# A quick reminder to those viewing this post:
1. If you have not done so, **read [the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/progresspics/about/rules)**
2. Being a pervert will get you banned.
3. Messaging OP lewd/inappropriate comments is not okay.
4. OP is a real person. [Don't be an asshole](https://media.giphy.com/media/3oz8xt6aO8l4UjcnXa/giphy.gif).
5. **Report rule breaking comments.**
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/progresspics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
That's what my partner said as well. I'm just a big sensitive baby. I nearly burst into tears our way back home until he said that. Thank you so much for your perspective and kind words!
Most common tips today are not to comment on people’s bodies period.
If you have people in your life, however, that *love* to comment if you’ve gained a little weight but will never mention if you lost any… that’s when you know that’s not a great person to have around you.
I recently went to a graduation party with my family and not one person commented on me losing *70 pounds* since I last saw them. And we were in bathing suits, so there's absolutely no way they didn't notice. But those same family members would openly mention my weight before... it really solidified for me that they're shit people and I won't be coming around anymore.
That’s a clue to a $h!thead. That a people who will constantly talk about how good they look or how trim they got but if you lose weight will just clam up like weight suddenly is super gauche to speak about.
These are all people who exist to make you feel bad because it makes them feel good.
I know how awesome it is when people notice and comment how great you look and how you feel like it’s been for nothing or maybe you don’t look any better when no one brings it up.
But as others have said it can be a bit awkward if it goes the wrong way
I don’t comment because someone might be ill or depressed, or they may gain weight again and feel bad about themselves knowing that everyone thought they looked better when they weighed less.
You look fabulous. They certainly noticed - huge difference! Well done you 😊
I get it love, would have been nice for someone to at least give a compliment. Sometimes saying something like, “gosh, I can’t work out what it is, but you look gorg today!” . When I was pregnant and looking like a whale, people didn’t have a problem telling me I was … “glowing” 😉
Sometimes people don’t say anything about weight loss just in case you’re sick, or have anything else going on.. I’m pretty sure they didn’t mean it in a negative manner
It is, I actually don’t support commenting on people’s weight regardless of the way you think it’s moved. I’m all for stuff like „wow, you look amazing” or „what a glow-up”
I think it’s appropriate for people not to mention it unless you bring it up first. Commenting on someone’s body is a touchy area. You never know how someone will react. (Also if the weight loss is intentional or due to illness.)
Once I complimented someone's weight loss and she was like "thanks......I've been going through some really hard stuff" and now I usually only talk about it with friends that I know are actively trying to lose weight. Otherwise I compliment someone on looking really nice today, nice hair, love that dress, etc...
This reminds me of the Christmas I went home to see my family and was blown away by my brother's weight loss. He was at least 50 pounds lighter.
I asked him his secret, and he came clean about his drug problem. He was wrecking his body, and he was blowing so much money on his habit that he would skip meals most days.
Oh, yeah, loads better
He kicked the drug habit the next summer and started drinking like a fish to replace it. He was convinced he didn't have a problem until he got a DUI, and then went 100% sober. He's been off of everything for about three years now.
Good luck to you, too
I do agree here…I was severely underweight from a. abusive relationship. I can see both sides though and an definitely see how someone who worked hard to lose weight could feel discouraged not receiving any recognition. But you are doing AMAZING, you look AMAZING and honestly, the most important thing is how YOU feel living in YOUR body. You’ve worked hard at this, don’t forget to be proud and celebrate yourself too🫶🏻
I got a lot of negative comments about my weight loss when I went through it. Things like “stop losing weight, you’re losing your curves” and “I think you’re doing drugs.” Actually I’m just too depressed and suicidal to have an appetite and I’m wasting away so fast that I nearly pass out every time I stand up, but thanks for making me feel worse about everything!
Let’s just… not comment on other people’s weight first, yeah?
Commented on a girls weight years ago. She was as thin as I wanted to become and she became very upset because unlike me, she had been trying to gain weight with no success. I don't comment anymore on anyone's weight.
As a person who has gone up and down with my weight throughout the years; I have mixed feelings about being complimented when I’ve lost weight. You know, thinking “are you saying I didn’t look good before” kind of thoughts. Et cetera et cetera.
I absolutely don’t want anyone to notice when I’ve gained weight back so maybe they are just being sensitive to your feelings by not saying anything at all.
They most likely do notice though.
Find it within yourself to give yourself all the kudos you need and never stop remembering that your body thanks you in innumerable ways for losing weight. It’s all worth it! Love yourself and keep on taking care of yourself and find all the inner happiness you deserve.
It could be jealousy, it could be someone who just doesn’t pay attention…..could be anything. Don’t overthink it and keep up the great self care.
Congratulations on your progress 🙂. I’m sure your family noticed the difference.
Personally, I don’t comment on someone’s weight unless they bring it up and want to talk about it.
If you want to talk about it with people, when they ask how you’ve been, you could talk about what you’ve been focusing on with your health. Eg. If you’ve joined a gym, been going for walks, started a new hobby for your health, been cooking different foods, etc.
When friends have complimented my appearance and I can tell it is because of my weight loss, I have told them that I’ve been working on losing weight. I’ve had more direct comments about losing weight as well and I respond by saying something like “I’m working on it” and smile. When people don’t say anything, their facial expressions and body language are usually very telling though. When I had lost about 10kg, my neighbour saw me and she looked very surprised and looked me up and down (not in a creepy way). She didn’t say anything, but her reaction was super obvious.
It doesn’t bother me if they comment or if they don’t say anything, because that isn’t my motivation for losing weight.
I’m assuming OP is Hispanic, and usually there are a group of tias (aunts) there that will bluntly ask if you’ve got a husband yet, ‘why are you gaining so much weight’, ‘how come you don’t have any kids yet’, etc etc.
No no no, don't be disappointed. They definitely all know. Heck, I lost 100 lbs and went to a family wedding and nobody said anything (in-laws, so whatevs). Don't bring it up first. Let them either mention it or wonder in silence how you look so amazing.
My mother would always make a big deal about “how FANTASTIC” I looked at my biggest 256lbs, I now weigh 140 and not a word. It is weird.
You’re doing it for you not them.
I’m sorry it hurt, some people don’t know what to say.
Congratulations on your weight loss! Super proud of you! Wow I'm so sorry that you didn't get one peep. That's just bananas. I always wanted to say that lol
Right back at you. You look Fantastic and I’m sure you feel fantastic.
Maintaining is simple, just keep doing what you’re doing. If you have indulge moments, give yourself permission beforehand and get right back on track next meal. (You’d be surprised how powerful the brain is)
If you start to yo-yo over about 5lbs, that isn’t YOU, it’s the brain and hormones (ghrelin and leptin) trying to get you to regain. Stay the course and increase physical activity a bit, and it will settle down. A new weight norm will happen (in the brain for homeostasis) at about 18 months of weight stability.
You look incredible, beautiful!! 🌺
So true! My birthday was literally a few days ago and I splurged. By splurged I mean half a buttercream cupcake 🤣 but I worked my butt off for that damn cupcake! Eternally grateful for your wise words. I'm absolutely going to burn that into my brain.
I think the bigger you are, the more affirmation people think you need to cope. scrolling social media will make you believe body positivity only applies to big people.
I had to ask my mom to stop commenting on my weight loss once I had shed a significant amount. It was a lot more uncomfortable than I thought it would be and made me feel like she liked me more once I started to shrink. I honestly would rather people not say anything, having your whole family comment on it would be pretty jarring, I would think!
Sometimes people are reluctant to congratulate people if they aren't done losing yet.
