 years. Went from 5'8 120 lbs to 160 lbs. I went from no muscle no fat to a decent amount of muscle and some fat. My one good defining feature back when I was skinny was I had a really good jawline. I'm hoping once I start the cut and get lean I'll have that jawline again.
If you lost the jawline, you bulked too hard. 40 pounds in 2 years isn't bad, but if done naturally, you're looking at about 60% of that weight being muscle (at best) and the rest being split between water weight and visceral/subcutaneous fat. The water weight tends to be the worst for the jawline, and the first to leave when you cut. Just make sure your cut isn't just calorie-restriction. Dreamer bulks and starvation cuts are the fastest ways to look worse than you started.
Seriously. I used to be under weight. After several years in the military, I gained muscle mass and would go, "damn I'm hot" when looking in the mirror. In basic training, some guy said I had a rat face and I'm starting to think he was right.
Ngl, I like to make jokes and I can take em pretty well, but that joke would’ve stung a lil bit. It’s way too specific.
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do the compliments change anything? I mean, after 100 one you will prolly go like ''thanks'' but meh, doesnt do anything for me
Definitely, you feel good and start gaining major confidence. And no, the compliments never get old :)
As a man who has pulled teeth for compliments his entire young adult life: no, I don't think I could receive enough compliments from now until the end of my life to reach a level that I consider to be "too much".
Right? I really do get why women can feel uncomfortable with excessive attention from men. But the opposite end of that spectrum is just *soul-crushing*.
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A lot of gym goers suffer from body dysmorphia and still don't think they look great even if they are in fantastic shape. So no, compliments never get old lol.
No one ever gets tired of compliments. Ever
My wife and gay men give me lots of compliments. In other words, *I won*
How many gay men do you have??
Yes
All of them
My wife says it makes her feel insecure about her body. I told her I know how she can change that. Apparently that was a mistake.
People genuinely started treating me better in all kinds of ways. Friends start noticing you and try to “be like you”. You create a more magnetic aura around you that you’ve never felt before. Customer service people will try to help you as well. It is truly life changing. I suggest anyone who is thinking about it to just pull the trigger and start working out. It’s a lot of discipline and dedication but worth all the time you put into it
Going from morbidly obese to fit is wild, it's crazy how differently people treat me now vs then. What you describe is very accurate.
Pretty privilege is a thing for a reason. It is jarring how different society is to you.
Because society views fit/pretty people as people who take care of themselves, and that’s appealing.
People flat out don't respect fat people. Even the most egalitarian person, on a subconscious level has less respect for an obese person.
I agree, I went from 400 lbs 10 years ago to 215 with slight muscle. The different ways people treat you, even people that were being nice but there is just like an extra level they go to now is insane. None of my friends believe me when I say this, but any former fat to skinny person will know exactly what I'm talking about,.
i also noticed this, people who weren’t particularly nice to me in highschool now see me in the gym when i swing by my hometown and they act super nice to me and idk how to feel about it, im glad your nice to me but it took me getting jacked to gain some respect ? lol
Also: maturity. People are dicks when they are teenagers. As they grow, they respect others more.
The discipline is the biggest gain from learning to consistently work out imo. I was always very lazy and undisciplined about pretty much everything: food, homework, sleep, house chores. Learning some discipline helps so much with all that. I think about what I eat and how much every day now, I try to get to sleep on time so my brain can rest and the muscles can build up plenty, I prioritize chores and homework better over just flopping down and playing video games or watching tv. I still give myself the weekend to relax more and have something sweet so I’m not constantly craving stuff, but I don’t let myself go through a whole carton of ice cream and a bag of Oreos in one night anymore.
I started going to the gym for 4 days a week. Its been a few months now...I can't say my discipline in any other aspect of my life has improved the slightest bit. If there was a lesson to be had here, I never got it.
> Guys who have gone from skinny to big and muscular, I went from skinny-fat, to toned/muscular > how has it changed your life? Incredibly, where do I start? 1. Any clothes look good on me. Period 2. I feel great! 3. I eat a lot of great food, 2,600-3,000 cal/day 4. The satisfaction of deadlifting >400 lbs is nice 5. Women dig it. Really. It's very flattering to get the attention.
I'm a lady, but I really noticed the difference in my clothes. I don't need expensive clothes, and I don't need to watch YouTube videos on what to wear. When I'm toned it all just *works*.
