Don't give up, OP. This guy thankfully showed you who he was pretty quickly. I have hearing aids, and I'm sure I've lost prospects because of it, but that's their loss, not mine.
Had you not been hard of hearing, who knows how long it would have taken for him to show who he really isā¦ but also, my guess is not long since that is such an insanely gross thing to do. Huge bullet dodged in that regard. Iām sorry you went through that
most people don't read. They see a pretty face and swipe. They find out all the deal-breakers later. It was like that when people had yo meet in real life, too. Often times the deal-breakers showed up after 7-10 years
OP, It hurts that you thought someone was truly interested in you. But may you overcome and move on to more positive things. He didn't give you the time of day, dont invest any emotion in him. Sorry that you went through this rough patch. He showed his true colors quickly and early on. But move on as you should.
š« OP
Please consider that a dodged bullet. What kind of person does that? Ew! Don't feel bad at all, the trash did you favor and took itself out.
He said you seem normal because YOU ARE. He's the abnormal one, and he should seek help.
He didn't think this through. Your feature will save yourself and your next partner so many headaches down the road. His loss and a bullet dodged for you.
I swear that Bumble and other dating apps sometimes hide elements of profiles that are deemed 'unpopular' only to 'unhide' them after a match. I've spotted this twice consciously when I was using them and I asked if the person updated their profile and they said no. It's usually 'unfairly unpopular' preference selections from the multiple choice profile builders. Either it was the app teams A/B testing or phases of profile psych manipulation testing on the back end to understand the effect. Sometimes these apps can be manipulative behind the scenes without people realizing it (e.g. match banking and only revealing them if another match is potentially going to make a paying member to leave the app etc.)
I went on a couple of bumble dates where the other person was shocked that I have kids. Itās in my profile AND my bio, though, so I chalked it up to somebody just not reading it.
It would not surprise me one iota if it turned out Bumbleās done something like that, though, given how willfully bad theyāve been in recent months.
It's guaranteed they have always experimented with feed, match, and profile manipulation to get the results the app wants. There was a time on Tinder where it detected you had exchanged numbers in a chat and a new match would magically buzz in. I have tested the match banking thing and it sometimes happens - to test I swiped right on a friend who had swiped right on me and neither of us got a match notification until much later - when it suited whatever timing the app deemed best for it. Bumble's recently depreciated 'Have you met yet, how did it go?' notification during a chat wasn't just there to get feedback on a date, it was there to put pressure on you to conform to a schedule on their terms so you'd cycle through your matches faster etc. Remember, the house always has to win.
I do think their layout sets it up for that, since for some reason they have the āhomeā icon mislead showing where people are from, but they swipe to the right and you can see where they are living. Itās disappointing but these other experiences convince me itās true.
That is insane, honestly he sounds like a total child and you dodged a bullet. Iām so sorry that happened to you, that is seriously weird and the guy clearly has no idea how to behave as a normal adult! Was he raised by wolves? Jesus christ.
Dont insult the wolves. They dont claim him and more dignified than he ever will be. Wolves wouldnt do that. They would find a way to protect and include their own.
Holy shit. Iām so sorry you had to go through that, OP. This dude has no basic human decency and Iām pretty sure heās not gonna find a potential partner any time soon with that ignorant ass attitude. All I can say is that donāt beat yourself up too much thinking about people like this, theyāre clearly not worth your time. Believe in yourself and I trust that you can find someone much much better.
31 is so young!!! You don't think so now because you can't see it. You have so many many years ahead of finding a fun person. They aren't online. They will fall and slump and dance all in your life. What is great about this is say to yourself dating is not a focus...what if I could wave a magic wand do I want in life and that wish had to have 0 to do with a partnership. If there is no partnership what do you want for you only. And whatever that answer is, every day take on small step toward that goal. Every day. And that process with bring you the greatest gifts and people and fulfillment in life.
Iām 35, you are NOT too old and you absolutely dodged a bullet with an absolute sack of shit! Modern dating is tough. Keep at it and your person is out there. Someone will love you just for how you are and you will realize how stupid these wastes of time were. Just be thankful they showed you who they are quickly because this is about THEM not YOU.
Shocking what low lives people can be when they feel there are no consequences. F that douche. Be glad he showed his true colors rather than wasting a single more minute of your time. How people treat you is a reflection of them not you.
While this might not make you feel better, he did you a favor. He's obviously an asshole, and at least you found out before you got invested into any kind of relationship. Sorry that people suck.
Donāt feel sorry for him. Heās stupid (obviously missing your bio info) and a cowardly asshole (ghosting in the middle of a date and lying to you and the staff). At least you found out early before you had too much time and emotional capital invested in him.
PS- Donāt assume there are people out there for him either. If he does meet and match with someone, it will be trash they both deserve.
Iām sorry you had a bad date that treated you terribly OP!
wtf does it matter that you have hearing aids. He literally had no idea until you told him.
Itās not like he would need to learn sign language and didnāt want to undertake that.
What a stupid, extreme, inappropriate reaction he had.
This is ultimately a win for you imo.
That guy is strange and lacks any social grace whatsoever.
Youāre way too good for that idiot.
It's terrible that happened to you, but my god you dodged a bullet. Someone who is willing to abandon a person without a word would have been a terrible partner.Ā
Shit dude. You did not deserve that. Im so sorry. I sometimes feel humans are the worst creation on this earth. Might as well not have that 6th sense if you wont use it to be kind.
He is the kind of person that gets posted on the are we dating same person group and comments on Reddit that the group is toxic then fights Facebook to get rid of post. Ā Then goes around saying he is the victim and being slandered/libeled. He is the type of person for one of the reasons those groups now exist š¤¢.Ā
How rude, he could just have ended the date later stating letās both think about it and then both of you would have had a nice evening and a nice memory. Itās always allowed to have doubts and no reason to treat people like shit for that. You donāt know what his doubts were btw please remember that.
Wow I canāt believe this story, thatās absolutely disgusting behaviour. Whenever I read stories like these, my first thought/suggestion is that ānot everyone is this badā, but I keep having to say this so often.
Youāre WAY better off to be honest. Donāt let it break your spirits, something will happen for you. Thereās always another fish In the sea, but remember you have to wade through garbage first.
What an absolute prick! 100% his loss. It's sad and depressing that we live in a world where people ghost and do stupid shit like this. Be an adult, and just straight up say what's wrong. I went on a date a few weeks ago, great meal and great conversation, we kiss makeout, 2 days later ghosts me. It's just dumb. Better now than later I say. Keep your head up, the right one will get to you.
I am so sorry you had a date with a POS. Thankfully you dodged a bullet. You are asking for positive feedback, but you dont need any because you did nothing wrong. He was just a POS. Imagine being the person that leaves without telling someone simply because a person is deaf. That is a POS. There are good people out there, but he is not one of them. Dont let it get you down.
Gross. Imagine if your battery hadn't gone out during that first date. You would probably be making plans to go out again with a complete and utter knobhead. Trash took itself out.
I think those batteries died for a reason. Someone up there has got your back and was like, ' not today Satan'.
You had a lucky escape. That individual was rotten through and through.
Itās hard to take it in and view it in this light.
But dance a little jig that he revealed himself so early as illiterate, inattentive, and assholish.
Itās far better to know early vs him pretending just long enough to get laid and disappear.
Oh my god, gurl, I'm so sorry. That is shitty behavior. You shouldn't have had to go through. I cannot even imagine. What an asshole, I hope karma finds himmand bites him in the ass
Damn thatās rough bud, Iāve been stood up before but never ditched mid date.