Generally people are waiting for a signal that you've hit your ultimate goal in order to avoid having you fall into a dopamine trap that makes you stop trying.
You did well, keep it up!
I am starting to think this is the norm. My close friends and family don’t seem to notice or cheer me on in the least. A few co-workers knew I was working at losing weight and are encouraging and have noticed changes but even upon sending progress pics to my mom after getting to 39lbs lost,not even a comment—she just left me on read since last night.
You are doing awesome—and this is a great place for encouraging words. I know it can be disappointing when those we love don’t cheer us on so,cheer yourself on because you deserve it and you rock!
Sometimes I feel like your own family and friends are jealous when they see you looking better and doing better. I remember one time I lost weight and everyone was telling me I looked sick but in reality I was in a healthy body range for my height even my doctor said so.
You just have to do what’s best for yourself. Remember how you look in the mirror every morning take a picture and then a couple months. Compare that picture with your current picture and you’ll realize how much progress you’re making. It’s OK to doubt yourself. Don’t doubt your progress. You have done an amazing job so far keep up the great work.
Thank you so much! I'm glad I started taking these before pics because some days I wake up and look in the mirror and see the same bloated face in my before pic. Today seeing my current pic side by side keeps me motivated now more than ever.
Thank you!
I had to REALLY hit rock bottom before making a real change. I was super depressed, miserable, even suicidal. I kept ruminating in some awful childhood traumas on repeat. But then I kept making baby steps. I don't want to babble on too much but I focused on my mental health first so I started meditating daily and got back into skincare.
That eventually turned into me being conscious of what I ate so I drastically cut sugar and carbs from my diet. I started eating keto. I know it's not for everyone but it truly worked for me and I enjoy it. I eat a lot of baked chicken, lean ground meat, fish at least once a week with a vegetable of choice. Found my love for feta.
I make sure to take 10-12k steps daily and do some form of exercise a few days a week, Fitness Blender is one of my favorite channels but I dabble in others occasionally.
I'm agoraphobic so I almost never leave the house unless I absolutely have to but working my way on taking walks outdoors or to the store more each week.
Edited to add: I drink 3 liters of water a day. Literally nothing but water no exceptions.
I've been home a lot after getting laid off and even with going for an hour walk outside each day I struggle with hitting 10k steps a day. How do you manage to get them all in from home?
When we moved here my genius of a partner turned our living into a ping pong room. At first it irritated me but I've grown to love it. So I walk around that while watching TV - which is in the dining room. Both decently big rooms. Eventually, I bought a cheap treadmill.
You look AMAZING, OP. You look beautiful in both photos, but it's so nice to hear that it's an amazing headspace that sparked (and is reflected in) the second picture. You should be so proud of yourself, you've done such a good job!
I’m down 160lbs. Some people in my life still don’t acknowledge it. Not sure if it’s because they don’t want to offend me. Or. As I suspect. Some people don’t like to acknowledge your progress because it shows how they haven’t made progress. At any rate. Congratulations!
That's insane! 160lbs is no small feat! Huge congratulations to you for accomplishing that!! I'm constantly fighting against my intrusive thoughts thinking maybe that extended family just plain hate me but I'm starting to see now they definitely don't and they likely just didn't want to risk causing any offense. I'm painfully shy and suffer from crippling social anxiety so that likely has something to do with their aversion.
Thank you!
I can imagine that is a big part of it. I don’t say anything to most people even family about weight unless I see an opening especially women because I know it’s touchy for some. I’d hate to offend.
For me. It’s impossible to offend me. lol. I want the recognition. On the other side of that. Then people start to ask questions and they don’t like your answers. So often doing your thing and being left alone is best.
You're very sweet, thank you! I also started gua sha twice a day to my face so I'm not sure if that was a direct impact and not just weight loss. Bare minimum, it is very relaxing.
You look quite beautiful - congratulations on the health gains! You have clearly flipped that switch in your head to be good to yourself. 😊
Your face looks noticably sculpted - can you share re the gua sha? I looked it up and there are so many youtube videos, can you point me in the right direction?
Sooo happy to answer this one!
So in my skincare routine after the final step (facial oil):
I specifically did Tina Engeo's videos. I did 2 of them:
[Simple Gua Sha Follow Along Tutorial](https://youtu.be/OHK38luEa2A?si=DQL0vKbCmgQ4hquj)
[Gua Sha For Double Chin](https://youtu.be/IIDRyTrBP00?si=a5DFWZUr3hjKc4IC).
I know it sounds like overkill and it probably is but I thoroughly enjoyed doing these. I do them once in the morning and once in the night time before I went to bed. I always made sure to drink at least 8oz of water at the end. And no, I'm not 100% consistent on it but more often than not, I start and end my day doing it.
You are a diamond, thank you so much. I'm really pleased for you, that you've succeeded. Please keep nourishing yourself, heart, body and soul. It's so hard being fat, you know it, so don't stop that self-care. 💐
And goodness that Double Chin Remover video is clearly working. 😂 🤗 🤩
I appreciate it thanks! Trying to keep up with this momentum after sooo many failed attempts the past 5 years. I NEVER want to look that awful ever again.
The same happened to me after losing 35 lbs. I traveled to see family in Mexico and Houston earlier this year. No one mentioned anything and I felt bummed about it too. My husband reminded me that some people are just being more sensitive to a persons weight. Especially since I am not one to comment on a persons weight loss or gain in any form.
It is better for you to keep yourself accountable and working on feeling great with each lb lost. This journey is for you to begin with. Good luck on your continued weight loss!
Well *I* can see a ton of difference, as can anyone with functioning eyes in their head. Amazing progress and clearly not without hard work. Congratulations!
Some people don’t like to acknowledge it out loud for a variety of reasons.
But I get it, a few “you look great by the way” go a long way on the ego!
You look great by the way! :) keep it up!
Great job!!! You look amazing
So i never comment on someone's weight loss/gain unless they specifically ask "do you see a change?" And even then I just say yeah I see it, you've lost some weight. My cousin was trying to lose weight a few years ago and I really encouraged her, would make comments every time I saw her, would compare her progress pics etc, telling her how much better she looked now that she was skinnier(she had always been on the bigger side her whole life). I didn't realise that everyone in her life was doing the same, and she ended up with a really bad eating disorder. That was around 7 years ago and I still feel really bad about it. Just to give you a suggestion as to why your family probably didn't comment. Don't sweat it, you're doing a great job.
I definitely can relate! My (now ex) lost 10lbs do to not eating cause of stress at work. I have lost almost 45 lbs by dieting and going to the gym. At a family gathering everyone talked about how good he looked etc etc. Not a single person mentioned a thing about me. It really hurts my feelings because I've been working so damn hard to get to where I am and no one said a thing. However, he loses 10 lbs because of not eating due to stress and everyone cheers for him?
I just had to remind myself I am losing weight and being healthy for me, nobody else. So I need to learn to congratulate myself for my accomplishments.
I'm so sorry that happened. Wtf is with your ex not having your back? Well, an ex for a reason amirite? I, for one, am absolutely proud of you! Your hard work deserves to be acknowledged! And you're 1000% right that the weight loss is for no one else but yourself. I'm actually a person who shudders at the thought of being the center of attention so my intent wasn't for EVERYONE to say it but just 1 comment or acknowledgment would have made a world of difference to me. But I'll live.
And I am proud of you! It's not that we want attention for what we are doing because at the end of the day it's for us and not anyone else. However, just one person noticing or acknowledging is quite nice. It doesn't help that body dysmorphia kicks in a lot and you can't see your progress at times. It's nice knowing that someone can see it. My ex is a very "all eyes on me" type and over the years it got worse and always ended up trying to one up me on everything. I'm guessing that's why he didn't speak up for me. You are doing fantastic though! Keep up the good work and again I'm so proud of you!
