Sometimes you have to try a few things to discover it. You're a human, not a robot. Knowing exactly what your true calling is is a difficult thing. Maybe go travelling, see the world, get some life experience and whilst your doing that, think about what you'd like to do.
For me, it became pretty obvious what my path was when it seemed impossible to stop thinking about, and it was physically uncomfortable trying to convince myself to do other things.
yea man, I started on my own doing electronic music and hip hop, but Im soon going to be attending a music school to study film scoring and composition
OH, that is amazing!! You'll get to work on some cool student films I bet. I've been interested in doing music videos, which I think I will be doing at some point with my own work, but that will require others help, and I am currently friendless and have to figure out how to meet people who are also creative types, because I am not having luck with friends who aren't themselves creative, or even just working on anything they're passionate about.
Idk where you make friends???
i mean I just meet loads of creatives online through social media and discord, you just need to follow the right pages and join the right servers, whenever you see a creative whose work you like, just reach out to them and it starts there
Your like is a living document. Any choice you make today can be changed. Do what you think is best right now and later, if it's not working, adapt. Make new choices.
Very true. Life hit hard for me and my family as I lost my dad last year suddenly. He was the one that kept us afloat and as the eldest I feel a strong need to be the one the bring us back up again thus the question. Itās just I have alot of fear in not getting to that point for me and the family when I feel so lost with my future.
Youāre not going to know. So the second best thing is āFail fastā. Try something and see what you like and donāt like about it. If itās not something you can see yourself doing permanently then move on. Most people find their ultimate job through a series of random events that all come down to one thing: the people you know. Make connections. This is the real benefit of going to college.
āFail Fastā is one of the best things Iāve heard in a long time so I am very thankful of you sharing that. I never thought of experimenting with my interests or anything in general like that
I changed my path many times and didnāt settle on a career until about 26. My goals are still developing and changing. Donāt put too much pressure on yourself and try different things to figure out what you like.
Something I tried is focusing on what fulfills me in life and trying to make career out of that. My passion is helping people. So I work in the beauty industry making people feel good, listening, and guiding. Then I decided I wanted to be more holistic and am working on nutrition/personal training courses. I may change my mine 5x over and go on a whole new path. Thatās part of the fun of life
I have been telling myself that it is okay to experiment and figure out what I actually do genuinely like but I guess I feel like I have too much to lose if I fail.
I understand the fear of failure. It can be debilitating! I had to change my mindset about failure.
For one, if I try something and Iām not good at it/dont like it I can either keep trying and get better/grow to like it or be fine with the fact that itās not for me. Itās not necessarily failure. āYou only fail if you give up tryingā is a cliche quote, but very true!!! It sounds like youāre pretty hard on yourself. Life is supposed to be fun and if you take the pressure of succeeding at everything off of yourself, you can begin to enjoy even the failures. The fails turn into valuable lessons and a story to tell.
I also had to find out the reason I was so afraid of āfailureā. For me, it came down to the fact that I believed if I failed, that means I wasnāt enough. That was huge to figure out. Now, I donāt get my value through what I can produce and all that stuff. I get my value through self love/acceptance, friends, family, good actions, etc. so even when I āfailā it doesnāt destroy me
Never thought of failure that way. I feel like the fear comes from me wanting to do so much and soon that I cannot bear the fact that my family and loved ones cannot benefit from what I worked hard for. But your perspective changed how I saw it and itās making me think about my current situation on whether to pursue med or to pursue the healthcare sector. I used to like it during onsite classes but I guess the difficulty made me think otherwise.
I absolutely believe that you need to do whatever makes you happy. For me it was to be self-employed. At 22 I brainstormed (with the help of cannabis) and came up with several business ideas. Pursued one and stuck with it. Took a weekend job while I got it going. Three decades later I'm still running my own business with a few employees and still happy.
It's not about the money, it's about what makes you happy.
Life is short.
Do anything that you like or feeling a a calling towards. There is nothing callled right or best decision. Just make sure you have a basic education to fall upon if new adventures or ventures dont go as planned. Take new steps, don't hold back when your heart calls for it.
Nope. and I'm 34, I bartend and probably make way more money than I ever should have considering I never could find a degree I actually enjoyed. Is bartending my calling? Doubt it, am I good at it? Yes.