Itās especially odd heād take such an issue with you being deaf too because clearly your implant works well enough, like youāre able to participate in social environments and communicate with others effectively. Seeing as how it functioned to the point that he didnāt notice you even had it. At least they didnāt stiff you with the tab I guess.
Try and convince yourself that was a low-quality human thing to do. If you were in his shoes, and you realized that the person you were on a date had something that you didn't like (whether it was a personality trait, sense of style, etc), what kind of person would just walk away like that? That's bullshit, nasty, bad behavior.
It's not on you. If this is how he was on a first date, can you imagine how he would act later on? The fact that he didn't even look at your profile before the date to get a better sense on who he was going out with tells you two things: (1) He is lazy, and (2) he is not an intentional, serious dater, as you seem to be.
Thank the Lort he fumbled. You deserve way better treatment. Fuck that guy.
Don't give up. I had this happen once a few years ago. We were getting along really well, met at the bar and had a couple drinks. Conversation seemed great. He got up and went to the bathroom and never came back. Except he left me with his bill and mine. He texted me after I sent him a few. He thought it was funny. No real reason why he didn't stay.
Shake it off and move on. Some people are just tools. Women do it to men too. I've watched a couple-worker go through some crazy things with women on bumble
What an asshole. I will share what my friend told me when I first was divorced, and dating a lot, but not finding satisfaction. It's a numbers game. You have to keep trying until you find the person right for you.
I took that advice seriously, and just was open to dating anyone who may have had a little interest. I understand you may and should modify that, adding some more caution since you are a lady, but please take the spirit of this advice and keep it close to your heart. I dated 15-20 women inside of a year before I have found one that I can see myself with long-term. For a guy it is a very expensive endeavor.
WTAF??? I have read some messed up stories on here but this takes the biscuit. I mean the fact that he didnāt realize that you were deaf until your implant battery died would be if he was so worried about, be a good thing. It would mean that there were no actual impediments to you enjoying one anotherās time.
How old was this guy? If he was really young, like early 20s, I could almost and I mean ALMOST, not understand but realize at that age you do really really really stupidly impulsive things like , ditch a date. If he has even an ounce of a soul in him, heās going to feel like utter shite for hopefully a substantial time, especially since it seemed you guys were having a goof time.
Some people just cannot handle any sort of difficulty. This is what happens when you give out participation trophies. Any sort of adversity, and they run straight for the door without even weighing up the situation.
Iām truly sorry that this happened to you and you deserve better. Try not to give up hope.
My positive feedback: You dodged a bullet.
You clearly stated in your bio that you're deaf and when he actually read it, he became all weird.
That combined with him just leaving you there, makes him an asshole.
I'm sorry he did that to you. This is not your fault and I hate that he makes you wanna give up. I do understand though. One can only take so many situations like this before giving up.
Hug from an internet stranger who wishes you the best. I hope you can find a guy who accepts and loves you for who you are.
I'm confused why he felt you were less attractive after he found out you were deaf. He was obviously attracted enough when your hearing aid was working. Even if something turned him off, at least have the decency to finish the date. Just be glad you found out he was a dick so early on.
Iām sorry this happened to you but you dodged a bullet. Can you image how that guy would be when conflict came up in the relationship? He did you a favor and showed his true colors right away.
What a clown that guy is ā itās not worth dwelling on whatever his internal issues might be. I hope you keep on keepinā on; it canāt get any worse, right? Right?!
What a major a**hole. You deserve so much better and congrats on dodging a bullet. Sending you big hugs!!
Honestly even if that was something he wasnāt expecting, any normal decent adult would still have continued the conversation or bid goodbye politely and thanked YOU for the great 3-hr convo.
Anyways this dude is a walking red flag so good for you for dodging a bullet. Maybe take some times off the app for a while to regain sanity.
Love and power to you.
He did you a great favor! Heās a fuckin non-reading MORON & just that your batteries died, that was someone protecting you & making it possible for you to see his true colors right then & there. Yāall may have had several dates, maybe even hooked up if that hadnāt happened, but no matter the time, he would have probably did the same shit. It was no need for him to leave the date like that. If he was a decent guy, he would have just let the date end & if he didnāt want to hurt your feelings or didnāt know how to go about explaining he was no longer interested/ the situation wasnāt for him. Him could have easily texted you afterwards, thanked you for the date & say it via textā¦.what a shitbag!
Iām so sorry this happened to you. Youāre infinitely better off without him, and he did you a favour by showing his true colours straight off the bat. Like, any semi-decent person would have at least just late the date finish naturally and then message afterwards, and even then itād be pretty vein.
On a lighter note, if I girl told me on a date āI need to charge my batteriesā Iād like her 10x more because idk thatās funny in a good way! Like yes queen we SHALL find you a USB outlet.
I hope you find your person soon :)
This is absolutely awful behavior by anyoneā¦let alone a first date. Dude is a coward! You did nothing wrong. He is probably the guy whoād divorce his wife if she was diagnosed with cancer. You are 100% better off.
Dudes a scumbag, sorry you went through that.
Could do something funny like ātext *insert funny word* if you actually read thisā after you mentioning your implants in your bio. That way they could say the word in conversation to show they actually read it, you could bring the word up to them right before meeting as a joke, or you could just straight up say ācan I check that you know Iām deaf?ā before even meeting up. Saves you going through that again.
Iām so sorry, thatās such a bitch coward move of him š . You sound like a super cool person, and I pity him in that he fumbled the chance in getting to know you.
You deserve better and will find someone much more worth your time!
Donāt be too hard on yourself, the guy was a total d*ckhead. If it was me (especially considering you have similar interests to myself) I wouldnāt have cared and I know a lot of men wouldnāt either. So keep your chin up, hopefully you find your match soon :)
People are weird but blessedly good at ultimately telling you who they really are. So hurtful and so lucky op. Iām sorry this happened and happy he didnāt waste your time
>We both like Star Wars, LOTR, anime and video games.
Sorry your date was an asshole. Just wanted to say there are a near infinite supply of men who like these hobbies, struggle to find girlfriends, and are in fact judged by most women for these hobbies. So I have zero doubt you'll find success in dating if you keep it up and don't let one weirdo throw you off too much.
I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. It's such a chickenshit thing to do, and it's the kind of emotional immaturity that makes dating harder for the rest of us guys that were raised right.
what the eff??? oh my god i am so sorry. seriously wanna know why he got turned off enough to freaking bail, that is so strange to me. you dodged a bullet, but still doesnāt feel good to go through that :( hugs and love, donāt give up, dating sucks <3
In all honesty you seem like a great person to go on a date with and Ontop of that you have a lot of interests guys would love to talk to you about! I wouldnāt let one person mess it up for you, I understand how being stood up feels unfortunately, but I would even take you out haha, good luck out there and donāt give up!
Honestly most guys donāt seem to read bioās I double check if they have and they still miss things grrr itās frustrating but this guy sounds like a douche as said above lucky you found out first date xo
I'm pissed that this happened... He sounds like a tool but hey... you and me lets grab drinks and make sure your implants are dead. That way you have to teach me sign language or we act out what we're trying to communicate or pass notes all night. My positive feedback to you is delete the app it is the most degrading and crappy environment ever to date on.
It's such a BS move to be honest. Apart from dodging a bullet from some major asshole, I can assure you that there are guys with integrity and better character. I can't imagine this being a deal breaker for anyone around me. Btw, it could have been much worse. Someone with having no balls to end while looking in eyes, would definitely have stood you up in future or ghosted you after some time.