Yes about the not needing expensive clothes! Regular clothes from Walmart (no shade to Walmart, but they just not known for their fashion) will look great on a toned and fit body
Getting a sewing machine and learning to alter shirts is a game changer. Anything from a $9.99 shitter dress shirt from Walmart to a $30 Charles Tyrwhitt on sale looks fantastic after I take the sides in. They'd look even better once I figure out how to do darts in the back. I even alter cheap t-shirts to fit better. I haven't needed to alter pants because straight fit pants just look like tight ass skinny jeans on me. Can't even fit my legs through actual skinny jeans.
#1 is huge. All clothes just look better. Even with a baggy shirt, you can tell if someone is fit under it.
WHY ARE WE SHOUTING
Mmmh, when you work out a lot, you can develop a massive chest. He's flexing them muscles by yelling.
LOUD NOISES!
People should really remember that #1 on reddit should really be No. 1.
Or just use the escape character \\ to remove formatting
3. Is fucking underrated and underdiscussed. It's so good. If you're a fat person then your maintenance calories are actually increased because having extra fat passively burns 3 calories per lb, and muscle burns 6~. I lost a lot of fat and gained a good amount of muscle simultaneously and have increased my maintenance calories from my starting point and it rules. It's ofc not just due to the passive factor, but also the active factor. If you can become more active in ways you enjoy and can sustain then you're increasing your active and passive maintenance calories which allows you to eat more in a deficit or at maintenance. If I simply focused on fat loss and no muscle gain I'd be permanently on a pretty massive deficit diet when compared to my active muscled version of myself. I find it so much more sustainable and enjoyable than a pure fat loss focus. My mental health surely would have improved with a pure fat loss approach but it is so much better with lifting and light cardio added.
not me, but my buddy went from not working out basically ever… to getting pretty fucking jacked. He even fixed his posture, which gave him a few extra CMs in height. He's pretty much the same nerdy guy as he always was but now he has sex A LOT. Edit: I’d say he went from 179 CM to 182 CM and probably 70KG to 90 KG.
Jacked nerd that has loads of sex. 100% proficiency Edit..... Your mates basically Henry Cavil.
Bro maxed STR and INT
Got that nerd rage perk
Don’t even know this guy and even I’m proud of him
Ugly duckling syndrome. He developed the personality when not jacked. Now he had the looks and the personality. He is probably swimming in pussy
Confidence got me laid far more than looks ever did. There are tons of socially awkward shredded guys that don't get why their funny, chubby friend is more successful with women.
Better looks = higher confidence
Congrats on the sex to your buddy 🫡
I mean, nerdy and mascular is basically every girl fantasy, I'm not surprised lol
I think thats everyones fantasy really. A hot girl who is also nerdy and sweet? Equally amazing. Most people arent into the classic overly cocky gym bros or gym gal with brand clothes
It is crazy how much more your pull game grows when you’re jacked, always thought it was a trope and boy was I WRONG 😂
Well, with more muscle your should be able to pull more abs bench more and squat more. No gains if you are pulling the same
I was 165lbs graduating high school back in 2015. I was a scrawny little black kid. Joined the Army, snd I got to 225lbs and the best shape of my life after a couple of years. I was more confident, generally people don't fuck with you, and women apparently love muscle. I'm down to 210 now. People always seem to compliment you as well. Overall, fantastic. You feel better about yourself 100%!
In my 30s and weigh 140 wet, reading your comment talking about being scrawny at 165 🫨😅
It’s hilarious that 165 is scrawny to some people. I graduated high school in 2016 at 5’10 and 110 lbs. I sat around 125lbs the past few years and joined a gym this year to try and bulk up. I just hit my goal of 140 a week ago. Going to go for 150 now
I look back it, and I absolutely had very little muscle on myself and whatnot. Im just calling myself scrawny compared to how I am now. I was 5'10 in HS as well. Congrats on hitting your goals tho🤘🤘
What exercises did you find helped the most? Was also a scrawny black kid, about 150 or so. Now I'm 185 and go to the gym 6 days a week for the past 2 years but I feel like I've hit a wall in terms of growth. I'm still getting stronger for sure but I feel like weightwise, I'm stagnant
Sleep and eat more.
People seem to love deadlifts. But I have noticed my body changes the quickest from doing weighted Pull Ups and weighted Ring Dips. Addicted to those two movements currently.
