as a follow up, the last Afghan Jew left in 2021 leaving no more Jews in the country
[https://www.theguardian.com/world/2021/sep/08/afghanistans-last-jew-leaves-country](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2021/sep/08/afghanistans-last-jew-leaves-country)
There's an *ackshuwally* to this story. Zebulon wasn't the last Jew in Afghanistan. He had a cousin emigrate to Isreal recently. She was able to recall everything from the Jewish community, with former residents validating her story. And she added one more thing: some of her children are still in Afghanistan. And they're still practicing in quiet.
It could be worse, they could have been with the Houthis in Yemen.
1. [The last Jew of Yemen is detained by the Houthis since 2016 despite a court ordering his release in September 2019 being tortured by the Houthis](https://www.jpost.com/opinion/article-760030)
2. [Interview with his family](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jo6w-5syFZk)
It's absolutely wild how in certain countries, non majority religions seem to be treated like an endangered species. Harrassed, persecuted (politically) and even attacked until there are none left
Insane religious supremacy
If you are the last Afghan Jew, you will become invincible and live forever. These two have a tontine type relationship where they're both just hard to kill.
OMG I would watch the shit out of that movie. Two Afghan Jew neighbors trying more and more elaborate ways to kill each other and gain immortality before they're too old to enjoy it. All the while spouting color af insults at each other
"I piss on your beard!"
"Oh yeah? I piss on your beard and your dead mother's beard!"
\[Nandor voice\] "...Fucking goy!"
Sounds like a spiritual sequel to Four Lions. I'd watch it
I'd also watch a Hancock-style one where they're both invincible unless they get too close to each other
It’s kinda fascinating to see similarities to the Jewish culture that I’m familiar with in the west. This interaction wouldn’t be out of place in New York.
The Taliban arrested them and immediately regretted it because of these two non stop bickering in their cell. Ended up releasing them because the constant fighting was too much for the Taliban to handle
As an Iranian I feel shame whenever I see a sad video from Afghanistan, these are our Aryan (historical, not the white supremacist one )brothers that we have left to decay. The real gold in this video is the language they speak and how it has survived the onslaught of Arabic,Turkish and other languages for the past 1400 years.
It’s really hard to classify, there are numerous variations of Judeo-Farsi/ Dari, they have lost words still in use from older Iranian languages mixed with an old variety of Hebrew. Judeo-Tati language variation from central Iran are sometimes only spoken by a single village.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Judeo-Iranian_languages&diffonly=true
Genocide and ethnic cleansing by Iranians, like the [Allahdad Pogrom](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allahdad?wprov=sfti1#). Though “lack of unity” is certainly one way to phrase it.
The Iranian culture has always protected the Jews since the time of Babylon and Cyrus, there is a reason these communities still exist in Iran… however since the events of 630 AD we have continually been left divided and broken. The late 1800s Iran barely had a central government, which is why massacres like this started happening to Zoroastrian communities as well, until 1920 when Pahlavi dynasty started.
Lack of Unity and cultural degradation by many invading armies following the Islamic conquest of Iran-Shahr better known as Persia, the cities of that region rivalled modern day London & Paris in Size, complexity, trade and education.
Much of this has to do with the reduction in flow of the Oxus River. (I think that is currently known as the Amu-Darya) It was fed by glacial melt from the Himalayas, and there was still leftover ice from the Ice Age when those cities were great. Alexander the Great's army was able to walk from Persia to India, which would be impossible for such a large group today, they would die of thirst.
For sure the climate change in the region has been a massive change towards drought and desertification. However by the time of the Sassanid Iran, major cities had been dealing with desertification for a while and had adapted through engineering. Even from the time of Darius at 500BC:
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shushtar_Historical_Hydraulic_System
The fall of civilization is what killed these cities. Almost all Iranian cities managed water through gardens:
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0qKcXI7qGlo&pp=ygUVSXJhbmlhbiBnYXJkZW4gcGFyZGlz
I should have said Abu-Bakr and Umar, who were Muhammad's fathers-in-law, but either way it was the Rashidun Caliphate founded by Muhammad that conquered Persia shortly after his death.