Omg thats insane. I'm really sorry you had to experience that OP. I know it doesn't really help at the moment but think about what kind of person he must be to do something like that. Someone like that doesn't seem to be someone you want to be with in the long run. Don't give up hope!
You may be deaf, but he clearly can't read. He showed his true colours by not having the balls to tell you his concerns. You'll find your match somewhere somehow. :)
What a scum bag. Please donāt feel bad about that. I promise not all people are that evil. U dodged a bullet, so please look at it like u didnāt have to waste more time with that awful guy! I wish you all the best!
Well, apparently he was an idiot with terrible reading comprehension as well as no character or class! Oof, I am so sorry. Btw, youāre not old and there are many decent people out there. Better luck next time!
Many people don't read the bio and it happens that some show very openly that they don't like certain things about you. Whether you wrote it in the bio or chat or not. It is very common unfortunately.
At least he showed you his true colors. Not the same thing, but Iāve been on 34 first dates in the last 14 months (38M). So many women seem interested in meeting up, and we have a great vibe messaging and then on the date, only to never hear from them again but they have no problem ordering Round 2 and then not offering to split the bill. But I invest anyway because a couple times itās led to meeting someone special.
So sorry to hear this. I think we're all just being a little to quick to judge these days. It's difficult with the swiping mentality.
I assure you that good guys are out there!
This is not typical behavior and as painful as it was, can you imagine how he must navigated life and how his lack of empathy, compassion and overall kindness would have surfaced later? You dodged a bullet and Iām sorry he was such an asshat. Turn the page and keep swiping. Heās out there āļø
This guy is a jerk. It's impressive you went through 3 hours of talking and he couldn't tell. Great job.
The comment he made about you "almost being normal" should be null and void, his opinion on "normal" doesn't count. Normal people don't leave like he did. Keep your head up.
That guy was a loser and you deserve better. He was weeding himself out, so as much as it SUCKED he did that at the time, he showed you his true colours and that he would not be a good person to date.
Itās his fault, not yours. And he acted dumb after knowing it. If I really match with someone and turn out to like them in the end, those things would not be a problem. Please, lady, donāt give up just yet; your true knight will find you soon!
Majority of dumb guys nowadays don't read profiles and go solely on your looks. Only go out with the guy who reads your profile and you cover the most important bases. I always make sure they've read my profile cause they're always matching just cause I'm attractive. It's annoying. The ones who are insincere who reply Oh no I didn't read it I was mesmerized by your beauty So what's up? vs the guys who are like Oh my bad your looks were distracting I'll go look at it now and they actually go down my interests, they're the ones who get the date over the other guy who doesn't follow up. I'm not here to waste time and I definitely don't like those awkward moments ON a date where they have multiple habits I don't like and I'm no longer interested.
The guy you were on a date with, it's a dk move bailing on the date without explanation but it's a poor move you went out with someone you barely knew. It's kinda unsafe and you should engage in a little more conversation covering important lifestyle things if you're looking for something more serious. Or you'll just keep getting non-serious guys.
Also, your hearing situation is not a big deal at all. That guy is a weirdo. You will find someone who can read and is actually a good guy. Can tell from your post š«¶š» Good Luck! š
Wow! Sorry this happened to you but you made ME feel better! A guy just canceled our first date ābecause heās not feeling the weather today.ā Thanks for reminding me how bad they can suck when they actually show up.
What a dbag! Sorry you had to deal with that. I had a date from Hinge a few years ago and she ghosted me mid date. Said she had something come up from work and unmatched me.
I am so sorry that this happened to you. What a terrible human being. If it helps, I donāt think he is in the majority. I would never ever consider it any kind of dealbreaker or even a con in a relationship to be with a partner that has a cochlear implant. Fuck that guy.
This guy was just a dick with a Captial D.
Granted he may of not legitimately seen it, just due to how alot of men check out of reading profiles due to low match like rate. He should been able to finish the date and just state he wishes the beat and this isn't for him.
Seriously? I would no lie pester you to teach me how to cuss people out in sign language. Maybe mess with you a little by moving my lips to mimic talking. But ghosting mid date is shit. Iāve had women do it to me a few times, Iāve never done it myself. I just finish the date and explain after the fact.
What a fucking asshole!!!! His loss to be honest. You come off as a great person who didnāt deserve this at all. Iām a woman but Iād take you out to drinks on a girlās night , makeup what the douche did to you
Well damn! Sorry about that.
Iād date a deaf girl.. If I was on a date with a deaf girl and her implant batteries died Iād just buy her some more!
Truth be told Iām probably better off with a dead girl.. I donāt really need to be heard all the time. ā¤ļøš¤š
Always helpful when AH identify themselves before you waste too much time on them.
OP I am angry for you- even if he felt it wasnāt a match, for whatever reason, what he did is unacceptable. I sorry you had to deal with that.
This guy thinks it's totally cool to have not read the profile, show up to the date, spend 3 hours in a good conversation, then ditch and only pay for his own drinks while letting you wait indefinitely for him to return.
When he tells his friends this story, I hope they question if they need him in the friend group right now.
If it makes you feel any better, I had a girl cut a date short because she found out that I didn't have a seven-figure income (as in $1 million+).
Sorry that this happend to you honey. One of my best friends had an accident that left him permanently deaf in one ear and he's told me his dating life changed entirely due to it. Now he's got a partner who's the kindest person ever tho! Dont lose hope OP!Ā
This is absolutely horrifying! I am so, so, so sorry this happened to you. You absolutely deserved respect, and for him to even think about trying to justify his actions. Fucking coward. You guys were already having a convo so what changed. Thatās dumb as hell. I hope he rots. For real.
Thatās so stupid, itās the same as walking out on a date because theyāre wearing glasses. Or because you put on a bandaid after getting a cut.
That guy is on a very low level of emotional development and empathy. You were lucky to find out so soon!
Lots of people get sick or disabled later in life and, a guy like that would leave you when youāre going through a difficult situation. He doesnāt care about anyoneās personality, interests, he only has the capacity to care for himself. Although we also canāt know that, he probably lacks self-awareness as well.
I know it hurts but you really dodged a bullet. Not all people got a chance to see who their partner is early on, some only found out years into the relationship.
I am so sorry you went through that. It stings every time I get stood up or get unmatched but I never give up. I can say that I have been in situations where I've been on dates where we don't speak the same language and my phone that I've been useing Google translate the entire time runs out of battery.
The first time this happened I did get anxious afraid that I wouldn't be able to keep them entertained. It just took me a moment to realize that I just needed to slow down and have infinite patience, that they liked me I just needed to listen to not just words but body language dancing together or sometimes just hold hands and listen to live music together there's so much to learn from someone just being in person and getting to know how there energy feels.
This going forward has helped me on every date haveing confidence that I could have good dates even if we can't talk or if they don't have perfect English.
You dodged a bullet - this dude ditched you during the date š I dont care what country you're from, this is douche-baggery in its worst form
tell me what he looks like and I'll punch him in throat
Wtf? He was having a good time and all you had to do was change your implant batteries and things would have been fine? He absolutely shot himself in the foot for no reason.
What happened by that guy was just really disgusting and vile. Matching and unmatching indeed can be a problem, but this is one notch too far. I have what is called a āhidden disabilityā myself and I find it a really hard thing for me to deal with at times! You are an individual who deserves better and you will get what you want in life no matter what! I have faith in you!