Those 2 are definitely addicting. Deadlifts are great too, but I can't go over a certain weight anymore due to my back. Unfortunately, same with squats. Damn Army ruined my body
Yeah same here. Been doing more slow deads and pauses with less weight. It's just not worth it to do heavy deads.
What kind of routine are you doing? Personally I find generic push / pull routines with a dedicated leg day in the middle most effective. 2x push, 2x pull, 1x legs and the 6th day is whatever I’m actively trying to work on. Sleep is also super important, and cutting back on drinking too 1 night a week at most helped me get over the plateau. Drinking kills your gains. I personally find having an apple watch to track calories incredibly helpful, basically any health orientated smart watch will do the same thing. Having a job where i’m of my feet and moving all day and going to the gym 6 days a week made my maintenance calories significantly higher than I thought, obviously if you’re trying to bulk you should be slightly over that.
Former skinny guy here, turned gym bro. 5’10, currently weighing 175 down from 185. Previously walked around at 130-140 for most of my life. If you’re asking to see if I got more girls? Gonna be honest and say I got an ok amount of girls back when I was skinny, and probably got hit on/ a few more “looks” back then. I think girls may find me a bit more intimidating now? Or I’m just uglier, totally real possibility. Its made me more confident definitely. Not the most confident guy, but more confident. Other than that, the only real difference is my mom telling me I have muscle, and people who I haven’t seen in a few years going “wow you got big”. Just don’t make it your whole personality like I did
how did you maintained the gains? every time I got to workout, I was not able to sustain eating tons of proteins etc.
Honestly bro, it’s one of those you just gotta lock in things. Track everything you eat using MyFitnessPal. For me, it didn’t happen until I finally moved out and was FORCED to cook my own meals. I never cooked a thing in my life when I lived with my parents, so when I got my own home I decided I wasn’t gonna eat McDonald’s everyday but cook my own meals. Did it suck? Yeah man. To this day my meals taste like shit but I got through it. I’m luckily at the point now where I’ve been consistent so long I can be more lenient with my diet and still have an impressive physique.
Might be a weird suggestion, but try out something like hello fresh for like a month. I learned a lot of basic cooking skills from doing that and just kinda paid attention to why they suggest cooking things a certain way. My meals taste much better since I've learned how to cook and I actually get compliments from people now. That chicken and rice can taste good haha. Basically I cooked things too hot and didn't know what ingredients went well with what.
I can now climb stairs without getting out of breath
The greatest wealth is health.
1000% You see people say here on Reddit - and I also have a lot of friends who claim the same - how you turn 30-40 years old and you start getting knee and back pain. I'm in my late 30's and I don't have a single bit of it; I attribute it to working out most of my life since I was in my early 20s. I don't even workout a lot either - just 3 or so days a week and definitely go without working out at all for a week or so every now and then. I definitely have a small belly and wouldn't say I look fit, but my casual lifting and running has me feeling exactly how I felt in my early 20s.
I no longer get sand kicked in my face while my hot girlfriend runs off with the beach bully.
Allison?!? Wait!!
Fry?
At 5'9", went from about 125lb most of my life to about 155lb at my peak. The bulk of the change took place over a year and a half or so. Saw significant changes in my career. Obviously there are some other confounding factors, but I don't believe it was a total coincidence that I went from a reasonably well respected individual contributor to managing managers shortly thereafter. It's evident that people treat me completely differently in our in person interactions and then that confidence compounds. See also - slightly overdressing for a casual workplace.
I always wear a suit for job interviews and so far I've had good success in them. My normal outfits get almost no compliments and I get compliments every day when I'm wearing a suit, to the point where my confidence skyrockets to borderline cocky, which helps in job interviews. Night and day difference compared to 23-year-old scrawny me in an oversized outdated suit from the clearance rack.
I feel good about myself. I like what I see in the mirror. I have a hobby/pursuit I’m passionate about that I can put a lot of effort into. I’m strong, which is nice when I do something athletic or physical. I get men’s respect more easily. I get a lot more attention from women. (Yes, really. I know a lot of people online will say getting jacked won’t help with women. It absolutely will; it’s just not *quite* as straightforward as “muscles = sex.”)
It's not so much that women love strong men, it's just that generally they REALLY don't like weak ones.
I’ll never forget I was on a train removing my luggage from the overhead storage. This woman was checking me out and I was gassed. All of a sudden, the train gives a massive shake and the luggage above my head makes me lose my balance. I never seen someone lose interest so quickly.