āCan you me calling? Calling out your nameāā¦. What are you passionate about? Sometimes truly enjoyable hobbies donāt translate to a career necessarily it can lose its appeal, but what do u find purpose in? Do u like to help people? Help animals? Do you work well under high pressure environments? Do you love detail or photography? What were your favorite subjects?- all of these questions being written down and answered can give you a little insight into what a good career looks like to you!!
Iām so happy that people at this age have Reddit and online communities to ask such questions. I was exactly at your point a decade ago when I was your age. I wish I had the right guidance.
One thing super important is donāt stop learning. Whether skills or just reading books or learning a new language. It will give you the flexibility to explore more options in future
Secondly donāt commit to something that you canāt leave after 3-4 years (if you decide to). Like e.g I joined the Airforce to become a pilot rather than going for medical school. It changed everything about my life.
So donāt jump into something that you canāt leave at will. Also donāt be afraid of failures. Take some lessons from each experience and move on. Donāt get stuck.
This might not answer your question but I hope this helps. Best of luck
It makes me feel good actually asking this question here after reading your comment. I don't really ask questions like this even to people face-to-face but I really want to do better. I am currently in the thought process of getting into medicine after graduating a pre-med course but I am starting to think otherwise. I just fear the "I'm too far in, I cannot go back now" thought especially if I do enter into med.
It all depends on you. If you are someone who has a lot of empathy and helping people in distress gives you a sense of accomplishment, I would definitely recommend diving into medicine. Otherwise itās a long and tiring path. However you can change your specialties according to your taste. Again it all boils down to your own preference and viable options atm
Honestly I think itās a little bit different for everybody. But from my perspective:
My calling is what I work to improve at without even thinking about it. I think about working on it even when Iām āoffā of working hours. I get āsparksā of creativity/ingenuity related to it. People tell me Iām great at it even when Iām not trying that hard.
Take baby steps. Aim high but be realistic, actually set shorter goals first so you won't feel overwhelmed. Search for "ikigai" tho personally my life rn is more on doing things i am paid for and what the world needs.
If you want a structured way, search "smart" goals, it's called "smarter" goals now, and you'll encounter some examples. Just, don't dive in too much motivational gurus and life coaches. I mean, I have nothing against them, just that, comparison is the thief of joy.
The only way when you're 22 to really ruin your future is to get killed or thrown in prison for a long time.
To find your calling, try out every little interest that arises. Get bored and quit a million things.
Whatever you keep going back to probably has something to do with your calling
Consider your needs and go from there e.g. I have siblings, therefore I should choose a job with financial security in the future that I can attain. It can be hard to predict the future, so I'd say prioritise making wise decisions, happiness can come from doing what you love but you also have to consider your survival :)
Unfortunately theres never a guarantee, no matter how perfect you execute your plans.
Best tip i can give you: Do your best but expect nothing ( but the worst ).
Donāt expect to find fulfillment at work. Work will always be something that other people would rather not pay to get done. They are always balancing resource allocation for multiple things and will rather not give you the time, money, or other resources to do your work properly. Also keep in mind that doing something for work may kill your passion for it.
Find something that is important enough to get paid to do. Something that is difficult to get good at, but still interesting and tolerable toil to you.
Pick the cheapest path is my advice in case you wanna change it. I had no idea what my calling was also poor so I just started working in collections departments, worked my way up the finance department to project management. My work is interesting, I build multi million dollar budgets for research. But my passion is my life, family and friends. No student loans, and my job is something I can do well for awhile, no psychical labor. What are you passionate about? Sometimes our careers don't have to be our passion, but that doesn't mean you won't get to live them.
i am 24 and have the same question as you. how do i figure out what my calling is? i worked in finance for a couple of years absolutely hated it. i quit my job a few months ago and have been trying to figure out what next? most peopleās advice is just to try different things and figure it out. but what different things? i mean, i have a degree in finance, but not many other skills. how do i figure what i should invest my time in? i feel like im also just really scared at not being good at something and i overthink things and get stuck in a state of analysis paralysis. iām unable to make decisions and just get overwhelmed. sorry not an answer but another question lol
Not all people have a ācalling.ā
Sometimes, you have to be pragmatic about things.
Something a lot of people donāt think about is the type of work they do. For me personally, I like working with my hands. Being chained to a desk in AC feels like slavery to me.
Iād rather be outside suffering doing almost anything other then that.