I was talking about the conquest of Persia, not Afghanistan. Not sure where the wires got crossed there. You're correct that the Umayyads were the ones to fully capture Afghanistan.
Abu-Bakr was caliph until his death in 634. The Caliphate invaded the Sassanids in 633, so not sure how that's not expanding.
Umar was Muhammad's father-in-law through his 4th wife Hafsa bint Umar.
I love that these two were such a gigantic pain in the ass that the fucking taliban, who'll happily stone someone to death for the tiniest infraction, refused to deal with them.
I mean if anything it paints the taliban as more chill than what you'd think .The ISIS types they are likened to would just put a bullet in them, no headache needed. Taliban were more like " fuck this shit i just want to go home and smoke some hash , y'all figure it out."
Yeah I mean as long as you aren’t a woman over age 5 trying to learn how to read. Side note, if you think this was recorded in an area that was at the time under Talib control you’re crazy. This was recorded at least 3 or 4 years ago. The last Jew left Afghanistan in 2021.
"atleast 3 or 4 years ago"
Checks date of upload, that's literally RIGHT under the video.........
"uploaded 16 years ago"
You're technically correct, yes. But the info was RIGHT there
Yeah idk they'd probably take the book away unless it was the quran, i never said they were cool just not the worst of the bunch. Also the article says this was in fact under taliban rule at the time.
No, because they were extremely careful to attempt compliance with the talibans rules/laws as *every single other Jew* in Afghanistan was expelled or murdered.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Jews_in_Afghanistan#:~:text=In%201935%2C%20a%20delegate%20to,one%20Jewish%20and%20one%20Muslim.
>In 1935, it was estimated 40,000 Bukharan Jews had been killed or starved to death
The full quote should be: 'In 1935, a delegate to the World Zionist Congress claimed that an estimated 40,000 Bukharan Jews had been killed or starved to death.'
You maliciously doctored that quote. Making it look like an academic presentation of fact when the origin of the statement is important.
- prior to the Taliban being in power.
-the vast majority of which probably just went to Israel
Seems like a pretty big thing to exclude from this conversation.
I think this story was actually reported as such in some kind of big publication or something, iirc. It was dressed up in more formal wording but, yes, essentially the guy was so annoying people just left him alone.
Again, iirc, Israel offered to transport him out of the country. As the last Jewish man in the country, he considered it a kind of PR opportunity and attempted bargaining with the Israeli government contacts to pay him money to leave.
The way this guy was written about is absolutely hilarious, and if even half of it is true the dude is a bona-fide character.
I believe from experience that you can find a jew so cranky and quick witted, with slang so provocative, captivating, and eviscerating, it's like a super power that makes them impossible to kill. I mean, a dude that would threaten to piss in your beard then dig up your dad's dad body and piss in his beard? You don't wanna mess with that guy. Also, his hearing is ridiculous! Either that, or he's got our boy's house wiretapped, which is also scary.
Side note: old Italian ladies also have this ability. Ask me how I know.
To whom it may concern, the documentary is by Dan Alexe, a Romanian writer, journalist and documentary film-maker. He's also one of the cooler contemporary Romanian novel writers.
"I am gonna piss on your and your fathers beard" is probably one of the most unhinged insults I heard sofar considering his father ist most likely already dead and him yelling this from across the yard.
\[Talks shit for a solid minute\]
"I wasn't talking about you! I wasn't even talking about him."
Son of a bitch! I think I'm on Zabulon's side, on second thought.
as a follow up, the last Afghan Jew left in 2021 leaving no more Jews in the country [https://www.theguardian.com/world/2021/sep/08/afghanistans-last-jew-leaves-country](https://www.theguardian.com/world/2021/sep/08/afghanistans-last-jew-leaves-country)
Oh shit, is it Zebulon himself!?!