I am a big women. I make sure there are good photos for them to know. Down playing my boobs which are also on par, because sometimes thatās all they see. Maybe do a really nice shot of you with your head tilted and it showing. Losing the assholes to just swiping left is no great loss. You are awesome, but yes most men donāt read while swiping. And while some will read while in texting, itās best to put it in photos.
Hey you dodged a bullet. Sounds like a hes got poor qualities if he cant understand helth issues. Like what happens when you get older and he gets cancer, would you dump him then.
There is no reason for him to care about the implants. You interacted very well on the first half of the date, and you were both having fun.
Then to make matters worse, he ghosted you ON A DATE, over such a trivial thing. That says all you need to know about him. Very immature and insecure. Actually, he did you a favor. It could have taken weeks to discover this side of him.
With regard to your profile, it is very possible he read it, but maybe wasn't familiar with what cochlear implants are. People have a tendency to skip over stuff they are unfamiliar with.
Please don't give up because of this shitty person's odd interaction. You deserve to find someone, everyone does. Dating is hard though. If I can put one piece of advice that would help, it would be to not put pressure on yourself and just roll with what comes. It's amazing how much easier it gets when you have no expectationsĀ
This exact situation happened to me, from the guy's perspective. She did NOT disclose that she wore hearing aids beforehand. TBH it was an initial shock but she was normal, fun and cute so I quickly forgot about it and we ended up sucking face in the parking lot. Don't let one shitty guy's bad reaction ruin it for you OP
What a coward. How old was he? 5? Such an immature dushbag. Even if he had some issues with you for what ever reason, he could have just ended the date in a normal way. Walked you to your taxi and said fare well. Leaving you sitting there was very rude and shows his immaturity. If he treats all people like that he will never find a serious relationship anyway.
That's wild, even if I didn't realize it I would have so many questions just out of sheer curiosity. I can understand if someone was deaf completely that it would be a deal breaker if learning ASL was required just for basic communication, but since you have an implant to let you hear still and the ASL could come later over time for some situations I don't get the issue. I've never heard of a deafphobic person and I think he's definitely the weird one here.
Thatās beyond fucked. Even if he wasnāt interested he couldāve bought you another drink and wrapped the night up and explained he didnāt feel a connection. Iām sorry OP.
Wow. Just think if you instead said "I have to go the bathroom" and changed the batteries there...he doesn't notice a thing...then a few dates later he finds out why and bails...yikes...you definitely dodged a bullet by being upfront, especially considering you mentioned it on the profile. I don't use that app, but have female friends that got all upset when a guy bailed when suddenly finding out well after that they had kids š kudos to being upfront
Fuck that guy. And I hope heās on Reddit and reads this and realizes what a gross person he is. š¤¢
Hang in there, and better luck on your next Bumble. Youāll definitely win the āworst dateā question on some future date!
I am so sorry that this happened to you. This guy had no sense of basic human decency. So the universe removed his unworthy ass out of your life. So be happy that you are loved by the universe.
Also he removed his unworthy self from your life in such a bad manner that if you ever want to give others an example of total ātrashā in face of human, tell them this story.
But please do both let actions of a trash, direct your life path.
When you meet worthy inspirational people, then it is time for you to take the next step not based on an insignificant trash.
What city this happened at? If I may ask
Omfg what a douchebag! In my experience as a girl in dating apps, 90% of dudes donāt bother to read bios. Many just swipe right on everyone and hope for someone to match back. Increases their odds, maybe?
Either way, you dodged a bullet. Obviously heās a complete idiot. I am so sorry you had to go through that, no one deserves that. Donāt give up!
It shows one does not simply walk into a bar and find their true match.
Honnestly I'm deeply sorry to read this OP but please stay strong reading your story you're honest and upfront about your condition so there's nothing to feel bad about from your side, sadly some people are like this nowadays :(
Speaking from personal experiences it can be hard to talk about medical conditions as it tends to scare people away but don't give up keep on looking and I am sure the true one will show up. <3
There's some good in this world OP and it is worth fighting for!!
This is legitimately horrendous and beyond cowardly.
Sadly people like this exist in the world. But hopefully a small minority. Sorry you had to go through that.
Dodged a bullet but still an awful way to dodge the bullet / so many more ways his stunted self could have handled it.
Donāt give up hope and in a few months itāll just make for a funny story with your new partner!
That dude is a child, you dodged a bullet. Thats awful to go through, you did nothing wrong. There are a lot of assholes out there nowadays, lots of dating horror stories
Such an unhinged thing to do holy shit thats disgusting. Sorry you went throught that :(
Thank you š
Don't give up, OP. This guy thankfully showed you who he was pretty quickly. I have hearing aids, and I'm sure I've lost prospects because of it, but that's their loss, not mine.
Thank you. Its just frustrating because its not like I hid it. I was open about it on my profile. Honestly its his loss but its not a great feelingĀ
Never a great feeling. But he clearly has major reading comprehension problems, and you don't want to be saddled with an idiot like that anyway.
This lol. Imagine being stuck with a person who willingly refuses to read when they have the ability.Ā
Right? They are or behave like "blind" and are bothered by the fact you can't hear.
Had you not been hard of hearing, who knows how long it would have taken for him to show who he really isā¦ but also, my guess is not long since that is such an insanely gross thing to do. Huge bullet dodged in that regard. Iām sorry you went through that
most people don't read. They see a pretty face and swipe. They find out all the deal-breakers later. It was like that when people had yo meet in real life, too. Often times the deal-breakers showed up after 7-10 years
It's okay to just randomly swipe, but you have to read the profile before you agree to the date or at least read it right before the date!!
OP, It hurts that you thought someone was truly interested in you. But may you overcome and move on to more positive things. He didn't give you the time of day, dont invest any emotion in him. Sorry that you went through this rough patch. He showed his true colors quickly and early on. But move on as you should.
š« OP Please consider that a dodged bullet. What kind of person does that? Ew! Don't feel bad at all, the trash did you favor and took itself out. He said you seem normal because YOU ARE. He's the abnormal one, and he should seek help.
He didn't think this through. Your feature will save yourself and your next partner so many headaches down the road. His loss and a bullet dodged for you.
I swear that Bumble and other dating apps sometimes hide elements of profiles that are deemed 'unpopular' only to 'unhide' them after a match. I've spotted this twice consciously when I was using them and I asked if the person updated their profile and they said no. It's usually 'unfairly unpopular' preference selections from the multiple choice profile builders. Either it was the app teams A/B testing or phases of profile psych manipulation testing on the back end to understand the effect. Sometimes these apps can be manipulative behind the scenes without people realizing it (e.g. match banking and only revealing them if another match is potentially going to make a paying member to leave the app etc.)
Itās so wild you say that, because I feel like I was 99% sure about a āhave kidsā, and after matched and spoke, it was there.
I went on a couple of bumble dates where the other person was shocked that I have kids. Itās in my profile AND my bio, though, so I chalked it up to somebody just not reading it. It would not surprise me one iota if it turned out Bumbleās done something like that, though, given how willfully bad theyāve been in recent months.
It's guaranteed they have always experimented with feed, match, and profile manipulation to get the results the app wants. There was a time on Tinder where it detected you had exchanged numbers in a chat and a new match would magically buzz in. I have tested the match banking thing and it sometimes happens - to test I swiped right on a friend who had swiped right on me and neither of us got a match notification until much later - when it suited whatever timing the app deemed best for it. Bumble's recently depreciated 'Have you met yet, how did it go?' notification during a chat wasn't just there to get feedback on a date, it was there to put pressure on you to conform to a schedule on their terms so you'd cycle through your matches faster etc. Remember, the house always has to win.