Try and think about stuff you like doing, from a very practical perspective. What interests do you have outside of work or trying to make money?
In the end and in reality, most jobs pretty much suck. But, it can be much more doable when youāre aligned with how you like working and something that can appeal to you on some level.!
thatās fair, iāve actually been thinking along similar lines. iām also confused about what place i want work to have in my life. should it be a source of joy, contentment and satisfaction? or should it just be a job that provides me with the means and resources to gain that fulfilment outside of work?
Iāve had a lot of jobs, corporate jobs, small group kind of jobs etc.
The vast majority of jobs are are not going to be a source of joy, contentment and satisfaction.
The only thing I would consider that would hit that metric would be maybe small groups of like minded people who are doing work you believe in.
Please keep in mind though, there is no utopia. There is no perfect job. Economies and companies are not designed to make us happy, theyāre simply designed to make money by selling services or goods to people who are willing to buy them.
Obviously, there is a hierarchy of meaning here. In the end though, there is always some level of BS involved in most occupations.
you can't just know things. you have to try things, and from trying things you learn about what you like and don't like, plus what really matters to you and what doesn't.
think of it this way: go somewhere where you will find other people like you who agree with you on what's really important about life and the world, meaning do you want to be surrounded by people who want to make as much money as possible, or do you want to be surrounded by people who love what they're doing because they think it's super important work and they'd make less money just to be able to do it, or do you want to be surrounded by people who just show up, do the work, go home, and don't really give it much else thought
think of the kind of person you are and think of other people like you and where they would be and what they would be doing. so much of career advice is focused on just the individual where in so many great things are achieved by people working happily together.
but in terms of focusing just on you the individual, think of the things that are really important to you out in the world. technological innovation? big business? healthcare? education? rule of law? scientific advancement? things getting to where they need to be when they need to get there?
really look out there into the world and find people, places, and things that make you feel something inside. you're trying to look for a spark, a match between inside and outside; you want the voice inside you to say, "yeah this is worth it." think about it: you're going to be telling everyone you meet what you do and why you do it, so you should choose something you care about or at the very least makes sense for you, i.e. you want to be able to say "this is who I am, this is what I think is important, and this is how I help take care of that important thing."
if you don't have the answers for these questions, go find them.
I tried listing down all hobbies and skills in the venn diagram called Ikigai (basically a blank format of that) and then i tried combining 2 hobbies or 3 into 1 job/task/hobby per category. When i tried to consummate everything, i actually found out what i wanted to do, what im probably gonna be good at, and what the world needs and what i can be paid for at the same time.
I don't know if everyone has a calling, or that you need to have one to have a satisfying life. I don't think I have found mine yet. Around your age I had a realization that I didn't want my job to define me, and that the most important priority in my life would be the people close to me. I must say though that I am very lucky that I stumbled upon a career that I am very suited for, pays well and leaves me with plenty of free time, so I am speaking from a position of privilege. Is my career my calling? No, not really.
Another concept I found helpful was ikigai. You can google that, but basically if you do a list of all activities that 1. you are good at, 2. you enjoy, 3. the world is willing to pay you for and 4. the world needs, there should be some overlaps, and whatever is in the center of that Venn diagram is your ikigai, or calling.
Don't fall into the trap of ignoring either of the two aspects you mentioned - sustaining yourself and your family, and enjoying it. It is too easy to get stuck in a job you hate just because it pays the bills and you haven't had a better idea, but I also have little sympathy for people who went with their passion knowing full well that they will struggle for the rest of their lives.
Also, chill. You're very young. You can't even imagine the turns your life will take from now until you are 30. You have plenty of time to figure this out. Just go with something that seems like a good idea and you can always pivot later.
One thing I would tell my younger self: do the hard things now. I shied away from studying anything STEM related because I wasn't excelling at sciences and I thought I would find it difficult. I studied business and then went into applied linguistics. Now I feel like I would have so much more opportunities if my first degree had been something like engineering - even if I wouldn't want to work as an engineer. I feel like I'm too old and done with the formal education system to get that degree now. I definitely could, but I feel like that ship has sailed. It is so much easier to be in your 30s if you laid solid foundations in your 20s.