There’s two reasons why…
They find it insensitive cause bringing up weight loss might be insensitive
Or
They are jealous/envious of your weight loss and don’t want to congratulate you.
I’m assuming you’re Latina, they didn’t mention your weight loss cause they’re a bunch of haters. At least that’s how it goes for gatherings at my Abuelita’s. Congrats. I’m 14 lbs down. Hope to lose another 30. Thanks for the motivation.
I have chronic illness and lost a significant amount of weight from fatigue and loss of appetite. When people compliment my weight loss I always make sure to make it extremely awkward for them. "You look great!" "I feel awful." "Did you lose weight?" "No, I developed a chronic illness."
Lack of commenting is just people being sensitive. If you bring it up in a positive way, it will give others to courage to compliment your efforts. But when it doubt, don't comment on people's bodies, y'know?
edit: for the record, you look fantastic and happy! I'd be shocked if people didn't notice! I think they're just being polite.
This it really hits home. Or they'll make a comment and then you go you do realize who you're talking to and they'll then one up and say well you get it and then you pull out your phone and you show the pictures of what you look like a few years ago and it's like do you want to restate what you just said to me. And it's like they're getting offended that you're not agreeing with the way they say things and it's like hey no you can't be the judge you can't be saying this. It's like they lose their filter so some people will just not speak sometimes it's really weird. And yes the dumb comments that you hear just makes you do like a triple take you look at them going Wait what.
You look Hispanic, and I feel like most Hispanic people (especially moms/dads/aunts/uncles/grandparents) are pretty critical of the younger generation in their family. Not typically supportive and encouraging, rather challenging and dismissive. They don’t tend to recognize and cheer on accomplishments as often as white and black people’s families. Maybe ignoring your weight loss could be attributed to that. Also, congratulations on the transformation! Huge face gains 👊🏼
Omg can your family be any more jealous? Amazing progress - this internet stranger is proud of you!
And no one mentioned anything because they are jealous lolololol.
Can be a plethora of reasons. Jealousy (not likely in a group). They may also see you often, so have seen the progress in real-time (not likely)
Or, they may just not want to say anything.
Or none of the above.
Truth is....it's obviously a superb transformation, so you'll have to make do with us saying it.
Family aside... surely others have complimented you?
I know when I hit the gym, once I see results (I'm genuinely not in great shape), the comments come. I frequently notice people checking out my arms, if the get a little more developed.... I really need to get back to it
I think you’ve _obviously_ lost weight, but I don’t know you and wouldn’t want to comment unless I knew you’d been working to that end. Keep up the great work & drop the worry!!
Lots of people dislike their weight loss being commented on so I think it's best to bring it up yourself. You look great and everyone noticed don't worry
I first focused on self love and improving my mental health like meditating and finding hobbies I love like skincare and DIY stuff. And then I started eating keto which was surprisingly easy for me to transition despite having a history of binge eating. I walk 10-12k steps every day while using the StepBet app to motivate me. And I exercise a few days a week from various workouts on YouTube.
I’m one of those people it’s really awkward to ask about weight. People who ask put me in an awkward situation where I have to lie or I’m sick of lying and I tell them I can’t keep anything down and I can only manage to eat a meal a day. Two if I’m lucky.
I promise these people just realize talking about weight loss can potentially be very awkward and don’t want to potentially make you uncomfortable.
Find a way to bring up your weight loss in conversation with them and I’m sure you’ll get the validation you want and deserve.
I’m sorry no one told you how awesome you’ve done! My guess is they felt it wasn’t their place to comment on their body, but I PROMISE people noticed. You look beautiful!
ITS HILARIOUS, I also had a transformation like you (amazing work btw, you look gorgeous) and NO ONE WOULD MENTION IT. It drove me wild.
Like I worked so hard MF-ers, just say I look cuter 😭
We have the same, exact stats! Congrats to us! Very few people have said anything to me but I know they can see it. I think they are being polite and are being sensitive (even if I want them to say something--haha). You look beautiful, before and now, and I can see a big difference!
I never ever make a comment on someone’s weight unless they bring up that they’re explicitly trying to lose. Medications, mental health, illness, etc. can all cause fluctuations in weight. It can be very hurtful to be complimented on weight loss when it’s unintentional.
Those same people would notice 5 pounds gained though and would point it out in a heartbeat don’t worry about them focus on your own health and journey you look great
I love each and every comment and DM from everyone! I had a busy day with sis in law flying in right when I posted this so I'm sorry I'm lagging in replying to everyone. It truly brings a tear to my eye how incredibly nice and supportive everyone is. I was utterly terrified of posting but glad I did. Sis in law was actually the person that finally said something!
Family can be the worst sometimes believe it or not sometimes they’re the most jealous of your doing well. you look absolutely amazingly wonderful! I’m very proud of you! Just know by them not saying something speaks volumes on how incredibly well you’re doing!
Better to say nothing than what a cousin by marriage shouted to me once in a busy Nordstrom. “WOW, YOU USED TO BE AS BIG AS A HOUSE!”
PS: Congrats on your hard work. You look beautiful. 👏
A couple of days ago someone complained that she did get comments on her weight loss. So basically if you comment you’re fucked, if you don’t comment you’re also fucked. Can’t win either way…
I will never bring up someone’s weight loss unless they indicate that it was intentional. I know too many people who lost weight and “looked great!” due to stress or trauma in their lives, or medical issues.
You look amazing and I’m sure people noticed but didn’t want to make an awkward comment.
Please don’t take it personal. Especially if you come from a loving, supportive family. They might not say anything, for fear of your feelings being hurt. However, I also understand being hurt. You’ve made great progress, and it’s normal to want support! You DO look amazing, you are a beautiful lady 🤩
I never point out peoples’ weight loss because there’s always a chance the weight loss is due to illness or stress or some other difficult life circumstance. People were probably just being cautious.
There is a big difference though, and you look great!
Hi OP! I’ve lost 145 lbs and find that people are very intentional about the way they either do or do not bring up the weight loss. Lots of people due to age or culture don’t think it’s acceptable to talk about. I see both sides, it’s nice to be encouraged for our hard work but I never want to believe I hear you that you are better because you weigh less now. It’s complicated but keep up the good work!
I've had a few people say that they can see it and they don't want to say anything and then I've had people make comments and their backwards comments when you say the little steps you've done and under their breath they'll say it must be nice. Sometimes the people we think will support us the most or the ones that actually will hold us back. Sometimes just sometimes when people see somebody else achieving something that they want to but aren't willing to put in the time you can see the results of how they treat people. If nobody has said it I want to say that I'm extremely proud of you you've done amazing job and all that matters is how you feel about yourself in the end.
I don't say it because I worry I may come across as offensive but I usually say something like "wow you look amazing" but usually I try to avoid weight reference.
I commented on the weight loss of my landlord saying how good he looked; it turned out he had cancer and died within a few months. Needless to say, I don’t make any comments unless the person brings up their weight loss themselves.
You look fantastic! And like other commenters have said, people may just not speak their thoughts out loud. I've often thought that someone looks like they've lost weight, but feel that it would be awkward to comment as it implies that they had weight to lose in the first place, or that their weight is something I'm paying attention to. Or maybe I'm wrong or misremembering, they were actually just bloated last time but now I've put into their head that they should be on some kind of weight loss journey. So generally I just don't say anything, unless it's SUPER obvious. But even then, you never know if the reason for losing it was due to an illness, mental health issues or whatnot, so it's still daunting.