I do think their layout sets it up for that, since for some reason they have the āhomeā icon mislead showing where people are from, but they swipe to the right and you can see where they are living. Itās disappointing but these other experiences convince me itās true.
Seriously?? Anyway, I read a profile one more time before I go to the date...
unhinged? unbumbly, even
r/angryupvote
Ok cupid š
>Such an ~~unhinged~~ unbumbled thing to do holy shit thats disgusting. Better.
That is insane, honestly he sounds like a total child and you dodged a bullet. Iām so sorry that happened to you, that is seriously weird and the guy clearly has no idea how to behave as a normal adult! Was he raised by wolves? Jesus christ.
I know I was extremely shocked when the waitress told me. I laughed that he only paid for his drinks. Its just wild
What a POS!? If you ever run into him again, punch him in noggin for me! You deserve better
Yeah smack him one for me too. Some people need a slapping.
Bro really only paid for his drinks. You dodged a total loser. You win here OP, even if you feel you lost, you totally didnt.
Dont insult the wolves. They dont claim him and more dignified than he ever will be. Wolves wouldnt do that. They would find a way to protect and include their own.
Partner was raised by wolves and would never do something like that
Holy shit. Iām so sorry you had to go through that, OP. This dude has no basic human decency and Iām pretty sure heās not gonna find a potential partner any time soon with that ignorant ass attitude. All I can say is that donāt beat yourself up too much thinking about people like this, theyāre clearly not worth your time. Believe in yourself and I trust that you can find someone much much better.
Thank you š i feel like i lost hope in modern dating lol. Im 31F and im not getting any younger either
31 is so young!!! You don't think so now because you can't see it. You have so many many years ahead of finding a fun person. They aren't online. They will fall and slump and dance all in your life. What is great about this is say to yourself dating is not a focus...what if I could wave a magic wand do I want in life and that wish had to have 0 to do with a partnership. If there is no partnership what do you want for you only. And whatever that answer is, every day take on small step toward that goal. Every day. And that process with bring you the greatest gifts and people and fulfillment in life.
Iām 35, you are NOT too old and you absolutely dodged a bullet with an absolute sack of shit! Modern dating is tough. Keep at it and your person is out there. Someone will love you just for how you are and you will realize how stupid these wastes of time were. Just be thankful they showed you who they are quickly because this is about THEM not YOU.
Omg what a major asshole! So sorry this happened OP!
š
Shocking what low lives people can be when they feel there are no consequences. F that douche. Be glad he showed his true colors rather than wasting a single more minute of your time. How people treat you is a reflection of them not you.
While this might not make you feel better, he did you a favor. He's obviously an asshole, and at least you found out before you got invested into any kind of relationship. Sorry that people suck.
Im happy that he showed his true colours but im shocked that there are people out there for him and genuinely feel sorry for him
Donāt feel sorry for him. Heās stupid (obviously missing your bio info) and a cowardly asshole (ghosting in the middle of a date and lying to you and the staff). At least you found out early before you had too much time and emotional capital invested in him. PS- Donāt assume there are people out there for him either. If he does meet and match with someone, it will be trash they both deserve. Iām sorry you had a bad date that treated you terribly OP!
wtf does it matter that you have hearing aids. He literally had no idea until you told him. Itās not like he would need to learn sign language and didnāt want to undertake that. What a stupid, extreme, inappropriate reaction he had. This is ultimately a win for you imo. That guy is strange and lacks any social grace whatsoever. Youāre way too good for that idiot.
Right, like... if the batteries didn't die, they might have had a second date.
Very sorry for you OP. Looks like trash took itself outĀ
DO NOT GIVE UP! This is despicable behaviour and is in NO WAY a reflection on you but instead a reflection on him. You will find your person.
Thank you š„ŗ
Sometimes the trash takes itself out.
It's terrible that happened to you, but my god you dodged a bullet. Someone who is willing to abandon a person without a word would have been a terrible partner.Ā
Shit dude. You did not deserve that. Im so sorry. I sometimes feel humans are the worst creation on this earth. Might as well not have that 6th sense if you wont use it to be kind.
He is the kind of person that gets posted on the are we dating same person group and comments on Reddit that the group is toxic then fights Facebook to get rid of post. Ā Then goes around saying he is the victim and being slandered/libeled. He is the type of person for one of the reasons those groups now exist š¤¢.Ā
How rude, he could just have ended the date later stating letās both think about it and then both of you would have had a nice evening and a nice memory. Itās always allowed to have doubts and no reason to treat people like shit for that. You donāt know what his doubts were btw please remember that.
Wow I canāt believe this story, thatās absolutely disgusting behaviour. Whenever I read stories like these, my first thought/suggestion is that ānot everyone is this badā, but I keep having to say this so often.
Man....fuck that guy honestly.
Thatās so messed up.
Youāre WAY better off to be honest. Donāt let it break your spirits, something will happen for you. Thereās always another fish In the sea, but remember you have to wade through garbage first.
What an absolute prick! 100% his loss. It's sad and depressing that we live in a world where people ghost and do stupid shit like this. Be an adult, and just straight up say what's wrong. I went on a date a few weeks ago, great meal and great conversation, we kiss makeout, 2 days later ghosts me. It's just dumb. Better now than later I say. Keep your head up, the right one will get to you.
 Letās celebrate you dodging a bullet!
Iām struggling to find words that wonāt get me banned from Reddit
Youāre not alone
Yeah, me too.
I am so sorry you had a date with a POS. Thankfully you dodged a bullet. You are asking for positive feedback, but you dont need any because you did nothing wrong. He was just a POS. Imagine being the person that leaves without telling someone simply because a person is deaf. That is a POS. There are good people out there, but he is not one of them. Dont let it get you down.
Can't believe that he didn't read your bio before agreeing to a date with you. People are so lazy.
Gross. Imagine if your battery hadn't gone out during that first date. You would probably be making plans to go out again with a complete and utter knobhead. Trash took itself out.
I think those batteries died for a reason. Someone up there has got your back and was like, ' not today Satan'. You had a lucky escape. That individual was rotten through and through.
I'm a slightly shit person and even I wouldnt do that
That's really strange. You are deaf but still can hear and talk just fine with an implant. Who cares? That's such a weird thing to be shallow about.
Wow what a total asshole. I guess lucky you found out sooner rather than later!
Itās hard to take it in and view it in this light. But dance a little jig that he revealed himself so early as illiterate, inattentive, and assholish. Itās far better to know early vs him pretending just long enough to get laid and disappear.
Oh my god, gurl, I'm so sorry. That is shitty behavior. You shouldn't have had to go through. I cannot even imagine. What an asshole, I hope karma finds himmand bites him in the ass
I think weāve all done some immature things dating but this is next level. You dodged a bullet.
Damn thatās rough bud, Iāve been stood up before but never ditched mid date. Itās especially odd heād take such an issue with you being deaf too because clearly your implant works well enough, like youāre able to participate in social environments and communicate with others effectively. Seeing as how it functioned to the point that he didnāt notice you even had it. At least they didnāt stiff you with the tab I guess.
Try and convince yourself that was a low-quality human thing to do. If you were in his shoes, and you realized that the person you were on a date had something that you didn't like (whether it was a personality trait, sense of style, etc), what kind of person would just walk away like that? That's bullshit, nasty, bad behavior. It's not on you. If this is how he was on a first date, can you imagine how he would act later on? The fact that he didn't even look at your profile before the date to get a better sense on who he was going out with tells you two things: (1) He is lazy, and (2) he is not an intentional, serious dater, as you seem to be. Thank the Lort he fumbled. You deserve way better treatment. Fuck that guy.