I just feel like time is going by so fast now for some reason. I just want to provide for my family as quickly as I can because we are done bad right now after the sudden loss of my dad. As the eldest, I feel the need to get us back up but I can't help but feel the pressure. What you said about getting into a job that you hate is very true. I just graduated from a pre-med course and I can't help but think about moving forward to medicine even though I feel like I won't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. It is a big decision because of the commitment. But again, I am lost and have no idea what to do about it.
That is a lot of extra info. I'm sorry about your dad! I completely understand that you feel pressured to grow up and provide for your family right now. Are you the sole breadwinner? Do you need a full time job or can you work part time while you study something?
I'm not terribly familiar with how medical training works, is there a job you can do with your current qualification while you figure out if you want to progress? Is there anything else that interests you, outside medicine?
Iām currently not working but I do want to be the breadwinner despite how much it will weigh because i really want to provide for my family. Medicine has always been my automatic answer when asked the question since I was little and now that I graduated from a pre-med course and I would say i kind of got a look into how my life would be if I was a student, and idk, I feel like I want to and I donāt. I canāt decide especially because how much commitment it would be financially, socially, and mentally.
Outside of the healthcare sector, I love creating and thought of being my own boss/ leader in business. But I honestly am so scared because of how shaky that path would be and as eldest I want to provide already.
There are a very lucky few who actually manage to find their passion, get a job in that area, and keep that passion.
Most of the time, actually working on a passion will destroy the passion and make you hate the job. For example, I remember being a voracious reader in elementary school until I started having to write book reports - then I hated reading because reading had stopped being fun and started being work. A lot of us are born enjoying exercise, then we learn to hate it in PE. We might love interacting with people until we get our first crappy service job.
A lot of times, the trick is to find something you can tolerate. You don't love it, but you can do it for 40-60 hours a week without going insane - and then you build a comfortable life around that.
Otherwise, you can find a mission. A lot of mission-driven work is unstable, has low pay, etc. - but you care about it enough to keep at it. It's not really happiness that you experience from this, since it's something you're willing to suffer for, but it can be a reason for living.
As a human I am pretty much disconnected from my environment or even my life. Nothing impresses meno matter how georgous or astonishing it would seem to a normal person. But there was one thing that got me worked up everytime and that's injustice. I hate unjust situations, unjust people and people who think they can do vile things and stand above everything else. So I basically chose to study law so that I can fight against such things.
I'm just 24, but what I know for sure is: The mind will always regret the things that didn't happen, so life your life based on your mind, not others :)
You have to try a few things. Some thing you would REALLY like but you notice that your not really good at it. And thatās completely fine that can be a hobby but something that you feel naturally like some people like to cook, dance, shop, be into fashion. Stuff you liked already just on a greater scale.
I think you mean Ikigai? I donāt know much about it yet but I have been hearing it from time to time. So I think itās a sign for me to actually look into it
It will depend a lot on who you are now and what you think life is about You could do one of the Psychology personality type tests that give some idea of what might suit you. At that age I had been a farm labourer ,apprentice pattern maker and at 19 went into nursing the decision was influenced by my faith background . What my mainly female friends where doing and an uncle in the RAMC . It is a path that leads to great job satisfaction and you can progress to Education or Management or any number of well paid positions in various work areas that require a nursing background . So who are you ? Do you want to be rich ? Tech and Finance . Just over broke any job will do .Nature and outdoors and so on . you have about 120,000 different jobs to choose from so narrow it down to things you would like . Also people than ever self employed. Good luck and kind thoughts.
That's what I am trying to figure out right now. Just graduated from a healthcare field but I don't know if it's the difficulty that is giving me second thoughts or I just genuinely have no interest. It is a big decision for me especially if I move over to medicine which was my original thought before enrolling into undergrad, it would give me and my family a huge loss and I would say a big waste of time
Interesting at later stage I did consider medicine but I had commitments and some doubts about the extra 5 to 10 years of study . I donāt regret not trying life is to short to master more. Than a few things.
Sometimes you have to try a few things to discover it. You're a human, not a robot. Knowing exactly what your true calling is is a difficult thing. Maybe go travelling, see the world, get some life experience and whilst your doing that, think about what you'd like to do.
For me, it became pretty obvious what my path was when it seemed impossible to stop thinking about, and it was physically uncomfortable trying to convince myself to do other things.
I wish and hope for that feeling every day. Still just in limbo it feels like
It took me quite a while, I am just back in school at 34
Wow, that's really inspiring! Good luck with your endeavors!