Yep, the article mentions the old man in this video passed away at 80.
There's an *ackshuwally* to this story. Zebulon wasn't the last Jew in Afghanistan. He had a cousin emigrate to Isreal recently. She was able to recall everything from the Jewish community, with former residents validating her story. And she added one more thing: some of her children are still in Afghanistan. And they're still practicing in quiet.
oh that's nice, I fucking hate Zebulon, he's a complete schmuck, fucking get denier for 20 goddamn years
Zabulon will piss on your beard and your father's.
really? we're defending chaining women up now? interesting choice
It could be worse, they could have been with the Houthis in Yemen. 1. [The last Jew of Yemen is detained by the Houthis since 2016 despite a court ordering his release in September 2019 being tortured by the Houthis](https://www.jpost.com/opinion/article-760030) 2. [Interview with his family](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jo6w-5syFZk)
It's absolutely wild how in certain countries, non majority religions seem to be treated like an endangered species. Harrassed, persecuted (politically) and even attacked until there are none left Insane religious supremacy
Supremacy is a spectrum....
Brudda described Israel lmao.
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Well they are discriminated against, but I wouldn't say nearly as bad as a Jew would be treated in Yemen or Palestine.
This isn’t oppression Olympics. Call out oppression of one people and then ignore the other cuz it’s “not as bad”. Hypocrisy.
You're the one who brought up Israel. It's a major issue. Discrimination everywhere is an issue. I would hope everybody here agrees with that.
Those West Bank kids are living it up.
Two Afghan Jews walk into a bar…
there can only be one
Oylander
Heeeeere we are, born to be Jews!
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Triple goylander
If you are the last Afghan Jew, you will become invincible and live forever. These two have a tontine type relationship where they're both just hard to kill. OMG I would watch the shit out of that movie. Two Afghan Jew neighbors trying more and more elaborate ways to kill each other and gain immortality before they're too old to enjoy it. All the while spouting color af insults at each other "I piss on your beard!" "Oh yeah? I piss on your beard and your dead mother's beard!" \[Nandor voice\] "...Fucking goy!"
Sounds like a spiritual sequel to Four Lions. I'd watch it I'd also watch a Hancock-style one where they're both invincible unless they get too close to each other
Ah sort of how 1 out of every 5 smokers becomes immortal. Well I dont really know how it work but if only 4 out of 5 die.....
TIPLE GOY!!! - Boom, roasted
It’s kinda fascinating to see similarities to the Jewish culture that I’m familiar with in the west. This interaction wouldn’t be out of place in New York.
The Taliban arrested them and immediately regretted it because of these two non stop bickering in their cell. Ended up releasing them because the constant fighting was too much for the Taliban to handle
As an Iranian I feel shame whenever I see a sad video from Afghanistan, these are our Aryan (historical, not the white supremacist one )brothers that we have left to decay. The real gold in this video is the language they speak and how it has survived the onslaught of Arabic,Turkish and other languages for the past 1400 years.
What language are they speaking? Is it Farsi?
From what I know they speak Dari which is a dialect of Farsi.
There’s also a small area where they speak a Dravidian language! Dravidian is a completely unrelated language family from the southern part of India.
It’s really hard to classify, there are numerous variations of Judeo-Farsi/ Dari, they have lost words still in use from older Iranian languages mixed with an old variety of Hebrew. Judeo-Tati language variation from central Iran are sometimes only spoken by a single village. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Judeo-Iranian_languages&diffonly=true
why do you feel shame? im out of the loop.
A lot of Afghanistan's Jewish population were the descendants of Persians who fled forced conversion pogroms in the late 1800s
Genocide and ethnic cleansing by Iranians, like the [Allahdad Pogrom](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allahdad?wprov=sfti1#). Though “lack of unity” is certainly one way to phrase it.