What I'm teaching myself here is that I should just tell people when they look great without pinning it to their weight and leave it at that.
You look good I wouldn’t drop another 20lb pounds, honestly I would suggest you stay at the weight you’re at. But that’s just my opinion, I understand as individuals we are never content with our weight or the way we look but I’m sure you’re everyone noticed. But like other have said people get jealous or just want to stay messing, don’t even bother with them.
Two things - did you dress well or did you dress "loose"? sometimes women lose weight and dress a bit off other than that I bet it is jealousy!! I saw a girl that was really heavy six months ago and I was really impressed and asked her about it and she was happy to talk about it. most of the time when we lose weight we're happy when people notice. Keep going!! You're probably doing much better than them could be part of the problem, they don't feel good about themselves. Even if you didn't lose 20 more pounds you look beautiful and I bet are so much healthier overall.
I don't dress loose in general if anything I hide my shame. I've been known to wear long sleeves in hot weather but it was more of a coping mechanism than anything. I do wear mostly black. Part of the uncomfortability is that I definitely don't share the same religious views as them and they probably picked up on that quickly
TMI but I do have self harm scars from a long time ago so I try to have it out of sight. I can't tell ya how many people give me shit for looking like a weirdo for long sleeves in 95+ temps.
It's become taboo to comment on someone's weight. People don't always know whether it was intentional or due to physical or mental illness. You look noticeably different. People definitely noticed.
Girl I can only see your face here and the change is insane - good on you! You’ve totally inspired me! You are looking (and I bet feeling) fantastic - keep up the good work 😊
Some people don’t like their weight mentioned, even when they’ve purposefully lost some. Everyone is different and they were being polite. Be thankful that you don’t have a family who calls you “fat”, “skinny”, or contributes to any disorders you may have. Always do something as important as a weight loss journey for yourself and never for validation from anyone. Your progress is for you.
This just happened to me this past weekend (4 days ago) I went from 298 to 254 after 7 injections. From a size 22-24, 3-4X to a size 14/Large and nobody noticed. I was so discouraged. It's weird bc I still look the same when I see myself in the mirror but the scale and my clothes say other wise. I never really took pictures before, I'm so glad you had pics to show your progress! Keep up the good work, we're in this together and in the end, it will be worth it to ourselves even if nobody else says a word. This achievement is for our own personal journey! Best of luck!
I'm so sorry no one said anything. Congratulations on your weight loss!!! Without a doubt, you're a much healthier person than before and the clothes are absolutely a marvelous indicator of that! I still struggle with the mirror thing too but we are our own worst critics as the saying goes. If you haven't taken a picture already definitely do it now. You're on the up and up! Body measurements are a great indicator too, I highly encourage that. I measure monthly.
All these comments are giving me great insight on why people don't bring it up. I'm not always great at gauging social cues on what's the right thing to say or not but it's starting to knock some sense into me.
Thank you!! I would never take pics, but I will because your words make sense. I'm the type to immediately be like, "oh you look great" or "whatever you're doing, keep it up". I always thought that was encouraging but now I realize, what if they lost weight due to an illness- so is it really great?? That's the ONLY reason I hesitate but if it's close family/friends, I typically will always acknowledge them if I see the change ❤
First off, buy your family glasses. It is night and day. Your hard work has paid off. As long as you notice and benefit, don't let their lack of attention bring you down. You look great!
One thing I've been doing is going to the store and counting up boxes of butter. In your case 40 boxes. That's all the weight you've lost. I bet you'll be surprised, and it filters out dysmorphia.
I cried when my own mother who caused most of my body dysphoria and early eating disorders by calling me chunky in my teens didn’t comment when I lost 40 lbs. I confronted her about it and she said she learned it could be unwanted remarks. Couldn’t believe she finally shut her mouth the one time I wanted her to notice my weight lol. But great job btw!!!
That's absolutely horrid I'm utterly sorry she treated you awful. You deserve so much better! What kind of mother doesn't compliment their own child's 40 pound loss?! I'm incredibly proud of your weight loss I know it sure as fuck wasn't easy!
I am starting to think this is the norm. My close friends and family don’t seem to notice or cheer me on in the least. A few co-workers knew I was working at losing weight and are encouraging and have noticed changes but even upon sending progress pics to my mom after getting to 39lbs lost,not even a comment—she just left me on read since last night.
You are doing awesome—and this is a great place for encouraging words. I know it can be disappointing when those we love don’t cheer us on so,cheer yourself on because you deserve it and you rock!
I am starting to think this is the norm. My close friends and family don’t seem to notice or cheer me on in the least. A few co-workers knew I was working at losing weight and are encouraging and have noticed changes but even upon sending progress pics to my mom after getting to 39lbs lost,not even a comment—she just left me on read since last night.
You are doing awesome—and this is a great place for encouraging words. I know it can be disappointing when those we love don’t cheer us on so,cheer yourself on because you deserve it and you rock!
# A quick reminder to those viewing this post: 1. If you have not done so, **read [the rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/progresspics/about/rules)** 2. Being a pervert will get you banned. 3. Messaging OP lewd/inappropriate comments is not okay. 4. OP is a real person. [Don't be an asshole](https://media.giphy.com/media/3oz8xt6aO8l4UjcnXa/giphy.gif). 5. **Report rule breaking comments.** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/progresspics) if you have any questions or concerns.*
they probably see it, they just didn't comment, can be an awkward thing to bring up. but great work!
That's what my partner said as well. I'm just a big sensitive baby. I nearly burst into tears our way back home until he said that. Thank you so much for your perspective and kind words!
Most common tips today are not to comment on people’s bodies period. If you have people in your life, however, that *love* to comment if you’ve gained a little weight but will never mention if you lost any… that’s when you know that’s not a great person to have around you.
I recently went to a graduation party with my family and not one person commented on me losing *70 pounds* since I last saw them. And we were in bathing suits, so there's absolutely no way they didn't notice. But those same family members would openly mention my weight before... it really solidified for me that they're shit people and I won't be coming around anymore.
That’s a clue to a $h!thead. That a people who will constantly talk about how good they look or how trim they got but if you lose weight will just clam up like weight suddenly is super gauche to speak about. These are all people who exist to make you feel bad because it makes them feel good.
Sorry you experienced that and here I was feeling so discouraged bc my family didn't notice my 45lb loss. Keep up the good work!!!
I'm starting to feel this way. I think I needed to read this! Thank you!!
I know how awesome it is when people notice and comment how great you look and how you feel like it’s been for nothing or maybe you don’t look any better when no one brings it up. But as others have said it can be a bit awkward if it goes the wrong way
I don’t comment because someone might be ill or depressed, or they may gain weight again and feel bad about themselves knowing that everyone thought they looked better when they weighed less. You look fabulous. They certainly noticed - huge difference! Well done you 😊
Yeah dad lost weight with terminal cancer. You never know the cause of weight loss.
I get it love, would have been nice for someone to at least give a compliment. Sometimes saying something like, “gosh, I can’t work out what it is, but you look gorg today!” . When I was pregnant and looking like a whale, people didn’t have a problem telling me I was … “glowing” 😉
Sometimes people don’t say anything about weight loss just in case you’re sick, or have anything else going on.. I’m pretty sure they didn’t mean it in a negative manner
Girly you look gorgeous I have body issues so I don't ever mention weight to family maybe it was something similar
It's totally possible they are jealous, and envy your progress.