Thank you š
Psychology for me was an obsession. It was all I thought about and still think about!
What was it?
Writing/research and music
lets go my calling is music too
Heck yea, do you have any plans you're working on?
yea man, I started on my own doing electronic music and hip hop, but Im soon going to be attending a music school to study film scoring and composition
OH, that is amazing!! You'll get to work on some cool student films I bet. I've been interested in doing music videos, which I think I will be doing at some point with my own work, but that will require others help, and I am currently friendless and have to figure out how to meet people who are also creative types, because I am not having luck with friends who aren't themselves creative, or even just working on anything they're passionate about. Idk where you make friends???
i mean I just meet loads of creatives online through social media and discord, you just need to follow the right pages and join the right servers, whenever you see a creative whose work you like, just reach out to them and it starts there
Your like is a living document. Any choice you make today can be changed. Do what you think is best right now and later, if it's not working, adapt. Make new choices.
Unfortunately, society puts pressure on young adults to make life altering decisions at a time where most are not mature enough to do so.
yup, and it expects you to take out loans that are going to absolutely cripple you later if you didn't pick the right path.
Very true. Life hit hard for me and my family as I lost my dad last year suddenly. He was the one that kept us afloat and as the eldest I feel a strong need to be the one the bring us back up again thus the question. Itās just I have alot of fear in not getting to that point for me and the family when I feel so lost with my future.
Youāre not going to know. So the second best thing is āFail fastā. Try something and see what you like and donāt like about it. If itās not something you can see yourself doing permanently then move on. Most people find their ultimate job through a series of random events that all come down to one thing: the people you know. Make connections. This is the real benefit of going to college.
āFail Fastā is one of the best things Iāve heard in a long time so I am very thankful of you sharing that. I never thought of experimenting with my interests or anything in general like that
I changed my path many times and didnāt settle on a career until about 26. My goals are still developing and changing. Donāt put too much pressure on yourself and try different things to figure out what you like. Something I tried is focusing on what fulfills me in life and trying to make career out of that. My passion is helping people. So I work in the beauty industry making people feel good, listening, and guiding. Then I decided I wanted to be more holistic and am working on nutrition/personal training courses. I may change my mine 5x over and go on a whole new path. Thatās part of the fun of life
I have been telling myself that it is okay to experiment and figure out what I actually do genuinely like but I guess I feel like I have too much to lose if I fail.
I understand the fear of failure. It can be debilitating! I had to change my mindset about failure. For one, if I try something and Iām not good at it/dont like it I can either keep trying and get better/grow to like it or be fine with the fact that itās not for me. Itās not necessarily failure. āYou only fail if you give up tryingā is a cliche quote, but very true!!! It sounds like youāre pretty hard on yourself. Life is supposed to be fun and if you take the pressure of succeeding at everything off of yourself, you can begin to enjoy even the failures. The fails turn into valuable lessons and a story to tell. I also had to find out the reason I was so afraid of āfailureā. For me, it came down to the fact that I believed if I failed, that means I wasnāt enough. That was huge to figure out. Now, I donāt get my value through what I can produce and all that stuff. I get my value through self love/acceptance, friends, family, good actions, etc. so even when I āfailā it doesnāt destroy me
Never thought of failure that way. I feel like the fear comes from me wanting to do so much and soon that I cannot bear the fact that my family and loved ones cannot benefit from what I worked hard for. But your perspective changed how I saw it and itās making me think about my current situation on whether to pursue med or to pursue the healthcare sector. I used to like it during onsite classes but I guess the difficulty made me think otherwise.
So happy for your relief and change in perspective. If you ever need any support just message me
Aw thank you so much!
I absolutely believe that you need to do whatever makes you happy. For me it was to be self-employed. At 22 I brainstormed (with the help of cannabis) and came up with several business ideas. Pursued one and stuck with it. Took a weekend job while I got it going. Three decades later I'm still running my own business with a few employees and still happy. It's not about the money, it's about what makes you happy. Life is short.
Do anything that you like or feeling a a calling towards. There is nothing callled right or best decision. Just make sure you have a basic education to fall upon if new adventures or ventures dont go as planned. Take new steps, don't hold back when your heart calls for it.