The Iranian culture has always protected the Jews since the time of Babylon and Cyrus, there is a reason these communities still exist in Iran… however since the events of 630 AD we have continually been left divided and broken. The late 1800s Iran barely had a central government, which is why massacres like this started happening to Zoroastrian communities as well, until 1920 when Pahlavi dynasty started.
Lack of Unity and cultural degradation by many invading armies following the Islamic conquest of Iran-Shahr better known as Persia, the cities of that region rivalled modern day London & Paris in Size, complexity, trade and education.
Much of this has to do with the reduction in flow of the Oxus River. (I think that is currently known as the Amu-Darya) It was fed by glacial melt from the Himalayas, and there was still leftover ice from the Ice Age when those cities were great. Alexander the Great's army was able to walk from Persia to India, which would be impossible for such a large group today, they would die of thirst.
For sure the climate change in the region has been a massive change towards drought and desertification. However by the time of the Sassanid Iran, major cities had been dealing with desertification for a while and had adapted through engineering. Even from the time of Darius at 500BC: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shushtar_Historical_Hydraulic_System The fall of civilization is what killed these cities. Almost all Iranian cities managed water through gardens: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0qKcXI7qGlo&pp=ygUVSXJhbmlhbiBnYXJkZW4gcGFyZGlz
That video looks awesome, thanks!
Alexander wasn’t so great after all
Less Alexander and more Muhammad in this case and later Timur.
Muhammad never annexed Afghanistan. His campaigns never extended outside Arabia. Timur had a far bigger effect.
I should have said Abu-Bakr and Umar, who were Muhammad's fathers-in-law, but either way it was the Rashidun Caliphate founded by Muhammad that conquered Persia shortly after his death.
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I was talking about the conquest of Persia, not Afghanistan. Not sure where the wires got crossed there. You're correct that the Umayyads were the ones to fully capture Afghanistan. Abu-Bakr was caliph until his death in 634. The Caliphate invaded the Sassanids in 633, so not sure how that's not expanding. Umar was Muhammad's father-in-law through his 4th wife Hafsa bint Umar.
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And Iranian living in Canadian calling about "cultural degradation" and "invaders"...and without a hint of irony or self-awareness.
You had to go creep around my profile and all you found is that I’m Iranian-Canadian, and your brain went haywire on the concept of culture lool
Lmao I clearly touched a nerve by exposing your almighty lack of self-awarness hypocrisy
I was going to say as sad as this video is it’s amazing. I feel for them.
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Understatement
How so?
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OK but does he really say he'll piss on his beard and his father's? It seems like something Zabulon would say.
Poor Dan
Dan's never gonna get lunch at this rate!
I love that these two were such a gigantic pain in the ass that the fucking taliban, who'll happily stone someone to death for the tiniest infraction, refused to deal with them.
I mean if anything it paints the taliban as more chill than what you'd think .The ISIS types they are likened to would just put a bullet in them, no headache needed. Taliban were more like " fuck this shit i just want to go home and smoke some hash , y'all figure it out."
Yeah I mean as long as you aren’t a woman over age 5 trying to learn how to read. Side note, if you think this was recorded in an area that was at the time under Talib control you’re crazy. This was recorded at least 3 or 4 years ago. The last Jew left Afghanistan in 2021.
"atleast 3 or 4 years ago" Checks date of upload, that's literally RIGHT under the video......... "uploaded 16 years ago" You're technically correct, yes. But the info was RIGHT there
It was recorded at least 19 years ago as the main guy in this video died in 2005.
The video was uploaded 16 years ago. So there's that.
Yeah idk they'd probably take the book away unless it was the quran, i never said they were cool just not the worst of the bunch. Also the article says this was in fact under taliban rule at the time.
Until you wonder why there were only two (and zero now).
they had a free card to get out of afghanistan to a much wealthier country, why wouldnt most of them take it?