It is, I actually don’t support commenting on people’s weight regardless of the way you think it’s moved. I’m all for stuff like „wow, you look amazing” or „what a glow-up”
I think it’s appropriate for people not to mention it unless you bring it up first. Commenting on someone’s body is a touchy area. You never know how someone will react. (Also if the weight loss is intentional or due to illness.)
Once I complimented someone's weight loss and she was like "thanks......I've been going through some really hard stuff" and now I usually only talk about it with friends that I know are actively trying to lose weight. Otherwise I compliment someone on looking really nice today, nice hair, love that dress, etc...
This reminds me of the Christmas I went home to see my family and was blown away by my brother's weight loss. He was at least 50 pounds lighter. I asked him his secret, and he came clean about his drug problem. He was wrecking his body, and he was blowing so much money on his habit that he would skip meals most days.
From a recovering addict who's been there, I truly hope he's doing better now.
Oh, yeah, loads better He kicked the drug habit the next summer and started drinking like a fish to replace it. He was convinced he didn't have a problem until he got a DUI, and then went 100% sober. He's been off of everything for about three years now. Good luck to you, too
Thank you!
I do agree here…I was severely underweight from a. abusive relationship. I can see both sides though and an definitely see how someone who worked hard to lose weight could feel discouraged not receiving any recognition. But you are doing AMAZING, you look AMAZING and honestly, the most important thing is how YOU feel living in YOUR body. You’ve worked hard at this, don’t forget to be proud and celebrate yourself too🫶🏻
Same here. I complimented on a milkman’s lost in my country and he said with a forlorn face, “I was severely sick for six months”, I was like “ohh..”
I got a lot of negative comments about my weight loss when I went through it. Things like “stop losing weight, you’re losing your curves” and “I think you’re doing drugs.” Actually I’m just too depressed and suicidal to have an appetite and I’m wasting away so fast that I nearly pass out every time I stand up, but thanks for making me feel worse about everything! Let’s just… not comment on other people’s weight first, yeah?
Commented on a girls weight years ago. She was as thin as I wanted to become and she became very upset because unlike me, she had been trying to gain weight with no success. I don't comment anymore on anyone's weight.
As a person who has gone up and down with my weight throughout the years; I have mixed feelings about being complimented when I’ve lost weight. You know, thinking “are you saying I didn’t look good before” kind of thoughts. Et cetera et cetera. I absolutely don’t want anyone to notice when I’ve gained weight back so maybe they are just being sensitive to your feelings by not saying anything at all. They most likely do notice though. Find it within yourself to give yourself all the kudos you need and never stop remembering that your body thanks you in innumerable ways for losing weight. It’s all worth it! Love yourself and keep on taking care of yourself and find all the inner happiness you deserve. It could be jealousy, it could be someone who just doesn’t pay attention…..could be anything. Don’t overthink it and keep up the great self care.
Congratulations on your progress 🙂. I’m sure your family noticed the difference. Personally, I don’t comment on someone’s weight unless they bring it up and want to talk about it. If you want to talk about it with people, when they ask how you’ve been, you could talk about what you’ve been focusing on with your health. Eg. If you’ve joined a gym, been going for walks, started a new hobby for your health, been cooking different foods, etc. When friends have complimented my appearance and I can tell it is because of my weight loss, I have told them that I’ve been working on losing weight. I’ve had more direct comments about losing weight as well and I respond by saying something like “I’m working on it” and smile. When people don’t say anything, their facial expressions and body language are usually very telling though. When I had lost about 10kg, my neighbour saw me and she looked very surprised and looked me up and down (not in a creepy way). She didn’t say anything, but her reaction was super obvious. It doesn’t bother me if they comment or if they don’t say anything, because that isn’t my motivation for losing weight.
It’s kind of rude to mention someone’s weight changes (in either direction). Discussing people’s bodies in general is kind of rude tbh
I’m assuming OP is Hispanic, and usually there are a group of tias (aunts) there that will bluntly ask if you’ve got a husband yet, ‘why are you gaining so much weight’, ‘how come you don’t have any kids yet’, etc etc.
No no no, don't be disappointed. They definitely all know. Heck, I lost 100 lbs and went to a family wedding and nobody said anything (in-laws, so whatevs). Don't bring it up first. Let them either mention it or wonder in silence how you look so amazing.
My mother would always make a big deal about “how FANTASTIC” I looked at my biggest 256lbs, I now weigh 140 and not a word. It is weird. You’re doing it for you not them. I’m sorry it hurt, some people don’t know what to say.
Congratulations on your weight loss! Super proud of you! Wow I'm so sorry that you didn't get one peep. That's just bananas. I always wanted to say that lol
Right back at you. You look Fantastic and I’m sure you feel fantastic. Maintaining is simple, just keep doing what you’re doing. If you have indulge moments, give yourself permission beforehand and get right back on track next meal. (You’d be surprised how powerful the brain is) If you start to yo-yo over about 5lbs, that isn’t YOU, it’s the brain and hormones (ghrelin and leptin) trying to get you to regain. Stay the course and increase physical activity a bit, and it will settle down. A new weight norm will happen (in the brain for homeostasis) at about 18 months of weight stability. You look incredible, beautiful!! 🌺
So true! My birthday was literally a few days ago and I splurged. By splurged I mean half a buttercream cupcake 🤣 but I worked my butt off for that damn cupcake! Eternally grateful for your wise words. I'm absolutely going to burn that into my brain.
I think the bigger you are, the more affirmation people think you need to cope. scrolling social media will make you believe body positivity only applies to big people.
A very noticeable difference
I had to ask my mom to stop commenting on my weight loss once I had shed a significant amount. It was a lot more uncomfortable than I thought it would be and made me feel like she liked me more once I started to shrink. I honestly would rather people not say anything, having your whole family comment on it would be pretty jarring, I would think!
Sometimes people are reluctant to congratulate people if they aren't done losing yet. Generally people are waiting for a signal that you've hit your ultimate goal in order to avoid having you fall into a dopamine trap that makes you stop trying. You did well, keep it up!
Great point. I had a few hiccups along the way too and almost stopped. Thank you for your kind words!
I am starting to think this is the norm. My close friends and family don’t seem to notice or cheer me on in the least. A few co-workers knew I was working at losing weight and are encouraging and have noticed changes but even upon sending progress pics to my mom after getting to 39lbs lost,not even a comment—she just left me on read since last night. You are doing awesome—and this is a great place for encouraging words. I know it can be disappointing when those we love don’t cheer us on so,cheer yourself on because you deserve it and you rock!
I called my mom the other day to tell her I’d run a 5k and was so proud to tell her, she said “oh….wow…have you been lifting though?” 🤦🏼♀️
Congrats on that 5k!! That takes time, dedication and training. You don’t need to lift unless you WANT to. Even walking is AMAZING for the body.
Sometimes I feel like your own family and friends are jealous when they see you looking better and doing better. I remember one time I lost weight and everyone was telling me I looked sick but in reality I was in a healthy body range for my height even my doctor said so.
You just have to do what’s best for yourself. Remember how you look in the mirror every morning take a picture and then a couple months. Compare that picture with your current picture and you’ll realize how much progress you’re making. It’s OK to doubt yourself. Don’t doubt your progress. You have done an amazing job so far keep up the great work.
Thank you so much! I'm glad I started taking these before pics because some days I wake up and look in the mirror and see the same bloated face in my before pic. Today seeing my current pic side by side keeps me motivated now more than ever.
good job! what helped you?