I am so sorry fucck that guy forever!!!!!
Don't give up. I had this happen once a few years ago. We were getting along really well, met at the bar and had a couple drinks. Conversation seemed great. He got up and went to the bathroom and never came back. Except he left me with his bill and mine. He texted me after I sent him a few. He thought it was funny. No real reason why he didn't stay. Shake it off and move on. Some people are just tools. Women do it to men too. I've watched a couple-worker go through some crazy things with women on bumble
What an asshole. I will share what my friend told me when I first was divorced, and dating a lot, but not finding satisfaction. It's a numbers game. You have to keep trying until you find the person right for you. I took that advice seriously, and just was open to dating anyone who may have had a little interest. I understand you may and should modify that, adding some more caution since you are a lady, but please take the spirit of this advice and keep it close to your heart. I dated 15-20 women inside of a year before I have found one that I can see myself with long-term. For a guy it is a very expensive endeavor.
He deafinately wasn't the one
WTAF??? I have read some messed up stories on here but this takes the biscuit. I mean the fact that he didnāt realize that you were deaf until your implant battery died would be if he was so worried about, be a good thing. It would mean that there were no actual impediments to you enjoying one anotherās time. How old was this guy? If he was really young, like early 20s, I could almost and I mean ALMOST, not understand but realize at that age you do really really really stupidly impulsive things like , ditch a date. If he has even an ounce of a soul in him, heās going to feel like utter shite for hopefully a substantial time, especially since it seemed you guys were having a goof time. Some people just cannot handle any sort of difficulty. This is what happens when you give out participation trophies. Any sort of adversity, and they run straight for the door without even weighing up the situation. Iām truly sorry that this happened to you and you deserve better. Try not to give up hope.
My positive feedback: You dodged a bullet. You clearly stated in your bio that you're deaf and when he actually read it, he became all weird. That combined with him just leaving you there, makes him an asshole. I'm sorry he did that to you. This is not your fault and I hate that he makes you wanna give up. I do understand though. One can only take so many situations like this before giving up. Hug from an internet stranger who wishes you the best. I hope you can find a guy who accepts and loves you for who you are.
I'm confused why he felt you were less attractive after he found out you were deaf. He was obviously attracted enough when your hearing aid was working. Even if something turned him off, at least have the decency to finish the date. Just be glad you found out he was a dick so early on.
I'm sorry this happened to you.
Iām sorry this happened to you but you dodged a bullet. Can you image how that guy would be when conflict came up in the relationship? He did you a favor and showed his true colors right away.
What a clown that guy is ā itās not worth dwelling on whatever his internal issues might be. I hope you keep on keepinā on; it canāt get any worse, right? Right?!
Thatās awful. Pure awful behavior. Iām so sorry you experienced that!
Disgustingā¦sorry this happened to you OP ): dating is a total shit show atm
He's shown his true colours and level of respect early on, you dodged a bullet, forget him and carry on š
What a major a**hole. You deserve so much better and congrats on dodging a bullet. Sending you big hugs!! Honestly even if that was something he wasnāt expecting, any normal decent adult would still have continued the conversation or bid goodbye politely and thanked YOU for the great 3-hr convo. Anyways this dude is a walking red flag so good for you for dodging a bullet. Maybe take some times off the app for a while to regain sanity. Love and power to you.
He did you a great favor! Heās a fuckin non-reading MORON & just that your batteries died, that was someone protecting you & making it possible for you to see his true colors right then & there. Yāall may have had several dates, maybe even hooked up if that hadnāt happened, but no matter the time, he would have probably did the same shit. It was no need for him to leave the date like that. If he was a decent guy, he would have just let the date end & if he didnāt want to hurt your feelings or didnāt know how to go about explaining he was no longer interested/ the situation wasnāt for him. Him could have easily texted you afterwards, thanked you for the date & say it via textā¦.what a shitbag!
You dodged a huge bullet. Better to find out sooner rather than later. Someone will appreciate you for everything that you are.
I'm sorry that happened to you. He obviously was clueless, and you deserve so much more! Hugs
Im sorry this happened to you. On a good note trash took itself out.
Iām so sorry this happened to you. Youāre infinitely better off without him, and he did you a favour by showing his true colours straight off the bat. Like, any semi-decent person would have at least just late the date finish naturally and then message afterwards, and even then itād be pretty vein. On a lighter note, if I girl told me on a date āI need to charge my batteriesā Iād like her 10x more because idk thatās funny in a good way! Like yes queen we SHALL find you a USB outlet. I hope you find your person soon :)
What a douche...dude will get what he deserves!
Wow, what a piece of shit
You are so much better off without someone so ignorant
Don't give up! You sound like a catch
This is absolutely awful behavior by anyoneā¦let alone a first date. Dude is a coward! You did nothing wrong. He is probably the guy whoād divorce his wife if she was diagnosed with cancer. You are 100% better off.
Dudes a scumbag, sorry you went through that. Could do something funny like ātext *insert funny word* if you actually read thisā after you mentioning your implants in your bio. That way they could say the word in conversation to show they actually read it, you could bring the word up to them right before meeting as a joke, or you could just straight up say ācan I check that you know Iām deaf?ā before even meeting up. Saves you going through that again.
Iām so sorry, thatās such a bitch coward move of him š . You sound like a super cool person, and I pity him in that he fumbled the chance in getting to know you. You deserve better and will find someone much more worth your time!
Donāt be too hard on yourself, the guy was a total d*ckhead. If it was me (especially considering you have similar interests to myself) I wouldnāt have cared and I know a lot of men wouldnāt either. So keep your chin up, hopefully you find your match soon :)
Wow! You dodged a bullet. That is the worst behavior Iāve heard in a long time. Iām sorry you experienced that.
People are weird but blessedly good at ultimately telling you who they really are. So hurtful and so lucky op. Iām sorry this happened and happy he didnāt waste your time
Please donāt give up! This guy is a total douche bag and showed his whole ASS upfront. You dodged a major bullet.
>We both like Star Wars, LOTR, anime and video games. Sorry your date was an asshole. Just wanted to say there are a near infinite supply of men who like these hobbies, struggle to find girlfriends, and are in fact judged by most women for these hobbies. So I have zero doubt you'll find success in dating if you keep it up and don't let one weirdo throw you off too much.
Piece of š© you will meet someone who will treat you right
For an implant??? Jesus Christ this dude is smoking
Believe me , this man will die alone. And I hope one day you will witness that
I'm so sorry you have to deal with that. It's such a chickenshit thing to do, and it's the kind of emotional immaturity that makes dating harder for the rest of us guys that were raised right.
I wish there was an alarm that would go off when you encounter shitty people. What he did was so uncalled for.
He's just immature and childish in his reaction. FYI you are normal...keep putting yourself out there.
what the eff??? oh my god i am so sorry. seriously wanna know why he got turned off enough to freaking bail, that is so strange to me. you dodged a bullet, but still doesnāt feel good to go through that :( hugs and love, donāt give up, dating sucks <3
Holy f**kā¦. My jaw hit the floor reading that
Thereās better men out there donāt sweat it
Please know that this is not a reflection of you. You were honest and he was cruel.
Some guys look at the pics and don't bother with bio. But still no excuse for being a dickless ass. Sorry
In all honesty you seem like a great person to go on a date with and Ontop of that you have a lot of interests guys would love to talk to you about! I wouldnāt let one person mess it up for you, I understand how being stood up feels unfortunately, but I would even take you out haha, good luck out there and donāt give up!