Cant answer this question but as someone whos gone from super fat to in healthy shape, it feels AMAZING!!!!
Down 80lbs myself. It feels incredible
People start being weirdly honest with you as if you aren't the same person. My grandparents told me they always thought I was gay before I got in shape. Like, not sure how the two are related but whatever. Only one of us didn't die of old-age yet so who's laughing now grandma!
They’ve never been to the west village
If anything gay guys are more in shape
Weirdly, the better I started looking, the more other males suggested I was homosexual. The ladies have always had fondness for the cheerful cute guy I suppose I always was. But ever since I’m fit like Christian Bale in American Psycho, other random dudes tend to somehow hint I’m not competing with them for the women. Its a pattern. Makes me smirk every time
So mines not exactly what you're asking but I figured it'd be helpful to say anyway. So I've been super skinny, fat and not necessarily muscular but toned and in very good shape. For me when I was super skinny I felt like an alien, I didn't feel bad, I was still healthy but I didn't feel good in myself. When I was fat I had absolutely no self esteem, no confidence, felt shit in myself constantly and didn't want to leave the house. I actually ate even more when I was fat because of comfort eating and not wanting to do anything so made it worse. Not fun, people judge you instantly, taken less seriously and can't do as much physically. When I was in great shape and toned, I had lots of confidence, I felt great in myself, I was way more motivated and active, I was treated alot better and people took me seriously. Also I actually enjoyed clothes shopping for the first time ever because things looked good on me. I received genuine compliments and it was by far the best period ofy life. In short, being fit and having some definition is great, being skinny kinda sucks but at least you're kinda healthy. Being fat I hated and sucks so much. Unfortunately for me, after a long period in and out of hospital and a bunch of mental health stuff, I'm back to being a blob, so I'm in the painfully slow process of losing that weight again, and it's awful. None of my new clothes fit anymore, lost my confidence and basically just can't do anywhere near as much as I use to. But if I stick at things I should be back to my good weight in about 3-4 months. So wish me luck.
I am skinny and I have never set my foot in a gym. The comments here, have really motivated me to join a gym now.
Do it!
I sweat a lot more than I used to and I used to be better at handling the summer heat
Underrated disclaimer. July was consistently my favorite time of year when I was skinny
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Holy moly there is a difference. I’ve been fit my whole life (mostly). Marathons, triathlons. The number of compliments I got over that time: zero. Other than a few “nice shirt” type ones, but nothing about ME specifically. After some injuries I couldn’t do as much cardio, so I shifted to more weights. My shoulders are more broad now, My arms/shoulders/back look much better. I’ve gotten SO MANY compliments in the last 8 months or so. I’m not a young guy either. I’m not exaggerating when I say I’ve gotten more compliments in the last few months than I have in my entire life combined. Obviously people think that I look better. The secondary benefit though… all my clothes look WAY better on me than they did before. It’s like a free wardrobe upgrade because everything fits and hangs and looks better. I vaguely knew that upper body improvements would look good but… oh my god, I wish I had known this years ago. It’s not like I even work out that much more! I just swapped a lot of cardio and some weight for a lot of weight and some cardio.
I went from a stick when I was a teen, to kinda muscular but skinny fat (also poorly fitting clothes, bad posture and awful haircuts), to very lean/muscular with a chiseled V-taper - better style, nicer clothes that fit, a fitting haircut and taller (6’2). It took me around a year of consistent, strict dieting to get to this level. Although I had been working out for around 10 years, I never stuck to dieting which led to me being skinny fat with some muscle. Where do I start? Self esteem and confidence goes through the roof once you have a command and discipline of your diet + exercise routine. I get a lot of attention from women, and when I have conversations I get prolonged eye contact + smiles. I’ve also noticed I get more respect from peers and people give me the benefit of the doubt in workplace/social settings. Also being strong and eating healthy just feels fucking good. I have energy all the time and no issues with sleep. 10/10 would recommend. It has made my life significantly better in every possible way. M
Such a gradual process over so many years it’s impossible to tell. A girl at school when I was like that 11/12 put her hands around my upper arm and exclaimed how skinny it was. Bought a set of dumbbells shortly after. I dunno how tall I was by that point but I reached my current height (6ft 1) by like year 6 (12/13) whilst being very skinny, probably like 60kg if that.