Thank you! I had to REALLY hit rock bottom before making a real change. I was super depressed, miserable, even suicidal. I kept ruminating in some awful childhood traumas on repeat. But then I kept making baby steps. I don't want to babble on too much but I focused on my mental health first so I started meditating daily and got back into skincare. That eventually turned into me being conscious of what I ate so I drastically cut sugar and carbs from my diet. I started eating keto. I know it's not for everyone but it truly worked for me and I enjoy it. I eat a lot of baked chicken, lean ground meat, fish at least once a week with a vegetable of choice. Found my love for feta. I make sure to take 10-12k steps daily and do some form of exercise a few days a week, Fitness Blender is one of my favorite channels but I dabble in others occasionally. I'm agoraphobic so I almost never leave the house unless I absolutely have to but working my way on taking walks outdoors or to the store more each week. Edited to add: I drink 3 liters of water a day. Literally nothing but water no exceptions.
I've been home a lot after getting laid off and even with going for an hour walk outside each day I struggle with hitting 10k steps a day. How do you manage to get them all in from home?
When we moved here my genius of a partner turned our living into a ping pong room. At first it irritated me but I've grown to love it. So I walk around that while watching TV - which is in the dining room. Both decently big rooms. Eventually, I bought a cheap treadmill.
Oh good idea!
You look AMAZING, OP. You look beautiful in both photos, but it's so nice to hear that it's an amazing headspace that sparked (and is reflected in) the second picture. You should be so proud of yourself, you've done such a good job!
Great home workout. I love Sydney Houdeshell Cummings she is on YouTube for free. Amazing series. She has maybe 2,000 videos.
I’m down 160lbs. Some people in my life still don’t acknowledge it. Not sure if it’s because they don’t want to offend me. Or. As I suspect. Some people don’t like to acknowledge your progress because it shows how they haven’t made progress. At any rate. Congratulations!
That's insane! 160lbs is no small feat! Huge congratulations to you for accomplishing that!! I'm constantly fighting against my intrusive thoughts thinking maybe that extended family just plain hate me but I'm starting to see now they definitely don't and they likely just didn't want to risk causing any offense. I'm painfully shy and suffer from crippling social anxiety so that likely has something to do with their aversion.
Thank you! I can imagine that is a big part of it. I don’t say anything to most people even family about weight unless I see an opening especially women because I know it’s touchy for some. I’d hate to offend. For me. It’s impossible to offend me. lol. I want the recognition. On the other side of that. Then people start to ask questions and they don’t like your answers. So often doing your thing and being left alone is best.
And wow. Your face gains are amazing.
You're very sweet, thank you! I also started gua sha twice a day to my face so I'm not sure if that was a direct impact and not just weight loss. Bare minimum, it is very relaxing.
You look quite beautiful - congratulations on the health gains! You have clearly flipped that switch in your head to be good to yourself. 😊 Your face looks noticably sculpted - can you share re the gua sha? I looked it up and there are so many youtube videos, can you point me in the right direction?
Sooo happy to answer this one! So in my skincare routine after the final step (facial oil): I specifically did Tina Engeo's videos. I did 2 of them: [Simple Gua Sha Follow Along Tutorial](https://youtu.be/OHK38luEa2A?si=DQL0vKbCmgQ4hquj) [Gua Sha For Double Chin](https://youtu.be/IIDRyTrBP00?si=a5DFWZUr3hjKc4IC). I know it sounds like overkill and it probably is but I thoroughly enjoyed doing these. I do them once in the morning and once in the night time before I went to bed. I always made sure to drink at least 8oz of water at the end. And no, I'm not 100% consistent on it but more often than not, I start and end my day doing it.
You are a diamond, thank you so much. I'm really pleased for you, that you've succeeded. Please keep nourishing yourself, heart, body and soul. It's so hard being fat, you know it, so don't stop that self-care. 💐 And goodness that Double Chin Remover video is clearly working. 😂 🤗 🤩
I appreciate it thanks! Trying to keep up with this momentum after sooo many failed attempts the past 5 years. I NEVER want to look that awful ever again.
The same happened to me after losing 35 lbs. I traveled to see family in Mexico and Houston earlier this year. No one mentioned anything and I felt bummed about it too. My husband reminded me that some people are just being more sensitive to a persons weight. Especially since I am not one to comment on a persons weight loss or gain in any form. It is better for you to keep yourself accountable and working on feeling great with each lb lost. This journey is for you to begin with. Good luck on your continued weight loss!
you look great!
Well *I* can see a ton of difference, as can anyone with functioning eyes in their head. Amazing progress and clearly not without hard work. Congratulations!
Some people don’t like to acknowledge it out loud for a variety of reasons. But I get it, a few “you look great by the way” go a long way on the ego! You look great by the way! :) keep it up!
Great job!!! You look amazing So i never comment on someone's weight loss/gain unless they specifically ask "do you see a change?" And even then I just say yeah I see it, you've lost some weight. My cousin was trying to lose weight a few years ago and I really encouraged her, would make comments every time I saw her, would compare her progress pics etc, telling her how much better she looked now that she was skinnier(she had always been on the bigger side her whole life). I didn't realise that everyone in her life was doing the same, and she ended up with a really bad eating disorder. That was around 7 years ago and I still feel really bad about it. Just to give you a suggestion as to why your family probably didn't comment. Don't sweat it, you're doing a great job.
I definitely can relate! My (now ex) lost 10lbs do to not eating cause of stress at work. I have lost almost 45 lbs by dieting and going to the gym. At a family gathering everyone talked about how good he looked etc etc. Not a single person mentioned a thing about me. It really hurts my feelings because I've been working so damn hard to get to where I am and no one said a thing. However, he loses 10 lbs because of not eating due to stress and everyone cheers for him? I just had to remind myself I am losing weight and being healthy for me, nobody else. So I need to learn to congratulate myself for my accomplishments.
I'm so sorry that happened. Wtf is with your ex not having your back? Well, an ex for a reason amirite? I, for one, am absolutely proud of you! Your hard work deserves to be acknowledged! And you're 1000% right that the weight loss is for no one else but yourself. I'm actually a person who shudders at the thought of being the center of attention so my intent wasn't for EVERYONE to say it but just 1 comment or acknowledgment would have made a world of difference to me. But I'll live.
And I am proud of you! It's not that we want attention for what we are doing because at the end of the day it's for us and not anyone else. However, just one person noticing or acknowledging is quite nice. It doesn't help that body dysmorphia kicks in a lot and you can't see your progress at times. It's nice knowing that someone can see it. My ex is a very "all eyes on me" type and over the years it got worse and always ended up trying to one up me on everything. I'm guessing that's why he didn't speak up for me. You are doing fantastic though! Keep up the good work and again I'm so proud of you!
Congrats!!
There’s two reasons why… They find it insensitive cause bringing up weight loss might be insensitive Or They are jealous/envious of your weight loss and don’t want to congratulate you.
Well, if I was there I would have said…you look absolutely gorgeous. I’m not sure what you’ve been up to, but it looks good on you! 🩷😊
I’m assuming you’re Latina, they didn’t mention your weight loss cause they’re a bunch of haters. At least that’s how it goes for gatherings at my Abuelita’s. Congrats. I’m 14 lbs down. Hope to lose another 30. Thanks for the motivation.
Girl you are gorgeous!!! Wow. Your face is perfect.
You look great!
Don’t let other people hate on your accomplishments. They just wish to be in your shoes.
Congratulations on your weight loss darlin! You look beautiful 😊😉
Weight is a sensitive subject to just bring up, unless the other person brings it up first. You can DEF tell a difference tho, you look great!!!
WOW!!! Beautiful!!! Well done !!!