Thatās so weird. I mean even if he didnāt know you were deaf at first I canāt understand why that would be an issue if everything else was fineĀ
Honestly most guys donāt seem to read bioās I double check if they have and they still miss things grrr itās frustrating but this guy sounds like a douche as said above lucky you found out first date xo
I'm pissed that this happened... He sounds like a tool but hey... you and me lets grab drinks and make sure your implants are dead. That way you have to teach me sign language or we act out what we're trying to communicate or pass notes all night. My positive feedback to you is delete the app it is the most degrading and crappy environment ever to date on.
It's such a BS move to be honest. Apart from dodging a bullet from some major asshole, I can assure you that there are guys with integrity and better character. I can't imagine this being a deal breaker for anyone around me. Btw, it could have been much worse. Someone with having no balls to end while looking in eyes, would definitely have stood you up in future or ghosted you after some time.
He was an idiot, bullet dodged.
Omg thats insane. I'm really sorry you had to experience that OP. I know it doesn't really help at the moment but think about what kind of person he must be to do something like that. Someone like that doesn't seem to be someone you want to be with in the long run. Don't give up hope!
You may be deaf, but he clearly can't read. He showed his true colours by not having the balls to tell you his concerns. You'll find your match somewhere somehow. :)
What a scum bag. Please donāt feel bad about that. I promise not all people are that evil. U dodged a bullet, so please look at it like u didnāt have to waste more time with that awful guy! I wish you all the best!
Such a douchebag
Absolutely shitty. But hey, you dodged a major bullet since a true piece of trash is out of your life.
Please donāt let his actions get to you. Heās the one with the issue. You did nothing wrong.
You dodged a bullet imo
Well, apparently he was an idiot with terrible reading comprehension as well as no character or class! Oof, I am so sorry. Btw, youāre not old and there are many decent people out there. Better luck next time!
People ghost for all type of reasons do t over think it
Many people don't read the bio and it happens that some show very openly that they don't like certain things about you. Whether you wrote it in the bio or chat or not. It is very common unfortunately.
At least he showed you his true colors. Not the same thing, but Iāve been on 34 first dates in the last 14 months (38M). So many women seem interested in meeting up, and we have a great vibe messaging and then on the date, only to never hear from them again but they have no problem ordering Round 2 and then not offering to split the bill. But I invest anyway because a couple times itās led to meeting someone special.
So sorry to hear this. I think we're all just being a little to quick to judge these days. It's difficult with the swiping mentality. I assure you that good guys are out there!
This is not typical behavior and as painful as it was, can you imagine how he must navigated life and how his lack of empathy, compassion and overall kindness would have surfaced later? You dodged a bullet and Iām sorry he was such an asshat. Turn the page and keep swiping. Heās out there āļø
You don't need a child like that in your life.
Girl Iām crying š¢, but Iām happy that this guy is out of your life, someone that does something like canāt be a good person!
You wouldnāt want to share a life with a man with such a low moral compass anyhow . The universe did you a favour by showing you who he really was .
This guy is a jerk. It's impressive you went through 3 hours of talking and he couldn't tell. Great job. The comment he made about you "almost being normal" should be null and void, his opinion on "normal" doesn't count. Normal people don't leave like he did. Keep your head up.
That guy was a loser and you deserve better. He was weeding himself out, so as much as it SUCKED he did that at the time, he showed you his true colours and that he would not be a good person to date.
Itās his fault, not yours. And he acted dumb after knowing it. If I really match with someone and turn out to like them in the end, those things would not be a problem. Please, lady, donāt give up just yet; your true knight will find you soon!
Majority of dumb guys nowadays don't read profiles and go solely on your looks. Only go out with the guy who reads your profile and you cover the most important bases. I always make sure they've read my profile cause they're always matching just cause I'm attractive. It's annoying. The ones who are insincere who reply Oh no I didn't read it I was mesmerized by your beauty So what's up? vs the guys who are like Oh my bad your looks were distracting I'll go look at it now and they actually go down my interests, they're the ones who get the date over the other guy who doesn't follow up. I'm not here to waste time and I definitely don't like those awkward moments ON a date where they have multiple habits I don't like and I'm no longer interested. The guy you were on a date with, it's a dk move bailing on the date without explanation but it's a poor move you went out with someone you barely knew. It's kinda unsafe and you should engage in a little more conversation covering important lifestyle things if you're looking for something more serious. Or you'll just keep getting non-serious guys. Also, your hearing situation is not a big deal at all. That guy is a weirdo. You will find someone who can read and is actually a good guy. Can tell from your post š«¶š» Good Luck! š
Don't let a jerk ruin your future happiness. One less frog you have to kiss before you find your prince now!
Absolutely vile behaviour from him, please don't let this guy get to you and knock your confidence.
Wow! Sorry this happened to you but you made ME feel better! A guy just canceled our first date ābecause heās not feeling the weather today.ā Thanks for reminding me how bad they can suck when they actually show up.
What a dbag! Sorry you had to deal with that. I had a date from Hinge a few years ago and she ghosted me mid date. Said she had something come up from work and unmatched me.
I am so sorry that this happened to you. What a terrible human being. If it helps, I donāt think he is in the majority. I would never ever consider it any kind of dealbreaker or even a con in a relationship to be with a partner that has a cochlear implant. Fuck that guy.
Thatās so messed up!! Just goes to show people donāt actually read and itās insane. Iām so sorry you dealt with that!
This guy was just a dick with a Captial D. Granted he may of not legitimately seen it, just due to how alot of men check out of reading profiles due to low match like rate. He should been able to finish the date and just state he wishes the beat and this isn't for him.
Seriously? I would no lie pester you to teach me how to cuss people out in sign language. Maybe mess with you a little by moving my lips to mimic talking. But ghosting mid date is shit. Iāve had women do it to me a few times, Iāve never done it myself. I just finish the date and explain after the fact.
What a pos, Iām sorry!
So many people donāt read bios- itās kind of insane. Iām so sorry you had to go through that. Heās trash.
Why can't I ever find someone like you to match with? It's hard to find anyone who enjoys those things in my area.
What a fucking asshole!!!! His loss to be honest. You come off as a great person who didnāt deserve this at all. Iām a woman but Iād take you out to drinks on a girlās night , makeup what the douche did to you
I am Hard of Hearing and wear Bluetooth-enabled hearing aids to my phone. Dating never comes easy to me when I miss a lot of social cues too.
I think thatās the saddest thing Iāve heard on online dating . Whatās a piece of š© . Donāt even give him a second thought . Not worth your time . Hope you are ok
That guy did a really scummy thing, don't let that get you down. it's not a reflection on you in any way
severe dick..not that big of a deal that you wear a hearing deviceš ...watch hes gonna get older and probably need oneš¤£
Really disgusting from the guy!! People are so fake. Hope you'll find someone who will accept you and love you.
Thatās fucked up , apologizing on behalf of other men
Well damn! Sorry about that. Iād date a deaf girl.. If I was on a date with a deaf girl and her implant batteries died Iād just buy her some more! Truth be told Iām probably better off with a dead girl.. I donāt really need to be heard all the time. ā¤ļøš¤š
I reiterate...a dating app for narcissists
Always helpful when AH identify themselves before you waste too much time on them. OP I am angry for you- even if he felt it wasnāt a match, for whatever reason, what he did is unacceptable. I sorry you had to deal with that.