Nope. and I'm 34, I bartend and probably make way more money than I ever should have considering I never could find a degree I actually enjoyed. Is bartending my calling? Doubt it, am I good at it? Yes.
āCan you me calling? Calling out your nameāā¦. What are you passionate about? Sometimes truly enjoyable hobbies donāt translate to a career necessarily it can lose its appeal, but what do u find purpose in? Do u like to help people? Help animals? Do you work well under high pressure environments? Do you love detail or photography? What were your favorite subjects?- all of these questions being written down and answered can give you a little insight into what a good career looks like to you!!
Iām so happy that people at this age have Reddit and online communities to ask such questions. I was exactly at your point a decade ago when I was your age. I wish I had the right guidance. One thing super important is donāt stop learning. Whether skills or just reading books or learning a new language. It will give you the flexibility to explore more options in future Secondly donāt commit to something that you canāt leave after 3-4 years (if you decide to). Like e.g I joined the Airforce to become a pilot rather than going for medical school. It changed everything about my life. So donāt jump into something that you canāt leave at will. Also donāt be afraid of failures. Take some lessons from each experience and move on. Donāt get stuck. This might not answer your question but I hope this helps. Best of luck
It makes me feel good actually asking this question here after reading your comment. I don't really ask questions like this even to people face-to-face but I really want to do better. I am currently in the thought process of getting into medicine after graduating a pre-med course but I am starting to think otherwise. I just fear the "I'm too far in, I cannot go back now" thought especially if I do enter into med.
It all depends on you. If you are someone who has a lot of empathy and helping people in distress gives you a sense of accomplishment, I would definitely recommend diving into medicine. Otherwise itās a long and tiring path. However you can change your specialties according to your taste. Again it all boils down to your own preference and viable options atm
Honestly I think itās a little bit different for everybody. But from my perspective: My calling is what I work to improve at without even thinking about it. I think about working on it even when Iām āoffā of working hours. I get āsparksā of creativity/ingenuity related to it. People tell me Iām great at it even when Iām not trying that hard.
Take baby steps. Aim high but be realistic, actually set shorter goals first so you won't feel overwhelmed. Search for "ikigai" tho personally my life rn is more on doing things i am paid for and what the world needs. If you want a structured way, search "smart" goals, it's called "smarter" goals now, and you'll encounter some examples. Just, don't dive in too much motivational gurus and life coaches. I mean, I have nothing against them, just that, comparison is the thief of joy.
The only way when you're 22 to really ruin your future is to get killed or thrown in prison for a long time. To find your calling, try out every little interest that arises. Get bored and quit a million things. Whatever you keep going back to probably has something to do with your calling
Consider your needs and go from there e.g. I have siblings, therefore I should choose a job with financial security in the future that I can attain. It can be hard to predict the future, so I'd say prioritise making wise decisions, happiness can come from doing what you love but you also have to consider your survival :)
Unfortunately theres never a guarantee, no matter how perfect you execute your plans. Best tip i can give you: Do your best but expect nothing ( but the worst ).
Do your best to fulfill your intention.
Donāt expect to find fulfillment at work. Work will always be something that other people would rather not pay to get done. They are always balancing resource allocation for multiple things and will rather not give you the time, money, or other resources to do your work properly. Also keep in mind that doing something for work may kill your passion for it. Find something that is important enough to get paid to do. Something that is difficult to get good at, but still interesting and tolerable toil to you.
Pick the cheapest path is my advice in case you wanna change it. I had no idea what my calling was also poor so I just started working in collections departments, worked my way up the finance department to project management. My work is interesting, I build multi million dollar budgets for research. But my passion is my life, family and friends. No student loans, and my job is something I can do well for awhile, no psychical labor. What are you passionate about? Sometimes our careers don't have to be our passion, but that doesn't mean you won't get to live them.
i am 24 and have the same question as you. how do i figure out what my calling is? i worked in finance for a couple of years absolutely hated it. i quit my job a few months ago and have been trying to figure out what next? most peopleās advice is just to try different things and figure it out. but what different things? i mean, i have a degree in finance, but not many other skills. how do i figure what i should invest my time in? i feel like im also just really scared at not being good at something and i overthink things and get stuck in a state of analysis paralysis. iām unable to make decisions and just get overwhelmed. sorry not an answer but another question lol
Not all people have a ācalling.ā Sometimes, you have to be pragmatic about things. Something a lot of people donāt think about is the type of work they do. For me personally, I like working with my hands. Being chained to a desk in AC feels like slavery to me. Iād rather be outside suffering doing almost anything other then that. Try and think about stuff you like doing, from a very practical perspective. What interests do you have outside of work or trying to make money? In the end and in reality, most jobs pretty much suck. But, it can be much more doable when youāre aligned with how you like working and something that can appeal to you on some level.!
thatās fair, iāve actually been thinking along similar lines. iām also confused about what place i want work to have in my life. should it be a source of joy, contentment and satisfaction? or should it just be a job that provides me with the means and resources to gain that fulfilment outside of work?