I have chronic illness and lost a significant amount of weight from fatigue and loss of appetite. When people compliment my weight loss I always make sure to make it extremely awkward for them. "You look great!" "I feel awful." "Did you lose weight?" "No, I developed a chronic illness." Lack of commenting is just people being sensitive. If you bring it up in a positive way, it will give others to courage to compliment your efforts. But when it doubt, don't comment on people's bodies, y'know? edit: for the record, you look fantastic and happy! I'd be shocked if people didn't notice! I think they're just being polite.
Wow, well done! I only had a few people asking if I was "okay" after 210 > 165... yes, I felt great! But people will say dumb stuff, not on purpose.
This it really hits home. Or they'll make a comment and then you go you do realize who you're talking to and they'll then one up and say well you get it and then you pull out your phone and you show the pictures of what you look like a few years ago and it's like do you want to restate what you just said to me. And it's like they're getting offended that you're not agreeing with the way they say things and it's like hey no you can't be the judge you can't be saying this. It's like they lose their filter so some people will just not speak sometimes it's really weird. And yes the dumb comments that you hear just makes you do like a triple take you look at them going Wait what.
Wow. Either jealous or just felt awkward saying you looked bloated and heavier before. Completely different.
weight is always a touch subject. Great job though and face gains galore.
Fantastic! Thanks for sharing
What a difference. You look gorgeous! Congratulations with the efforts you made!
You look Hispanic, and I feel like most Hispanic people (especially moms/dads/aunts/uncles/grandparents) are pretty critical of the younger generation in their family. Not typically supportive and encouraging, rather challenging and dismissive. They don’t tend to recognize and cheer on accomplishments as often as white and black people’s families. Maybe ignoring your weight loss could be attributed to that. Also, congratulations on the transformation! Huge face gains 👊🏼
You're correct. I'm mexican. Unfortunately, I am not close with any of my family. Always felt like the black sheep most of my life.
You’re gorgeous girl. I see your hard work 💖
They just jelly, you go grl
Omg can your family be any more jealous? Amazing progress - this internet stranger is proud of you! And no one mentioned anything because they are jealous lolololol.
You look like a different person. Great work!
You look great
You're doing such an amazing job, it's so clear. Keep going to hit your goal, don't be discouraged. Be so proud of yourself.
You look incredible, great job, inspirational, I hope I get to were you are too
You look great! Keep moving!
You are STUNNING!
Can be a plethora of reasons. Jealousy (not likely in a group). They may also see you often, so have seen the progress in real-time (not likely) Or, they may just not want to say anything. Or none of the above. Truth is....it's obviously a superb transformation, so you'll have to make do with us saying it. Family aside... surely others have complimented you? I know when I hit the gym, once I see results (I'm genuinely not in great shape), the comments come. I frequently notice people checking out my arms, if the get a little more developed.... I really need to get back to it
You look fantastic! You should be proud :)
Sounds like you need to drop your family too! Jk. Keep up the good work! Proud of you!
I think you’ve _obviously_ lost weight, but I don’t know you and wouldn’t want to comment unless I knew you’d been working to that end. Keep up the great work & drop the worry!!
Lots of people dislike their weight loss being commented on so I think it's best to bring it up yourself. You look great and everyone noticed don't worry
how did you do it?
I first focused on self love and improving my mental health like meditating and finding hobbies I love like skincare and DIY stuff. And then I started eating keto which was surprisingly easy for me to transition despite having a history of binge eating. I walk 10-12k steps every day while using the StepBet app to motivate me. And I exercise a few days a week from various workouts on YouTube.
Maybe they didn't recognize you ! You look great, congratulations.
Keep going, you're doing great!Just continue focusing on your health goals.
You look great! I'm starting my weight loss journey now. I hope I look half as good as you do. Keep u0 the good work.
you are looking fantastic
Gorgeous
U look amazing!
I’m one of those people it’s really awkward to ask about weight. People who ask put me in an awkward situation where I have to lie or I’m sick of lying and I tell them I can’t keep anything down and I can only manage to eat a meal a day. Two if I’m lucky. I promise these people just realize talking about weight loss can potentially be very awkward and don’t want to potentially make you uncomfortable. Find a way to bring up your weight loss in conversation with them and I’m sure you’ll get the validation you want and deserve.
I’m sorry no one told you how awesome you’ve done! My guess is they felt it wasn’t their place to comment on their body, but I PROMISE people noticed. You look beautiful!
Looks like wonderful progress and keep up with your health goals. Thanks for the inspo 🙌🏽
Could it be that they simply didn’t recognize you? That they taught your boyfriend has brought his new girlfriend along?
ITS HILARIOUS, I also had a transformation like you (amazing work btw, you look gorgeous) and NO ONE WOULD MENTION IT. It drove me wild. Like I worked so hard MF-ers, just say I look cuter 😭
Wow, beautiful and inspiring.
You look great- and at least 5 years younger!
Great work. Look good currently..work hard to stay fit and not for the sole purpose of losing weight.
You have beautiful cheeks!!
You go girl~
You look great! Keep up the good work🌸🌼
We have the same, exact stats! Congrats to us! Very few people have said anything to me but I know they can see it. I think they are being polite and are being sensitive (even if I want them to say something--haha). You look beautiful, before and now, and I can see a big difference!
Same height, start weight and goal weight is 145 :) thanks for the inspiration!!
I never ever make a comment on someone’s weight unless they bring up that they’re explicitly trying to lose. Medications, mental health, illness, etc. can all cause fluctuations in weight. It can be very hurtful to be complimented on weight loss when it’s unintentional.
Those same people would notice 5 pounds gained though and would point it out in a heartbeat don’t worry about them focus on your own health and journey you look great
I love each and every comment and DM from everyone! I had a busy day with sis in law flying in right when I posted this so I'm sorry I'm lagging in replying to everyone. It truly brings a tear to my eye how incredibly nice and supportive everyone is. I was utterly terrified of posting but glad I did. Sis in law was actually the person that finally said something!
You look amazing, great work. It definitely shows!!!
Families can really suck sometimes. You look great! Losing 40 lbs. is not easy (trust me, I know), you should be SO proud of yourself 😊
You look great it’s definitely noticeable
Whoa. That's a drastic change keep it up.
Family can be the worst sometimes believe it or not sometimes they’re the most jealous of your doing well. you look absolutely amazingly wonderful! I’m very proud of you! Just know by them not saying something speaks volumes on how incredibly well you’re doing!
Better to say nothing than what a cousin by marriage shouted to me once in a busy Nordstrom. “WOW, YOU USED TO BE AS BIG AS A HOUSE!” PS: Congrats on your hard work. You look beautiful. 👏
I complimented someone’s weight loss once and it turned out she was bulimic !
Awesome, keep it up!
You look amazing and thats all that counts. You can be so proud of yourself! Keep up the great work!
You cute 🙄
A couple of days ago someone complained that she did get comments on her weight loss. So basically if you comment you’re fucked, if you don’t comment you’re also fucked. Can’t win either way…
I will never bring up someone’s weight loss unless they indicate that it was intentional. I know too many people who lost weight and “looked great!” due to stress or trauma in their lives, or medical issues. You look amazing and I’m sure people noticed but didn’t want to make an awkward comment.
I think they were being polite. I much would definitely prefer this. I hate my weight being the focus.
Huge difference! You got this!
You are lovely .
Please don’t take it personal. Especially if you come from a loving, supportive family. They might not say anything, for fear of your feelings being hurt. However, I also understand being hurt. You’ve made great progress, and it’s normal to want support! You DO look amazing, you are a beautiful lady 🤩
I never point out peoples’ weight loss because there’s always a chance the weight loss is due to illness or stress or some other difficult life circumstance. People were probably just being cautious. There is a big difference though, and you look great!
girl look at u !!! u were pretty but ur deffo more prettier now !! even us nose looks slimmer now and the eyes look even bigger.. big progress 🤯🤯
Trust me they noticed. Might just feel weird saying it as it kind of implies that you were “fat” before. Amazing job!!