This guy thinks it's totally cool to have not read the profile, show up to the date, spend 3 hours in a good conversation, then ditch and only pay for his own drinks while letting you wait indefinitely for him to return. When he tells his friends this story, I hope they question if they need him in the friend group right now. If it makes you feel any better, I had a girl cut a date short because she found out that I didn't have a seven-figure income (as in $1 million+).
Sorry that this happend to you honey. One of my best friends had an accident that left him permanently deaf in one ear and he's told me his dating life changed entirely due to it. Now he's got a partner who's the kindest person ever tho! Dont lose hope OP!Ā
This is absolutely horrifying! I am so, so, so sorry this happened to you. You absolutely deserved respect, and for him to even think about trying to justify his actions. Fucking coward. You guys were already having a convo so what changed. Thatās dumb as hell. I hope he rots. For real.
Thatās so stupid, itās the same as walking out on a date because theyāre wearing glasses. Or because you put on a bandaid after getting a cut. That guy is on a very low level of emotional development and empathy. You were lucky to find out so soon! Lots of people get sick or disabled later in life and, a guy like that would leave you when youāre going through a difficult situation. He doesnāt care about anyoneās personality, interests, he only has the capacity to care for himself. Although we also canāt know that, he probably lacks self-awareness as well. I know it hurts but you really dodged a bullet. Not all people got a chance to see who their partner is early on, some only found out years into the relationship.
I am so sorry you went through that. It stings every time I get stood up or get unmatched but I never give up. I can say that I have been in situations where I've been on dates where we don't speak the same language and my phone that I've been useing Google translate the entire time runs out of battery. The first time this happened I did get anxious afraid that I wouldn't be able to keep them entertained. It just took me a moment to realize that I just needed to slow down and have infinite patience, that they liked me I just needed to listen to not just words but body language dancing together or sometimes just hold hands and listen to live music together there's so much to learn from someone just being in person and getting to know how there energy feels. This going forward has helped me on every date haveing confidence that I could have good dates even if we can't talk or if they don't have perfect English.
You dodged a bullet - this dude ditched you during the date š I dont care what country you're from, this is douche-baggery in its worst form tell me what he looks like and I'll punch him in throat
Wtf? He was having a good time and all you had to do was change your implant batteries and things would have been fine? He absolutely shot himself in the foot for no reason.
He is a peice of shit. Don't give up.
What happened by that guy was just really disgusting and vile. Matching and unmatching indeed can be a problem, but this is one notch too far. I have what is called a āhidden disabilityā myself and I find it a really hard thing for me to deal with at times! You are an individual who deserves better and you will get what you want in life no matter what! I have faith in you!
I am a big women. I make sure there are good photos for them to know. Down playing my boobs which are also on par, because sometimes thatās all they see. Maybe do a really nice shot of you with your head tilted and it showing. Losing the assholes to just swiping left is no great loss. You are awesome, but yes most men donāt read while swiping. And while some will read while in texting, itās best to put it in photos.
Hey you dodged a bullet. Sounds like a hes got poor qualities if he cant understand helth issues. Like what happens when you get older and he gets cancer, would you dump him then.
There is no reason for him to care about the implants. You interacted very well on the first half of the date, and you were both having fun. Then to make matters worse, he ghosted you ON A DATE, over such a trivial thing. That says all you need to know about him. Very immature and insecure. Actually, he did you a favor. It could have taken weeks to discover this side of him. With regard to your profile, it is very possible he read it, but maybe wasn't familiar with what cochlear implants are. People have a tendency to skip over stuff they are unfamiliar with.
Please don't give up because of this shitty person's odd interaction. You deserve to find someone, everyone does. Dating is hard though. If I can put one piece of advice that would help, it would be to not put pressure on yourself and just roll with what comes. It's amazing how much easier it gets when you have no expectationsĀ
What a complete loser. Also what a lame deal breaker.
Don't you have MS?
He didnāt deserve you! Blessing in disguise
This exact situation happened to me, from the guy's perspective. She did NOT disclose that she wore hearing aids beforehand. TBH it was an initial shock but she was normal, fun and cute so I quickly forgot about it and we ended up sucking face in the parking lot. Don't let one shitty guy's bad reaction ruin it for you OP
Consider yourself lucky that you saw his true colors sooner rather than later, you're not missing anything
What a coward. How old was he? 5? Such an immature dushbag. Even if he had some issues with you for what ever reason, he could have just ended the date in a normal way. Walked you to your taxi and said fare well. Leaving you sitting there was very rude and shows his immaturity. If he treats all people like that he will never find a serious relationship anyway.
That's wild, even if I didn't realize it I would have so many questions just out of sheer curiosity. I can understand if someone was deaf completely that it would be a deal breaker if learning ASL was required just for basic communication, but since you have an implant to let you hear still and the ASL could come later over time for some situations I don't get the issue. I've never heard of a deafphobic person and I think he's definitely the weird one here.
That guy-(not a man) has zero character. What a POS!
I am so sorry this happened to you! He is an asshole and he should feel ashamed for his behavior!!
Thatās beyond fucked. Even if he wasnāt interested he couldāve bought you another drink and wrapped the night up and explained he didnāt feel a connection. Iām sorry OP.
Ugh! I am so, so, so sorry for how that must make you feel. I hope the next date more than makes up for it
Wow. Just think if you instead said "I have to go the bathroom" and changed the batteries there...he doesn't notice a thing...then a few dates later he finds out why and bails...yikes...you definitely dodged a bullet by being upfront, especially considering you mentioned it on the profile. I don't use that app, but have female friends that got all upset when a guy bailed when suddenly finding out well after that they had kids š kudos to being upfront
Fuck that guy. And I hope heās on Reddit and reads this and realizes what a gross person he is. š¤¢ Hang in there, and better luck on your next Bumble. Youāll definitely win the āworst dateā question on some future date!
I am so sorry that this happened to you. This guy had no sense of basic human decency. So the universe removed his unworthy ass out of your life. So be happy that you are loved by the universe. Also he removed his unworthy self from your life in such a bad manner that if you ever want to give others an example of total ātrashā in face of human, tell them this story. But please do both let actions of a trash, direct your life path. When you meet worthy inspirational people, then it is time for you to take the next step not based on an insignificant trash. What city this happened at? If I may ask
Omfg what a douchebag! In my experience as a girl in dating apps, 90% of dudes donāt bother to read bios. Many just swipe right on everyone and hope for someone to match back. Increases their odds, maybe? Either way, you dodged a bullet. Obviously heās a complete idiot. I am so sorry you had to go through that, no one deserves that. Donāt give up!
It shows one does not simply walk into a bar and find their true match. Honnestly I'm deeply sorry to read this OP but please stay strong reading your story you're honest and upfront about your condition so there's nothing to feel bad about from your side, sadly some people are like this nowadays :( Speaking from personal experiences it can be hard to talk about medical conditions as it tends to scare people away but don't give up keep on looking and I am sure the true one will show up. <3 There's some good in this world OP and it is worth fighting for!!
Some people just don't have any human decency. Absolute scum. I'm sorry this happened to you.
Disgusting! Sorry that happened to you
What a scumbag dude š«
This is legitimately horrendous and beyond cowardly. Sadly people like this exist in the world. But hopefully a small minority. Sorry you had to go through that. Dodged a bullet but still an awful way to dodge the bullet / so many more ways his stunted self could have handled it. Donāt give up hope and in a few months itāll just make for a funny story with your new partner!
OP: This blows. Not cool. Stay faithful. What you have coming is only better now
That dude is a child, you dodged a bullet. Thats awful to go through, you did nothing wrong. There are a lot of assholes out there nowadays, lots of dating horror stories