Iāve had a lot of jobs, corporate jobs, small group kind of jobs etc. The vast majority of jobs are are not going to be a source of joy, contentment and satisfaction. The only thing I would consider that would hit that metric would be maybe small groups of like minded people who are doing work you believe in. Please keep in mind though, there is no utopia. There is no perfect job. Economies and companies are not designed to make us happy, theyāre simply designed to make money by selling services or goods to people who are willing to buy them. Obviously, there is a hierarchy of meaning here. In the end though, there is always some level of BS involved in most occupations.
you can't just know things. you have to try things, and from trying things you learn about what you like and don't like, plus what really matters to you and what doesn't. think of it this way: go somewhere where you will find other people like you who agree with you on what's really important about life and the world, meaning do you want to be surrounded by people who want to make as much money as possible, or do you want to be surrounded by people who love what they're doing because they think it's super important work and they'd make less money just to be able to do it, or do you want to be surrounded by people who just show up, do the work, go home, and don't really give it much else thought think of the kind of person you are and think of other people like you and where they would be and what they would be doing. so much of career advice is focused on just the individual where in so many great things are achieved by people working happily together. but in terms of focusing just on you the individual, think of the things that are really important to you out in the world. technological innovation? big business? healthcare? education? rule of law? scientific advancement? things getting to where they need to be when they need to get there? really look out there into the world and find people, places, and things that make you feel something inside. you're trying to look for a spark, a match between inside and outside; you want the voice inside you to say, "yeah this is worth it." think about it: you're going to be telling everyone you meet what you do and why you do it, so you should choose something you care about or at the very least makes sense for you, i.e. you want to be able to say "this is who I am, this is what I think is important, and this is how I help take care of that important thing." if you don't have the answers for these questions, go find them.
Keep asking the question. The answer will evolve over time šš»āØš«”
I tried listing down all hobbies and skills in the venn diagram called Ikigai (basically a blank format of that) and then i tried combining 2 hobbies or 3 into 1 job/task/hobby per category. When i tried to consummate everything, i actually found out what i wanted to do, what im probably gonna be good at, and what the world needs and what i can be paid for at the same time.
I don't know if everyone has a calling, or that you need to have one to have a satisfying life. I don't think I have found mine yet. Around your age I had a realization that I didn't want my job to define me, and that the most important priority in my life would be the people close to me. I must say though that I am very lucky that I stumbled upon a career that I am very suited for, pays well and leaves me with plenty of free time, so I am speaking from a position of privilege. Is my career my calling? No, not really. Another concept I found helpful was ikigai. You can google that, but basically if you do a list of all activities that 1. you are good at, 2. you enjoy, 3. the world is willing to pay you for and 4. the world needs, there should be some overlaps, and whatever is in the center of that Venn diagram is your ikigai, or calling. Don't fall into the trap of ignoring either of the two aspects you mentioned - sustaining yourself and your family, and enjoying it. It is too easy to get stuck in a job you hate just because it pays the bills and you haven't had a better idea, but I also have little sympathy for people who went with their passion knowing full well that they will struggle for the rest of their lives. Also, chill. You're very young. You can't even imagine the turns your life will take from now until you are 30. You have plenty of time to figure this out. Just go with something that seems like a good idea and you can always pivot later. One thing I would tell my younger self: do the hard things now. I shied away from studying anything STEM related because I wasn't excelling at sciences and I thought I would find it difficult. I studied business and then went into applied linguistics. Now I feel like I would have so much more opportunities if my first degree had been something like engineering - even if I wouldn't want to work as an engineer. I feel like I'm too old and done with the formal education system to get that degree now. I definitely could, but I feel like that ship has sailed. It is so much easier to be in your 30s if you laid solid foundations in your 20s.
