A deadbeat is one who is capable of meeting his child’s needs, but chooses not to. For eg choosing social engagements over custody, choosing to pay for drinks or holidays or other nonsense over decent maintenance/kids school trips etc.
It's a tricky one to define as I wouldn't class someone as a deadbeat dad just because they didn't contribute financially if they had a good reason they couldn't e.g on disability benefits themselves and unable to work due to health.
However overall I'd say it's a dad not doing his best to contribute to his children's upbringing. Either in terms of financial security, spending time with them, actively parenting, not disappearing, regular and sustained contact etc.
E.g my biological father is a deadbeat dad because he broke up our family though his infidelity, fought tooth and nail to give my mum as little money as possible for our upbringing, didn't keep in regular contact, was emotionally abusive, brought unsafe people into our lives, disappeared often and was unreliable.
His financial abuse was part of it (e.g taking jobs that pay cash in hand illegally so he could claim he was unemployed and unable to pay a penny for us.) But it was also emotional neglect etc, the money wasn't the whole picture.
> However overall I'd say it's a dad not doing his best to contribute to his children's upbringing. Either in terms of financial security, spending time with them, actively parenting, not disappearing, regular and sustained contact etc.
That's a bit of a broad statement, and would probably include the majority of dads I've met on the "actively parenting" side. Deadbeat has to be something closer to nowhere near their best.
I think the word "neglect" you use is perhaps the most important one. A deadbeat dad is someone who actively neglects their children.
It's a spectrum, it goes from only seeing them on their designated weekend and not putting any extra effort in on top, to the other end where they aren't in the child's life at all. Both deadbeats, just one slightly more than the other.
A deadbeat dad I always thought was one who went out of his way to not contribute financially to their kids upbringing, with an implication that they were also not having contact or doing any actual dadding.
My teenagers dad quit his job to not have to pay Child Maintenance, which is 10% of your wage generally. Giving up 90% of your wage to not have to give 10% to your child is hilarious to me. He had to then sell lots of his assets to survive, which again I thought was mildly amusing. He then got a job after she's turned 16 because he misunderstood the cut off and had to pay again, so quit his job again. This, to me, is the definition of a deadbeat dad.
He was taking cash in hand jobs which pay significantly less in between, definitely less than the other jobs even with the 10% reduction, but I suppose that made sense to him.
Traditionally I thought it meant a divorced Dad who refuses to pay child support, but it’s become to mean any Dad who isn’t involved in his child’s life/regularly lets them down etc
A deadbeat is one who is capable of meeting his child’s needs, but chooses not to. For eg choosing social engagements over custody, choosing to pay for drinks or holidays or other nonsense over decent maintenance/kids school trips etc.
This is the best answer
I think these are a few ways to be a deadbeat parent. Just one that comes to mind is a parent who is about but consistently lets the child down.
It's a tricky one to define as I wouldn't class someone as a deadbeat dad just because they didn't contribute financially if they had a good reason they couldn't e.g on disability benefits themselves and unable to work due to health. However overall I'd say it's a dad not doing his best to contribute to his children's upbringing. Either in terms of financial security, spending time with them, actively parenting, not disappearing, regular and sustained contact etc. E.g my biological father is a deadbeat dad because he broke up our family though his infidelity, fought tooth and nail to give my mum as little money as possible for our upbringing, didn't keep in regular contact, was emotionally abusive, brought unsafe people into our lives, disappeared often and was unreliable. His financial abuse was part of it (e.g taking jobs that pay cash in hand illegally so he could claim he was unemployed and unable to pay a penny for us.) But it was also emotional neglect etc, the money wasn't the whole picture.
Bloody hell, this sounds like I wrote this about my dad
> However overall I'd say it's a dad not doing his best to contribute to his children's upbringing. Either in terms of financial security, spending time with them, actively parenting, not disappearing, regular and sustained contact etc. That's a bit of a broad statement, and would probably include the majority of dads I've met on the "actively parenting" side. Deadbeat has to be something closer to nowhere near their best. I think the word "neglect" you use is perhaps the most important one. A deadbeat dad is someone who actively neglects their children.
Personally I think to not be a deadbeat they need to contribute their time, emotional energy and money to the best of their ability.
It's a spectrum, it goes from only seeing them on their designated weekend and not putting any extra effort in on top, to the other end where they aren't in the child's life at all. Both deadbeats, just one slightly more than the other.
I think they're both deadbeats... Just you know on a spectrum of bad to worse.
A deadbeat dad I always thought was one who went out of his way to not contribute financially to their kids upbringing, with an implication that they were also not having contact or doing any actual dadding. My teenagers dad quit his job to not have to pay Child Maintenance, which is 10% of your wage generally. Giving up 90% of your wage to not have to give 10% to your child is hilarious to me. He had to then sell lots of his assets to survive, which again I thought was mildly amusing. He then got a job after she's turned 16 because he misunderstood the cut off and had to pay again, so quit his job again. This, to me, is the definition of a deadbeat dad. He was taking cash in hand jobs which pay significantly less in between, definitely less than the other jobs even with the 10% reduction, but I suppose that made sense to him.
Traditionally I thought it meant a divorced Dad who refuses to pay child support, but it’s become to mean any Dad who isn’t involved in his child’s life/regularly lets them down etc