I was very skinny, 135lb at 5' 11", you could see my ribs and all, felt insecure and decided to fix it when I was 19 y/o. Now three years later, I'm still pretty lean at 155lb, but all the weight I have gained is basically muscle and I've also gained confidence since then. You want to be the most fit you can be, it will help immensely with your mental well-being.
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Great to see a ton of positive posts here but I’m gonna state some of the negatives from going to 150 and scrawny to 230 and built. Body always hurts Became more insecure. The thing people don’t tell you is the day you start lifting you will never be big enough in your own eyes. Spend way more money of food and supplements. Can’t enjoy the food I used to as much as I’d like because you’re way more aware of what’s in them. You get tons of compliments. Let me explain why this is a negative a little bit when younger. The compliments really only come from other gym bros and not girls like you would expect. As a 31 year old who is married I definitely appreciate the bro compliment but as a 21 year old I thought it was definitely weird. You can’t find dress clothes that will fit unless you drop$$ on custom tailored clothing. The body of the shirt may fit but your neck are arms will get circulation cut off. Oh you found one that the neck and arms fit, well the rest of the shirt is gonna drown you and go down to your knees. Your free time gets taken up by going to the gym. Again not a bad thing but if I never started lifting I’d definitely be a lot more productive in other aspects. You get f***ed with more when out. For the most part if your built people won’t try to start anything but I’ve seen it more at the bar guys get liquid courage want want to challenge “the big guy at the bar”. I’ve had more issues with that being built that when I was small. Overall though the pros have outweighed cons and I absolutely do not regret putting priority on my fitness and body.
Sounds like this balance might no longer be serving your life. I used to be a lot more invested in lifting and martial arts, and later on down the road I started to experience these exact symptoms. I dialed back and did some work on myself, and found out that I was not loving myself properly and unconditionally. It’s sort of becomes your normal when you are disciplined to think that these things are a trade for being in good shape and healthy. I am starting disagree with that more and more every day. For context I have been a professional personal trainer for 10 years and I’m now going into nursing as a profession. The gym should be an escape not a cage!
If your body always hurts, you're doing something wrong. You also sound like you do not have an entirely healthy relationship with lifting and building muscle, which is more of a personal thing than a consequence of achieving a significant level of hypertrophy.
- I feel confident, which has translated to improvements in almost all aspects of life. I have less anxiety, am better socially, can converse better with strangers, and i feel comfortable being myself when many others may feel embarrassment (note: this should not require being ultra fit, but nevertheless that is where I initially gained the confidence). - People respect you for fitness and use you for motivation. This is my absolute favorite because I love to be a positive role model. After my last competition, I’ve had six friends that wanted to try competing as well so we are all prepping together now for next year. - You get compliments often from men, and on occasion female strangers will also compliment. - you benefit from the halo effect, so others will treat you better and you will be perceived as more like able. This has been very helpful in my school, where lots of our grades are based on subjective evaluations - I can attract women much easier now, at this point I can have multiple women in a rotation which is something I could have never done when I was younger. With that said, a rock hard body can only help you so much in this department, you need to be on your game elsewhere too (social success, job, looks, personality, etc).
Other men treat you differently. There’s more “respect” or at least less disrespectful behavior towards you. They are less likely to try to intimidate you. So going from a skinny kid who was bullied it was a nice change. It’s not so useful as an adult because there is a lot less of it that goes on. I will say that a consequence of that is a bit of confidence but muscle doesn’t make you a better fighter or protect you from a sucker punch so it’s really just a feeling. People look at you more while you workout and sometimes copy you or ask you questions. It’s fine if you like the attention but it’s also uncomfortable if you catch them doing it and you just want to focus on your workout. I’d also say the world is a little less comfortable. Sitting in tight airplane seats sucks a bit more than it used to. This is awkward to say - but larger thighs means more cramped space between the legs which can be uncomfortable if you don’t have enough legroom. You are also more limited in what styles of clothes look good on you. There are a lot of clothes that just look clownish on a larger muscular frame. I know that every dude who is thinking about going to the gym is really reading the answers to this post looking for that guy who tells them how he became 100x more popular with women and gets laid all the time now… but the reality is that being bigger and more muscular is not the key to that. Being somewhat muscular but defined is much more useful in that way. being an absolute unit only attracts women with that particular type and will get you more attention from other guys who idolize the big bodybuilder type. Lean with some lines is where it’s at if you want more side glances from women but there comes a point where being too shredded is overboard to women who don’t want to have to put up with the lifestyle and expectations for themselves that often come with someone who trains at that level.