I just feel like time is going by so fast now for some reason. I just want to provide for my family as quickly as I can because we are done bad right now after the sudden loss of my dad. As the eldest, I feel the need to get us back up but I can't help but feel the pressure. What you said about getting into a job that you hate is very true. I just graduated from a pre-med course and I can't help but think about moving forward to medicine even though I feel like I won't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. It is a big decision because of the commitment. But again, I am lost and have no idea what to do about it.
That is a lot of extra info. I'm sorry about your dad! I completely understand that you feel pressured to grow up and provide for your family right now. Are you the sole breadwinner? Do you need a full time job or can you work part time while you study something? I'm not terribly familiar with how medical training works, is there a job you can do with your current qualification while you figure out if you want to progress? Is there anything else that interests you, outside medicine?
Iām currently not working but I do want to be the breadwinner despite how much it will weigh because i really want to provide for my family. Medicine has always been my automatic answer when asked the question since I was little and now that I graduated from a pre-med course and I would say i kind of got a look into how my life would be if I was a student, and idk, I feel like I want to and I donāt. I canāt decide especially because how much commitment it would be financially, socially, and mentally. Outside of the healthcare sector, I love creating and thought of being my own boss/ leader in business. But I honestly am so scared because of how shaky that path would be and as eldest I want to provide already.
There are a very lucky few who actually manage to find their passion, get a job in that area, and keep that passion. Most of the time, actually working on a passion will destroy the passion and make you hate the job. For example, I remember being a voracious reader in elementary school until I started having to write book reports - then I hated reading because reading had stopped being fun and started being work. A lot of us are born enjoying exercise, then we learn to hate it in PE. We might love interacting with people until we get our first crappy service job. A lot of times, the trick is to find something you can tolerate. You don't love it, but you can do it for 40-60 hours a week without going insane - and then you build a comfortable life around that. Otherwise, you can find a mission. A lot of mission-driven work is unstable, has low pay, etc. - but you care about it enough to keep at it. It's not really happiness that you experience from this, since it's something you're willing to suffer for, but it can be a reason for living.
As a human I am pretty much disconnected from my environment or even my life. Nothing impresses meno matter how georgous or astonishing it would seem to a normal person. But there was one thing that got me worked up everytime and that's injustice. I hate unjust situations, unjust people and people who think they can do vile things and stand above everything else. So I basically chose to study law so that I can fight against such things.
Totally BS. I'm 36 amd just finding my calling. You work decent jobs and find things that interest you along the way . There is no timeline
I'm just 24, but what I know for sure is: The mind will always regret the things that didn't happen, so life your life based on your mind, not others :)
You have to try a few things. Some thing you would REALLY like but you notice that your not really good at it. And thatās completely fine that can be a hobby but something that you feel naturally like some people like to cook, dance, shop, be into fashion. Stuff you liked already just on a greater scale.
What's that Japanese word? Something that describes... What you love, what you're good at, what can make money, and what there is a need for.
I think you mean Ikigai? I donāt know much about it yet but I have been hearing it from time to time. So I think itās a sign for me to actually look into it
That sounds right to me
It will depend a lot on who you are now and what you think life is about You could do one of the Psychology personality type tests that give some idea of what might suit you. At that age I had been a farm labourer ,apprentice pattern maker and at 19 went into nursing the decision was influenced by my faith background . What my mainly female friends where doing and an uncle in the RAMC . It is a path that leads to great job satisfaction and you can progress to Education or Management or any number of well paid positions in various work areas that require a nursing background . So who are you ? Do you want to be rich ? Tech and Finance . Just over broke any job will do .Nature and outdoors and so on . you have about 120,000 different jobs to choose from so narrow it down to things you would like . Also people than ever self employed. Good luck and kind thoughts.
That's what I am trying to figure out right now. Just graduated from a healthcare field but I don't know if it's the difficulty that is giving me second thoughts or I just genuinely have no interest. It is a big decision for me especially if I move over to medicine which was my original thought before enrolling into undergrad, it would give me and my family a huge loss and I would say a big waste of time
Interesting at later stage I did consider medicine but I had commitments and some doubts about the extra 5 to 10 years of study . I donāt regret not trying life is to short to master more. Than a few things.
No need. I think.
Work is work.Ā Hobbies are hobbies.Ā Ā