The difference is so stark it’s hard to believe no one noticed. Looking really good.
Hi OP! I’ve lost 145 lbs and find that people are very intentional about the way they either do or do not bring up the weight loss. Lots of people due to age or culture don’t think it’s acceptable to talk about. I see both sides, it’s nice to be encouraged for our hard work but I never want to believe I hear you that you are better because you weigh less now. It’s complicated but keep up the good work!
I've had a few people say that they can see it and they don't want to say anything and then I've had people make comments and their backwards comments when you say the little steps you've done and under their breath they'll say it must be nice. Sometimes the people we think will support us the most or the ones that actually will hold us back. Sometimes just sometimes when people see somebody else achieving something that they want to but aren't willing to put in the time you can see the results of how they treat people. If nobody has said it I want to say that I'm extremely proud of you you've done amazing job and all that matters is how you feel about yourself in the end.
Awesomeness
I don't say it because I worry I may come across as offensive but I usually say something like "wow you look amazing" but usually I try to avoid weight reference.
I commented on the weight loss of my landlord saying how good he looked; it turned out he had cancer and died within a few months. Needless to say, I don’t make any comments unless the person brings up their weight loss themselves.
idk if ur hispanic, but as a hispanic person myself, people be jealous girl, that's why they didn't bring it up. You look so different, be proud!! <3
You look fantastic! And like other commenters have said, people may just not speak their thoughts out loud. I've often thought that someone looks like they've lost weight, but feel that it would be awkward to comment as it implies that they had weight to lose in the first place, or that their weight is something I'm paying attention to. Or maybe I'm wrong or misremembering, they were actually just bloated last time but now I've put into their head that they should be on some kind of weight loss journey. So generally I just don't say anything, unless it's SUPER obvious. But even then, you never know if the reason for losing it was due to an illness, mental health issues or whatnot, so it's still daunting. What I'm teaching myself here is that I should just tell people when they look great without pinning it to their weight and leave it at that.
Excellent work on losing weight! Congratulations!
Fuckin killin it dude well done
Gotta do it for you, darlin :)
You look good I wouldn’t drop another 20lb pounds, honestly I would suggest you stay at the weight you’re at. But that’s just my opinion, I understand as individuals we are never content with our weight or the way we look but I’m sure you’re everyone noticed. But like other have said people get jealous or just want to stay messing, don’t even bother with them.
Yowza! Good work
I don’t say anything to people anymore because I never know what they’re going through- if the weight loss is good or bad!
You look beautiful in both pictures, but you look like a completely different person
Two things - did you dress well or did you dress "loose"? sometimes women lose weight and dress a bit off other than that I bet it is jealousy!! I saw a girl that was really heavy six months ago and I was really impressed and asked her about it and she was happy to talk about it. most of the time when we lose weight we're happy when people notice. Keep going!! You're probably doing much better than them could be part of the problem, they don't feel good about themselves. Even if you didn't lose 20 more pounds you look beautiful and I bet are so much healthier overall.
I don't dress loose in general if anything I hide my shame. I've been known to wear long sleeves in hot weather but it was more of a coping mechanism than anything. I do wear mostly black. Part of the uncomfortability is that I definitely don't share the same religious views as them and they probably picked up on that quickly
Oh yeah, mostly black and long sleeves even in the summer!
TMI but I do have self harm scars from a long time ago so I try to have it out of sight. I can't tell ya how many people give me shit for looking like a weirdo for long sleeves in 95+ temps.
It's become taboo to comment on someone's weight. People don't always know whether it was intentional or due to physical or mental illness. You look noticeably different. People definitely noticed.
Girl I can only see your face here and the change is insane - good on you! You’ve totally inspired me! You are looking (and I bet feeling) fantastic - keep up the good work 😊
Amazing work, Gorgeous to “more” gorgeous must be fun!!! ❤️
Some people don’t like their weight mentioned, even when they’ve purposefully lost some. Everyone is different and they were being polite. Be thankful that you don’t have a family who calls you “fat”, “skinny”, or contributes to any disorders you may have. Always do something as important as a weight loss journey for yourself and never for validation from anyone. Your progress is for you.
This just happened to me this past weekend (4 days ago) I went from 298 to 254 after 7 injections. From a size 22-24, 3-4X to a size 14/Large and nobody noticed. I was so discouraged. It's weird bc I still look the same when I see myself in the mirror but the scale and my clothes say other wise. I never really took pictures before, I'm so glad you had pics to show your progress! Keep up the good work, we're in this together and in the end, it will be worth it to ourselves even if nobody else says a word. This achievement is for our own personal journey! Best of luck!
I'm so sorry no one said anything. Congratulations on your weight loss!!! Without a doubt, you're a much healthier person than before and the clothes are absolutely a marvelous indicator of that! I still struggle with the mirror thing too but we are our own worst critics as the saying goes. If you haven't taken a picture already definitely do it now. You're on the up and up! Body measurements are a great indicator too, I highly encourage that. I measure monthly. All these comments are giving me great insight on why people don't bring it up. I'm not always great at gauging social cues on what's the right thing to say or not but it's starting to knock some sense into me.
Thank you!! I would never take pics, but I will because your words make sense. I'm the type to immediately be like, "oh you look great" or "whatever you're doing, keep it up". I always thought that was encouraging but now I realize, what if they lost weight due to an illness- so is it really great?? That's the ONLY reason I hesitate but if it's close family/friends, I typically will always acknowledge them if I see the change ❤
How could they not notice! Your face is so much thinner , keep up the good work and don’t let anybody ever get you down
Everyone Definitely can see it but just remember at the end of the day it’s to be healthier and feel healthier
First off, buy your family glasses. It is night and day. Your hard work has paid off. As long as you notice and benefit, don't let their lack of attention bring you down. You look great! One thing I've been doing is going to the store and counting up boxes of butter. In your case 40 boxes. That's all the weight you've lost. I bet you'll be surprised, and it filters out dysmorphia.
I cried when my own mother who caused most of my body dysphoria and early eating disorders by calling me chunky in my teens didn’t comment when I lost 40 lbs. I confronted her about it and she said she learned it could be unwanted remarks. Couldn’t believe she finally shut her mouth the one time I wanted her to notice my weight lol. But great job btw!!!
That's absolutely horrid I'm utterly sorry she treated you awful. You deserve so much better! What kind of mother doesn't compliment their own child's 40 pound loss?! I'm incredibly proud of your weight loss I know it sure as fuck wasn't easy!
I am starting to think this is the norm. My close friends and family don’t seem to notice or cheer me on in the least. A few co-workers knew I was working at losing weight and are encouraging and have noticed changes but even upon sending progress pics to my mom after getting to 39lbs lost,not even a comment—she just left me on read since last night. You are doing awesome—and this is a great place for encouraging words. I know it can be disappointing when those we love don’t cheer us on so,cheer yourself on because you deserve it and you rock!
I am starting to think this is the norm. My close friends and family don’t seem to notice or cheer me on in the least. A few co-workers knew I was working at losing weight and are encouraging and have noticed changes but even upon sending progress pics to my mom after getting to 39lbs lost,not even a comment—she just left me on read since last night. You are doing awesome—and this is a great place for encouraging words. I know it can be disappointing when those we love don’t cheer us on so,cheer yourself on because you deserve it and you rock!
Gorgeous face gains queen!