Yeah, wealth was definitely the main factor.
What kind of moronic comment is this? Do you think the taliban wouldn’t have just killed them? Lmfao
>Do you think the taliban wouldn’t have just killed them? Did the Taliban kill them?
No, because they were extremely careful to attempt compliance with the talibans rules/laws as *every single other Jew* in Afghanistan was expelled or murdered.
Interesting, source?
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_the_Jews_in_Afghanistan#:~:text=In%201935%2C%20a%20delegate%20to,one%20Jewish%20and%20one%20Muslim. >In 1935, it was estimated 40,000 Bukharan Jews had been killed or starved to death
Ahh yes, who can forget 1935? The height of Taliban rule.
Leaves from the tree of Islamic fundamentalism. Judaism went extinct in Afghanistan after thousands of years under their rule.
Or, alternatively, there may have been another reason they started to disappear from every Muslim country around 1949 ish.
Good thing that pogrom happened before Israel existed lmao
The full quote should be: 'In 1935, a delegate to the World Zionist Congress claimed that an estimated 40,000 Bukharan Jews had been killed or starved to death.' You maliciously doctored that quote. Making it look like an academic presentation of fact when the origin of the statement is important.
That was literally how the quote looked in the source of the web browser. I did not alter a single thing.
It's just part of a mythos. It doesn't have to actually be accurate as long as it supports the victim narrative.
- prior to the Taliban being in power. -the vast majority of which probably just went to Israel Seems like a pretty big thing to exclude from this conversation.
I think this story was actually reported as such in some kind of big publication or something, iirc. It was dressed up in more formal wording but, yes, essentially the guy was so annoying people just left him alone. Again, iirc, Israel offered to transport him out of the country. As the last Jewish man in the country, he considered it a kind of PR opportunity and attempted bargaining with the Israeli government contacts to pay him money to leave. The way this guy was written about is absolutely hilarious, and if even half of it is true the dude is a bona-fide character.
I believe from experience that you can find a jew so cranky and quick witted, with slang so provocative, captivating, and eviscerating, it's like a super power that makes them impossible to kill. I mean, a dude that would threaten to piss in your beard then dig up your dad's dad body and piss in his beard? You don't wanna mess with that guy. Also, his hearing is ridiculous! Either that, or he's got our boy's house wiretapped, which is also scary. Side note: old Italian ladies also have this ability. Ask me how I know.
I can literally promise you that there is no such thing as “too annoying to kill” to a group like the taliban.
These jokes are next level
This seems like it's right out of Borat
Huh? Spoken like a true American.
Dat der sounds forin r aribik or summit
To whom it may concern, the documentary is by Dan Alexe, a Romanian writer, journalist and documentary film-maker. He's also one of the cooler contemporary Romanian novel writers.
Interesting that bad is also bad Dari/Farsi
Oy Gevalt! Meshuggah everywhere!
*New Millennium Cyanide Christ* intensifies
I'm on Zebulon's side, the old goy seems like he knows he's an asshole.
Old man calls himself a pimp, a scoundrel and a sorceror. He is literally my hero.
They argued over which synagogue to attend. “Yours is too reform! I’m looking for reconstructionist!”
I read this as Afghan Wigs, and I was wondering what (fat) Greg Dulli was up to.
pretty comical metaphor "only two men left in the world, and they choose to fight". Just seems sort of likely.
"I am gonna piss on your and your fathers beard" is probably one of the most unhinged insults I heard sofar considering his father ist most likely already dead and him yelling this from across the yard.
"i'm more loved by my god than you are" - Religion: A New Way To Hate Each Other
3 minutes I'll never get back.
Man, that guy looks pretty rough for 43.
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\[Talks shit for a solid minute\] "I wasn't talking about you! I wasn't even talking about him." Son of a bitch! I think I'm on Zabulon's side, on second thought.
Are they looking to take over each others land?
Those aren't jews lmfao
source?