Confidence boost ❤️
i think my confidence went up but also went down because yes i got jacked and i gained a lot of muscle but i also fell in love with the actual sport of bodybuilding so all i do is look in the mirror and criticize my physique as far as what i need to work on what needs more balance to bring that flow and what not. but i take my shirt off and wear sleeveless shirts to places i wouldn’t usually do so at. i’ve also noticed people who didn’t really talk to me in highschool act like my friend now
Went from 6’1 145 in college to about 200 now (6ish years). Ton of differences but most come from the habit changes and less the actual physical changes. - Satisfaction and drive to improve my physical health and appearance has taken the place of lots of my more unhealthy urges (drugs, partying, excessive gaming/other unhealthy distractions). Id argue it’s easier to trick your brain into rewarding physical activity if you have a vice you’re looking to move away from, but in general just finding an activity that fits your body is very rewarding. Once you find it, there is definitely a positive feedback loop that can keep you in shape and excited to maintain. Getting there can be a struggle but once you’re there it’s a huge plus. You get better at structuring your life which can lead to great improvements in all aspects of life. -Confidence in your body seeps its way into other areas pretty regularly. I find myself a lot more willing to try sports/activities now because I feel I can move my body more consciously. There was always a sort of disconnect from what my mind wanted to do and my confidence my body could perform. My proprioception is a lot better now and even if I feel like I’m gonna suck at something or be uncomfortable, I know that with time I can get better and succeed. On the flip side, I know that I am simply not very good at some things and I’m ok with that. I know my current limits with my body, how I could go about improving different aspects, and can choose if it’s worth it or not. This applies to non-physical activities as well. - Lower anxiety and general stress levels took a while to achieve, but have a lasting and powerful impact. I use to be incredibly hypochondriac, constantly worrying about health issues that were either very minor or didn’t exist at all. It’s a mental health issue, so it doesn’t just get “cured” all of the sudden, but it does help alleviate those feelings and their frequency. I can say “hey, this concern is valid, but let’s think of it in context.” And remind myself I am fit and healthy in all other ways I’m aware of. I use to sit in that fear and let it overboil before, but now I have a fairly effective escape route from those thoughts. And if it gets real bad, I usually go to the gym to try and work those thoughts out lol. - Yes girls n gays seem more attracted but I believe a lot of it comes from a more confident demeanor. I’m a lot more willing to be friendly and fun with people when I feel good in my body, and I believe that is the most attractive trait you can gain. Like others have said compliments feel great too and never get stale. It’s a wonderful and fulfilling feeling having someone else’s perspective of you is wholly positive. Super cool. Keeps self-critical thoughts at bay. - Things feel more grounded?? I’m not quite sure how to explain this one. Maybe this is just the result of obtaining a fully formed frontal lobe, but it happened to coincide with becoming more fit. I feel like when I was younger I would allow the emotions I felt about certain topics, events, responsibilities to act on a physiological level. Challenges in life felt more daunting because I would feel physical responses to my emotions. There is still a direct connection between the two, but I can identify when my emotions are effecting my body, or vice versa. I can compartmentalize better and it helps me make more rational and healthier decisions. Things feel a lot less serious now (in a calm collected way rather than a despondent way). Overall, some of the best changes in my life. I hope to keep them up for my own sake and would recommend healthy goal setting for anyone interested. Important Note: IT SHOULD NEVER BE PRESSURED ONTO ANYONE! DO NOT LET OTHERS TELL YOU WHAT TO DO WITH YOUR BODY!! I think there are a lot of unhealthy motivations for people to try and change their appearance, and as a skinny kid I know them well. Find an activity that suits you and enjoy it! Finding the right people to support and uplift you is really important as well. It can be a team effort!
It made me eat more and learn about time management as well as consistency.
Massive confidence boost and a sense of purpose. It’s great looking after yourself and putting good food in to your body, it does wonders for you mentally.
A lot more compliments from other men
Everyone else thinks I’m not skinny.
The positives others mentioned. You get more compliments from guys though and it’s not some magical replacement for knowing how to talk to who you’re attracted to. It is a net positive though, and a boost to confidence. I also needed to start buying new clothes, and struggle sometimes in finding the right length/fit ratio being average height as opposed to tall.
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These bots all comment with the same exact cadence huh
A woman camwhore/bot posts this and gets top comment
Reddit lmao